dianna Posted September 5, 2009 Posted September 5, 2009 Lol..well let's share stuff we did the day of the break up and we are ashamed I remember..after the crying..yelling at him..i crawled to the kitchen floor..cried 5 houres straight, i remember the dog looking at me with his big eyes and started to lick me..ripped my heart out.. ..then went to the living...I punched a pillow..tried to rip it apart..then cried and passed out...near the pillow .Woke up the next day and started to cry.I didn't recognise myself for almost a month. Never again..I HOPE
LucreziaBorgia Posted September 5, 2009 Posted September 5, 2009 I spent nearly a month doing nothing but sleeping when it wasn't my night with my daughter. I also binged. A lot. Gained some weight. I feel pretty stupid right now wasting nearly a whole month (well, the two weeks of it I wasn't in the hospital) crying, moping, sleeping, gorging. Stupid, and now chunky. Going to work it off. I will take that as my penance for being such a dumb4ss over someone I aimed too low for to begin with.
moo Posted September 5, 2009 Posted September 5, 2009 I went down into the mud: emails to him that were really hitting below the belt..just really horribly insulting...calling him a whore, cursing him out, bringing up bad things he shared with me and using them against him. He deserved everything I wrote to him, but it was still mean. Binging, staying in bed, needing help while walking because I was weak with depression. I don't plan on ever acting that way again.
deux ex machina Posted September 5, 2009 Posted September 5, 2009 One of the dumbest scenes ever was this... A love triangle, the boy (him), the girl (me), and the other girl (her). In a 24 hour period of time: * She told him she'd be over, naked, save high heels and a smile. This was a response to... * Him, leaving my place, and her hearing about it. Which was in response to... * Me, furious, lifting my hand up the one and only time to a man. I wanted to slap him. Thankfully I stopped myself. But just the fact I almost did scared me. It was in response to... * Her, GOING TO HER KNEES IN THE STREET O_O, BEGGING him to be with her - she wanted a chance to prove herself. He gave her a look of contempt, really...but eventually they did end up together that afternoon... * Ect. This was a mere snapshot of one 24 hour period of time in this triangle. I was only High School when all of this occured, which explains a lot! Oh drama! The tears! Within months of putting it all behind me, I realized that the whole thing? It was much more a competition between this girl and I than anything. In fact, if one of us got the guy with no competition involved, we wouldn't have wanted him. Embarrassing.
bhweller Posted September 5, 2009 Posted September 5, 2009 I am ashamed that I actually gave her money and felt sorry for her when she was already dating somebody else and didn't tell me.
Solear Posted September 5, 2009 Posted September 5, 2009 i found out by text on a train, felt myself breaking down, went home early from work, bought a bottle of vodka and walked 12 miles, sat on a mountain and cried like ive never cried in my life. Am still crying a month later i've had a nervous breakdown and ive lost two stone. I think this was the straw that broke the camels back
Author dianna Posted September 5, 2009 Author Posted September 5, 2009 Solear - Yeah, after I posted this I started to cry near the door. This is unbelieveble..I never cried so much in my life . Im kind of losing it . And I've lost 5 kg..and im now at 41 kg...
icyness Posted September 5, 2009 Posted September 5, 2009 I begged, I begged I begged. Cried uncontrollably, Called him second after second, left sobbing, pleading, ridiculous voice mails and texts, wrote those novel length emails of how we belong together, and yes even told him several times I have no reason to go on/I'd kill myself if he left it this way. Eek.
Author dianna Posted September 5, 2009 Author Posted September 5, 2009 Icyness-double eek ... how are you holding on now?
Thaddeus Posted September 5, 2009 Posted September 5, 2009 I used to vote Conservative. Does that count? Oh... this is the "Coping" section. nevermind
moo Posted September 5, 2009 Posted September 5, 2009 i found out by text on a train, felt myself breaking down, went home early from work, bought a bottle of vodka and walked 12 miles, sat on a mountain and cried like ive never cried in my life. Am still crying a month later i've had a nervous breakdown and ive lost two stone. I think this was the straw that broke the camels back oh my. are you okay now? are you seeing a therapist? by the way, what is two stone? Is that some kind of weight?
icyness Posted September 5, 2009 Posted September 5, 2009 Icyness-double eek ... how are you holding on now? Dianna, well I'm alright, thank you. Honestly I still feel just as bad, minus the threats to kill myself. Don't know if that's good or bad, but yeah. How about you?
Ingenue Posted September 6, 2009 Posted September 6, 2009 I got dumped by email so immediately after receiving the email dump, I called my friend to cancel the dinner I had scheduled with her that night citing that I wouldn't be in the mood to be out. Then I went home, collapsed on my floor and cried for close to 5 hours straight. After that, I didn't eat for 2 weeks, neglected my friends for a month or two and just wallowed in my own self-pity I wish I hadn't done any of those things, particularly cancelling out on my friend for dinner. It would have been one of the last dinners we had together before she moved out of the city. Instead, I spent the night crying over a douche of a man who lacked the courage to break up with me respectfully.
Taucher Posted September 6, 2009 Posted September 6, 2009 She left me at 11AM on a lovely Saturday morning, the day before our official 4 year anniversary. We were sort of going out for 5 years but the first year was very on and off. Anyway, when she went, I spent the day being calm. I can't explain this now - maybe I didn't believe it was over. 2 hours in, I texted her and said "I miss you" She texted back that she missed me too. My friend came round who lives close. We sat on my balcony drinking beer that evening. This friend has since told me that she has deep feelings for me (which explains why she told me that my ex was no good for me! haha!). I dont see this friend anymore, sadly. The first night her pillow still smelt of her and that made me feel so sad. I kept the tv on all night - it was on Sky Sports News, which I cant watch anymore without feeling sad. Isn't that weird? The next day is when it hit home. I went to stay at my parents cos I could not bear being in the flat alone. My parents live on a farm in the middle of nowhere. The peace and quiet made me feel worse and I felt so far away from my ex. I called my ex the next day and did the whole begging thing. My ex cried alot. I never begged since, I felt undignified and could see it was a bad thing to do. When I got back to London and our flat, I spent the next month calling different friends every night to go for a drink. On nights when I was on my own, I went to the pub alone. Not a good look. 2 weeks in, I broke down at work and cried, my manager sent me home and gave me the week off. I went back to work after 2 days as being alone with nothing to do in the day was worse. I think I was a very boring person to be around at this time but my friends were all there for me. Ok, I have gone a bit overboard here. The question asked for the day of the break up. Sorry about that. Feel better for writing it down though. Hang in there everyone, you are not alone. Our stories on here are all similar. T
GrayClouds Posted September 6, 2009 Posted September 6, 2009 oh my. are you okay now? are you seeing a therapist? by the way, what is two stone? Is that some kind of weight? Stone= 14lb
xpaperxcutx Posted September 6, 2009 Posted September 6, 2009 Breakups make me want to eat. We weren't dating but I liked him enough to ask for more, and when he didn't reciprocate, I took a subway ride home ( all the while listening to my ipod and pretending I didn't exist). I dropped by the store to grab some sushi, went home, ate and forced myself to puke ( My bulimia resurfaced at the time). Then I spent the next week and a half at home.
bluewolf17 Posted September 6, 2009 Posted September 6, 2009 Hmm I called in "sick" to work for a week. I came back and had a meeting with a territory rep and cried in front of her, and some other vips... the worst thing I did was blame myself.
irishsimon Posted September 6, 2009 Posted September 6, 2009 After seeing the previous threads I think I may have taken it better than i thought. I certainly felt the same as everyone else. I lost weight, didnt eat, stopped training, gave her all the power in the world. I sent 5 long emails, called once and had three texting sessions initiated by me over the three months since the split. Still ashamed I didnt just walk away with strict NC though.
Author dianna Posted September 6, 2009 Author Posted September 6, 2009 Icyness..i still cry everyday and feel pathetic ..no improvement
Woggle Posted September 6, 2009 Posted September 6, 2009 I went a bender for nearly two days after D-day and after it was all over I sat with a loaded gun on my coffee table ready to do myself in. I hate to sound like a religious nut but there was an outside force that would not let me go through it and I am thankful everyday for that.
Author dianna Posted September 6, 2009 Author Posted September 6, 2009 Woggle -I believe you. 3 weeks ago I was having such a bad day, I was crying so hard ..went straight to the railway and sat there the whole day ..5 train passed and I didn't do it... The thing is..when I remember that day, I don't regret it..I don't regret having suicidal thoughts ..even thought its a bit insane. My nerves are wrecked anyway.
Woggle Posted September 6, 2009 Posted September 6, 2009 Woggle -I believe you. 3 weeks ago I was having such a bad day, I was crying so hard ..went straight to the railway and sat there the whole day ..5 train passed and I didn't do it... The thing is..when I remember that day, I don't regret it..I don't regret having suicidal thoughts ..even thought its a bit insane. My nerves are wrecked anyway. I don't regret that weekend either. That was a major turning point in my life and my attitude and for the most part it has been all uphill from there.
ahotmess Posted September 6, 2009 Posted September 6, 2009 My only regret is thinking that this breakup was somehow my fault, and/or thinking that he was in a bad place emotionally and making a poor decision. I regret the letter I wrote, read to, and gave him. In it I poured my heart out about how much I believed in him and our love. I didnt beg. I did cry...he cried, saying he was confused, in a bad place emotionally and felt he was dragging me down. The day after our breakup, he hooked up with my good friend who is married. That was two months ago. They just moved in together last week and she is in the proscess of divorce. Ironically I have never felt more grounded, blessed and thankful to be alive. It was a hard six weeks that followed, but I have maintained strict NC and really am living my life now.....its amazing, and BTW- I am still single and ok with that too.
Peanut9330 Posted September 6, 2009 Posted September 6, 2009 I was a zombie for three weeks I did nothing other than going to work and doing only the minimal so I don’t lose my job than I would come home eat, cry and sleep. I wish I knew the truth right from the start because if I did I would have never acted the way I did, I'm so disgusted by him!!! :sick:
angelface78 Posted September 6, 2009 Posted September 6, 2009 I cried inside a closet on the floor. I called my friend and cried to him for over an hour. I went to bed and woke up to an anxiety attack. Heart beating like crazy ...somehow made my way to the bathroom to wash my face with cold water where i began to feel like throwing up...but nothing was coming out ...my stomach just convulsing. I found this website...went into strict NC and here i am 2 and a half months later...still in pain but ALIVE....SOMEHOW ALIVE!!!
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