Absolutely Curtains Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 This is the scenario: A group of girl friends (who have all known each other for anywhere from a few years ago to two decades ago) are hanging out one weekend. Their boyfriends are all there. Each bf has been dating his girl for at least 2 years, and so he has also known all the girls for at least 2 years (and some of the guys have been friends with the other girls for years also). Everyone gets totally hammered. 6 people are in the hot tub - 4 of the girls and 2 of their bfs. 2 girls' bathing suit tops end up coming off (for two different reasons). No one can see anything (it's dark/night, there's bubbles, no one wants to flash anyone...). Now, obviously I know how this scenario worked out, and I'm a little surprised and not sure what to think. So my question is: please state if you're a male or female, and your take on this (would you be mad, uncomfortable, etc.).
Lizzie60 Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 I am not sure if I'd be mad or not.. depends on the 'circumstances' and the mood of the evening.. but ... what about the same group of people on a beach in Mexico.. and the girls taking all their tops off.. Like I said.. it's all about the 'mood' of the evening..
boldjack Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 OP, you answered your own question with your title. If you have a HT or pool and you tell everybody that "skinny dipping", might happen, and that bathing suits are optional, each person can decide, for themselves, what level of nudity is comfortable for each.
New Again Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 From your OP I'm guessing that the bfs got mad? I can't imagine getting mad about that, as a girl, unless my bf was one of the ones in the hot tub, and he was staring or making inappropriate comments to one of the other girls.
Vet Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 Needs more explanation: were there four guys and four girls that were hanging out, but only two of the guys were in the tub? Were the two girls that took off their tops the ones that didn't have their boyfriends in the tub?
Author Absolutely Curtains Posted August 31, 2009 Author Posted August 31, 2009 Needs more explanation: were there four guys and four girls that were hanging out, but only two of the guys were in the tub? Were the two girls that took off their tops the ones that didn't have their boyfriends in the tub? There were 7 couples/14 people. 4 girls were hanging out in the hot tub, and 2 of their bfs were also in the hot tub. The other 8 people were in the house. The two with bfs took their tops off, or had it taken off of her.
Vet Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 There were 7 couples/14 people. 4 girls were hanging out in the hot tub, and 2 of their bfs were also in the hot tub. The other 8 people were in the house. The two with bfs took their tops off, or had it taken off of her. ...had it taken off of her?
silverfish Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 I guess the ones with the boyfriends started getting frisky and the other girls w/out their boyfriends there got embarrassed or something? OR it was dark maybe they got their girls mixed up? Sounds like a Carry on Film
Author Absolutely Curtains Posted August 31, 2009 Author Posted August 31, 2009 ...had it taken off of her? By another girl who was rubbing her shoulders/scratching her back. I guess the ones with the boyfriends started getting frisky and the other girls w/out their boyfriends there got embarrassed or something? OR it was dark maybe they got their girls mixed up? Sounds like a Carry on Film No one was getting frisky, everyone was just hanging out. It was pretty segregated too; the two boys in one end hanging out and the girls in the other end hanging out. The two boys were really mad; none of the girls cared at all, and didn't think anything of it. I'm just trying to figure this out. It's been suggested that one of the guys is really jealous, and the other one just wanted a reason to be mad. But, of course, this is the analysis of the girls.
butcher's hook Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 I don't understand the question, or your involvement in all this or what you are trying to figure out!?!? Bottom line though from what I can gather nudity amongst long standing friends, especially couple friends, doesn't seem a appropriate to me unless you all want to get it on. I would have more respect than to take off my biking top in front of other couple friends. That's just me though. to give you an idea I ran into a good male friend of mine many years ago while vacationing in Spain at the beach, I had no idea he would be there the same time as myself but he saw me and I was topless at the time. It was surreal. I felt completely uncomfortable. It was like seeing your brother and being naked while doing so.
prettybaby Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 Ok, I don't understand this mess at all Whoever got mad must have given a reason, right? People don't just go around shouting "arrgh, I'm mad" We're talking about a bunch of drunk couples, a bath tub, and some missing tops. Who is mad at who and why?
Vet Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 By another girl who was rubbing her shoulders/scratching her back. No one was getting frisky, everyone was just hanging out. It was pretty segregated too; the two boys in one end hanging out and the girls in the other end hanging out. The two boys were really mad; none of the girls cared at all, and didn't think anything of it. I'm just trying to figure this out. It's been suggested that one of the guys is really jealous, and the other one just wanted a reason to be mad. But, of course, this is the analysis of the girls. If being topless in a hot tub upsets someone, I would think that their significant other would respect them enough not to do it. That should be enough in itself, should it not?
silverfish Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 Maybe it was misguided jealousy at them for one girl taking off the other friends top. The first one for doing it and the second one for letting her do it. It might not be another man doing it, but its still someone doing it so there could be jealousy involved...? Seems a bit daft though.
Quinch Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 If I'm in a mixed sex hot tub with my girlfriend and other people - boys and girls - and everyone is naked and the other guys are checking out my g/f then I would feel uncomfortable but I couldn't complain too loud because I would probably be checking out their girlfriends too and their girlfriends might be checking me out (hey, it happens). But what happens in the hot tub stays in the hot tub.
butcher's hook Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 . But what happens in the hot tub stays in the hot tub. yeah better it stays there. I'd just hate to be the one to have to clean it out.
Lyssa Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 I'm no prude - whatever everyone else wants to do, go ahead. Myself? I won't feel comfortable going naked in front of anyone else BUT my partner. Oh but in front of my GFs - no problem.
butcher's hook Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 I'm no prude - whatever everyone else wants to do, go ahead. Myself? I won't feel comfortable going naked in front of anyone else BUT my partner. Oh but in front of my GFs - no problem. I agree with everything you said. I think it's disrespecful to our men unless of course he gets off on that kind of thing. My current bo and my last bo are/were insanely jealous in this respect, my current bo won't even fool around with me at my place in my living room if the blinds are up at night. He pulls them down "incase neighbours can see us". I don't care at all, but he gets very "territorial. I can't imagine him digging me getting naked in a hot tub with his and my friends around nor can I imagine me wanting to no matter how much I had to drink. If we were on vacation with strangers totally different story.
Lyssa Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 I agree with everything you said. I think it's disrespecful to our men unless of course he gets off on that kind of thing. My current bo and my last bo are/were insanely jealous in this respect, my current bo won't even fool around with me at my place in my living room if the blinds are up at night. He pulls them down "incase neighbours can see us". I don't care at all, but he gets very "territorial. I can't imagine him digging me getting naked in a hot tub with his and my friends around nor can I imagine me wanting to no matter how much I had to drink. If we were on vacation with strangers totally different story. Haha - that's cute. My SO is pretty alright when it comes to that, he'd let the curtains be. I think we would probably give nude beach a try if it were thousands of miles away from everyone we know! . It's weird for me to be topless in front of my guyfriends or his buddies. Too effing weird and argh so uncomfortable. Like you said, it's like seeing your sibling naked!
Author Absolutely Curtains Posted August 31, 2009 Author Posted August 31, 2009 My involvement and interest in trying to understand other points of view on this is that I was there, and this ended up causing some drama. I'm just trying to make sense of the situation out of my own curiosity. No one saw anyone else naked. In fact, unless one of the girls had stood up, there's no way anyone could have seen anything. Even then I'm not sure anyone would have been able to see much, if anything.. Besides the bubbles, it was very dark. No one did it knowing their bf would wouldn't like it; in fact, one of the boys in question had been encouraging such all weekend and that night in particular. Neither bf gave a reason (that I know of) and in discussing with the gfs afterward, they weren't given reasons either. Just a "I'm mad at you, that was a bad idea, you're a slut."
butcher's hook Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 what's the point then if it was dark and no one could see and the bubbles covered it all and it was off to a secluded part of the yard, other than to get a rise out of anyone who was in that hot tub?!?!? mission accomplished.
Author Absolutely Curtains Posted August 31, 2009 Author Posted August 31, 2009 Oh, and also: Another reason I'm having a hard time understanding why one bf in particular was mad about this is because: Earlier that night, different people were in the hot tub, and one of the guys dragged another girl (the girl who's top was taken off of her) fully clothed into the hot tub. He then wrapped his arms around her so she couldn't move, and unbuttoned and unzipped her pants and started pulling them off. She was protesting, NOT laughing, and she was obviously mad. Yet her bf didn't have the tiniest problem with this whatsoever, and she actually got a little miffed at him for not caring about this and saying something to the other guy to back her up. She said something to her bf about it when they were sober and all he said was "Yeah, that was a little messed up." And that was it. So...for him especially I don't get why he was so angry about the other thing. It doesn't make sense to any of us girls.
Author Absolutely Curtains Posted August 31, 2009 Author Posted August 31, 2009 what's the point then if it was dark and no one could see and the bubbles covered it all and it was off to a secluded part of the yard, other than to get a rise out of anyone who was in that hot tub?!?!? mission accomplished. No, I really believe it was an issue of comfort. Unless I don't know my friends as well as I think I do.
Adunaphel Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 Had it been my bf and some girlfriends of mine in the tub, I could break a long-time friendship over it. And I'd give my bf hell about it. Another reason I'm having a hard time understanding why one bf in particular was mad about this is because: Earlier that night, different people were in the hot tub, and one of the guys dragged another girl (the girl who's top was taken off of her) fully clothed into the hot tub. He then wrapped his arms around her so she couldn't move, and unbuttoned and unzipped her pants and started pulling them off. She was protesting, NOT laughing, and she was obviously mad. Yet her bf didn't have the tiniest problem with this whatsoever, and she actually got a little miffed at him for not caring about this and saying something to the other guy to back her up. She said something to her bf about it when they were sober and all he said was "Yeah, that was a little messed up." And that was it.So...for him especially I don't get why he was so angry about the other thing. It doesn't make sense to any of us girls. To me it makes perfect sense. First episode: gf was dragged in the situation, were clearly unconfortable, bf is very supportive of her and does not make a scene knowing it's not her fault. Might plan on having a talk with the male friend but does not want to make a scene and embarass his gf further. Second episode: gf chooses to be in the situation and act inappropriately. Bf might think she is playing games and trying to make him jealous. Feels treated like a stupid for having been so undestanding and cool before. It sheds a different light on the other episode, too. He also might be upset because if his gf was innocent in the first episode, by taking her top off she is looking for trouble, and she should know better expecially after the first episode.
New Again Posted August 31, 2009 Posted August 31, 2009 Huh, sounds like there was quite a bit of drama. I agree with some of the things the above poster said; however, I also don't get why the bf didn't care about the first thing and he did about the second. Obviously he shouldn't be mad at his gf in the first situation; he should be mad at the guy, but he wasn't. It also doesn't sound to me like he was supportive of his gf in that situation - he just ignored what was going on, was my take on it. He didn't even support her when they talked about it later. Second, it seemed like he made a scene in the second situation - but he didn't in the first. So again, he wasn't at all supportive of his gf. Was this the same bf who was encouraging tops coming off??
Recommended Posts