phineas Posted September 5, 2009 Posted September 5, 2009 Let me clarify: I'm separated & getting a divorce. It's going to take another 5 months. I'm over the STBXW completely. I spent a few hrs in our kids dr's office with the STBXW for their check-ups & shots. On our 4th aniversarry no less! Felt nothing. I mean ziltch. could care less she was there. I was indifferent to her presence. she is the mother of my children. I was there for my kids. I would not take her back. I've been warned about rebounding & that is always on my mind. my situation. There is a woman at work age 35 (i'm 37) Earlier in the yr I was talking to her & she was very direct in asking about my marital status. My marriage was crap at the time because I knew my wife was cheating on me but I told her I was married & left it at that. I did not flirt with her. Now, it's over. I've recently been in her department doing upgrades for the last few weeks & she once again indirectly asked me about my marital status. when she learned my wife was out of the house for 6 months it was like "Game on" for her. she also shared that her marriage ended because her husband was cheating & actually asked me if i've turned into a male slut now that i'm single. like I said. very direct. She is interested. She is giving the signs & not being shy about it. Not crude, but she is using every excuse to touch my arm, giving the "high-5" move when I fix an issue after an upgrade on our crappy software. telling me I deserve a drink & offering to buy me coffee & pretty much just talking to the department like i'm the computer god & busting my chops. I've been playing it cool because I really don't know what i'm doing anymore. i've been off the market almost 7 yrs. Despite her looks i'm more attracted to her personality. I don't want anything serious right now, but I also don't want to randomly date or sit home alone watching TV in my boxers. Though that is fun. I've also got the bang-buddy option just a phone call away but that just doesn't interest me right now. This woman cracks me up & I do enjoy talking to her. she's from Brazil & very attractive. It's a little overwhelming for me to have such an attractive woman act nervous around me & even though i'm almost sure she won't turn me down, i'm still a little nervous. I'm not shy, just not sure about how to ask her out. I can't do it when she is surrounded by co-workers & i'm not about to do it in e-mail. She did ask me a question about her home computer & I did let her know i'd be home this weekend if she wanted to ask me anything & she said she'd keep that in mind, thanked me & told me to have a nice weekend with my kids. Her boss is a slave driver so no hanging around in her cube "disrupting" her work. Her phone is part of a pool so no luck there. only outgoing calls are possible. She does have my cell number from last week when she asked for it so she could call me when it was time to run the batch process I was troubleshooting. I was hoping she'd just call me or text me or something & make it easy for me but no such luck. Did I blow it by not just asking her out? Did I make her think I wasn't interested? I honestly didn't even realize she liked me until last week & it really shocked me because I wasn't looking for it really. any ideas on how I handle this? On a side note I do not work with her. I'm in her department maybe 4 or 5 times a yr regularly. were doing upgrades so i've been in there quite a bit lately so i'm not worried about awkward situations or anything affecting my job. I'm also not her superior. just the computer guy. LOL!
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