northstar1 Posted September 2, 2009 Posted September 2, 2009 This conversation came up recently with some friends. Would you date someone who was a recovering addict (say alcohol, or a narcotic)? Say they had gotten themselves cleaned up and were living a productive life, would you be able to form a relationship with them?
Hkizzle Posted September 2, 2009 Posted September 2, 2009 No, because there are other choices out there.
bluewolf17 Posted September 2, 2009 Posted September 2, 2009 Most likely not. It would depend on how crazy I was about the person, and how long they have been clean. I have done a LOT of research on addictions and disease, so anything under 3 yrs clean would probably be a no.
torranceshipman Posted September 2, 2009 Posted September 2, 2009 No, definitly not. But I'm not passing judgment, I have a lot of respect for people who turn their lives around. It's just a personal thing for me that I wouldn't ever date someone with substance abuse problems/who are in recovery-too many potential problems.
Mr. Stumpy Posted September 2, 2009 Posted September 2, 2009 a recovering addict is a beautiful thing... i have many buddies that are in NA/AA and they get hella girls. they just can't drink or do drugs.
Hkizzle Posted September 2, 2009 Posted September 2, 2009 Most likely not. It would depend on how crazy I was about the person, and how long they have been clean. I have done a LOT of research on addictions and disease, so anything under 3 yrs clean would probably be a no. 3 yrs is the safe time where the chance of going back to old habits drops significantly? Also for what addictions?
Author northstar1 Posted September 2, 2009 Author Posted September 2, 2009 Most likely not. It would depend on how crazy I was about the person, and how long they have been clean. I have done a LOT of research on addictions and disease, so anything under 3 yrs clean would probably be a no. Good points, interesting you say that. This came up because a friend of ours has gotten involved with a girl who got pretty hard into the club drug scene a few years ago. She apparently got herself clean and walked away from that life and lives a healthy lifestyle now. Our friendship group was pretty split on if they'd be willing to walk that path or not.
caramel c Posted September 2, 2009 Posted September 2, 2009 I would consider it depending on how long they've been clean and what I observe about their current lifestyle.
SierraRose Posted September 2, 2009 Posted September 2, 2009 I think it is very difficult to date, or have a LTR with a recovering addict. I used to live with a recovering alcoholic. He was extremely difficult to deal with. His entire existence focused on staying sober to the point it was affecting my life, our life together. He went to meetings, made friends in AA. I was totally supportive of that. However, I do drink socially. I like a glass of wine over dinner. I enjoy a beer while doing yard work. I do not drink hard liquor, or abuse alcohol. I was not "allowed" to have any alcohol in the house. I would go out with the girls, and he would complain if I came home smelling of wine. He would avoid any and every social engagement, and forbid any alcohol of any kind in our apartment, even when we hosted holidays. It honestly, got old, very fast. Personally, I think recovering addicts should stick with recovering addicts. They lead the same lifestyle and have the same focus--staying sober.
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