Talk about mixed signals - don't know what to think

[Platinumwell]

Hi all

 

I am looking for some advice/opinions here, before my head melts.

 

There's a new girl at work (I say new girl, she has been here 3 months now) and we pretty much hit it off straight away. In fact I don't think I have ever got on so well with anyone so quickly. We have a laugh, she is always smiling at me, we have a LOT of eye contact etc. We work in seperate departments on the same floor but I go and sit with her when she is alone, and vice versa.

 

She has asked me a few times to come and work in her office, and sometimes she will come and stand/sit really close to me (so close we are touching).

 

At this point I was looking for a new house, and she suggested I move to her town. I had a look in the area and found a nice place which I am now living in.

 

I give her a lift to work every morning, we never seem to run out of things to talk about, we have everything in common and things seemed to be going well. I gave her my number, we exchanged a few text messages etc. She even suggested going out one weekend. When we walk from the car to the office, she walks so close to me our arms touch.

 

Saturday afternoon I sent her a text message asking if she wasn't doing anything would she like to go out Sunday night, to which I got no reply. Sunday night she finally replied apologising for the delay but she had been really busy, which was fine. She said she wasn't available that night but would I like her to let me know if anything is going on on Monday. I agreed but told her I had to go to work at some point but I would work around any plans we made, to which she said to text her when I finish work.

 

Monday came, I went in early so I could get away early, and sent her a message, again no reply. 2 hours later I sent yet another saying I was home so if she wants to do anything let me know, and got a reply along the lines of "sorry no1 is answering so I don't think any1 is doing anything, and I can't do anything later cos it's my bfs dads bday"

 

she had never mentioned a boyfriend before, so I apologised and said I didn't realise. She said no worries, you should come out next Friday when everyone is out, it should be fun.

 

This morning I picked her up for work, she looked more beautiful than ever, she had her hair up and looked stunning, almost as if she had made a special effort.

 

I really don't know what to make of it

[Thaddeus]

Sorry to say, but you're friend-zoned. Forget about being romantically involved with her, it's just not going to happen.

[BCCA]

she had never mentioned a boyfriend before, so I apologised and said I didn't realise.

 

She was getting attention from you, and she knew mentioning the bf would make it all come to a screeching hault. She either A) has a bf, and just likes your attention on the side, or B) does not have a bf and is not interested in you.

 

Either way, Thaddeus is spot on; this is a lost cause.

[Wakely]

When we're interested in someone, we tend to see what we want to see. This girl probably likes your attention/friendship, but it's clear she's not interested in you.

[fishtaco]

You know how sometimes a girl likes a guy, but the guy really isn't into her, so they end up having sex because that's what the guy wants, but it never moves beyond that?

 

That's what happened here, with the genders reversed and the "goal" updated to what women want.

[boogieboy]

You know how sometimes a girl likes a guy, but the guy really isn't into her, so they end up having sex because that's what the guy wants, but it never moves beyond that?

 

That's what happened here, with the genders reversed and the "goal" updated to what women want.

 

Yep, women get friend zoned for sex, guys get friend zoned for time/attention. You have been getting used for all this time. Next time, make some moves early so you dont waste so much time next time.