trixie21 Posted September 9, 2009 Posted September 9, 2009 What is it with exes that they think that they can still tell you what to do afetr walking out on you after 13 years. He has just been to pick up our son and went onto tell me what he thinks I should be doing ect ect and then went onto tell me that he is going on a date woth one girl and another one is interested in him. This girl that he is going on a date with has been interested for a few years now BUT she is already in a relationship!!!! I don't know maybe he is just on a mission to break anyone up. I am doing alot better though lately and can now see that he didn't treat me very well at all for the last year and I now believe that I am much better off without him, I certinaly don't want him back. I know it's only been a few weeks but I am a very strong and independant girl, should I really be feeling like this after such a short time or is it a case of deep down I felt the same way as he did but i just didn't want to admit it?
TaraMaiden Posted September 9, 2009 Posted September 9, 2009 Ok... separate it, and split the emotional from the practical. Just look at the practical first: pretend it's a babysitter, or a neightbour, or the milk delivery guy telling you this - What is it he told you, you should be doing? Does it make sense? Is it useful advice? What do you agree with? Why? What don't you agree with? Why? Weigh it up without thinking about the fact he's your ex- and the things he's doing. You could certainly find much to criticise in what he's doing too, but it's his life now. let him live it and reap the consequences.... his choices, his decisions.... providing they do not affect your child together.... But as for his advice to you - don't not take it, simply because of who he is> Decide whether to take it, based on whether you think it is sound, or not. And bear in mind, he may well still have an agenda.
Author trixie21 Posted September 9, 2009 Author Posted September 9, 2009 I can see where your coming from but from what he was saying to me and telling me not to do and then he turned around and said that he knew that I wouldn't do that anyway, I think that he is proberbly trying to see if he still has control over me. So really no it didn't make much sense what he was saying, I also think that maybe his family are causing abit of trouble and lies which they think will help us both move on from this relationship. You see after 13 years of us being together I have grown very close to his family and we are all still on excellent terms, maybe thats what went wrong and how we ended up more like brother and sister than anything else.
TaraMaiden Posted September 9, 2009 Posted September 9, 2009 In that case, just take a deep breath, and ignore it. if his family try to talk to you, just smile sweetly and reply "It's over, and I'm over him, so really, there's nothing more to discuss." Then change the subject. To something completely different, like, when would a good time to plant roses, be?
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