gypsi Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 It has been 7 months and i am finally over the crying and hoping for her to come back, i have let go...but somehow i dont feel like me anymore i feel strange i dont know how to describe it. Will you ever be the same person again after a terrible heartbreak?
deux ex machina Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 Probably not. Does that mean it's a bad thing? No. It's a good thing. You've come through the fire, purified yourself. You are strong, you got through this. No you won't be the same person, so it does feel strange - you are getting used to your new "skin" so to speak. That fire tempered you, now you can take more. It got rid of illusion, false belief, all of that extraneous stuff you simply do not need anymore. Nothing at all wrong with that. You've gone up a level and put away childish things.
Losing Faith Posted August 30, 2009 Posted August 30, 2009 I don't believe you will ever be the same again after a heartbreak. But that isn't a bad thing. It builds character and makes you who you are today. "The only thing constant in life is change"... even without the heartbreak, you will change over time. After 7 months, you've given yourself time to heal. You've learned from your experience and you are different now.... wiser now! One request though, please don't let yourself change to become a bitter person. Change for the better... focus on the good, be thankful for the good things, and move forward from that. There is still a chance of happiness out there. I know I would love to be in love again... just with a better partner next time. So there are lots of good people out there still hoping to find love. I think a lot of us here would love to find love again... we're just a little more leery of it now. Change for the better and you'll be fine!
soheartbroken Posted August 30, 2009 Posted August 30, 2009 I hope not. To come out of this ordeal unchanged would be a shame. I hope I'm growing in empathy, learning to listen better to others, loving and appreciating my family and friends even more. I hope that I don't take my next relationship for granted...if I even have one. UGH I actually feel that people who have never had their hearts broken are missing something...this is truly an eye opening experience.
Amalie Posted August 30, 2009 Posted August 30, 2009 It's been 11 months for me since my heart was brutally destroyed after a 15 year relationship. You are doing well if you've killed hope! Hope is the hardest part. I know exactly what you mean when you say you don't feel like yourself. Everything is jaded. Your steps are heavier. Your smiles are more thought out. Laughs are less laughy. Sleeps are less restful. Decisions are more difficult. Happy times seem a tad less happy. The world seems a little more sick and twisted. Pain doesn't hurt quite as much. Perfection seems less important. Nervousness doesn't exist. Movies seem a little more silly than funny. Patience is a little less. Meaningless conversations seem a little more annoying. Kindness doesn't come as readily. A whatever will be will be attitude takes over. My spirit is damaged more than anything. It's my spirit that's missing.
soheartbroken Posted August 30, 2009 Posted August 30, 2009 Amalie: I hope your spirit returns given a little more time. 15 years is so long, no wonder you've become jaded. I'm really sorry about what you must have gone through. Do you have a thread somewhere?
Losing Faith Posted August 30, 2009 Posted August 30, 2009 Amalie, my heart goes out to you. I can feel your pain. Wow... 15 years. I can't imagine the pain your feeling. Please keep talking to us. I see that was your first post.
RedDevil66 Posted August 30, 2009 Posted August 30, 2009 No, you'll never be the same, you'll be better. I've grown and become much stronger with every pain in my life.
RedDevil66 Posted August 30, 2009 Posted August 30, 2009 It's been 11 months for me since my heart was brutally destroyed after a 15 year relationship. You are doing well if you've killed hope! Hope is the hardest part. I know exactly what you mean when you say you don't feel like yourself. Everything is jaded. Your steps are heavier. Your smiles are more thought out. Laughs are less laughy. Sleeps are less restful. Decisions are more difficult. Happy times seem a tad less happy. The world seems a little more sick and twisted. Pain doesn't hurt quite as much. Perfection seems less important. Nervousness doesn't exist. Movies seem a little more silly than funny. Patience is a little less. Meaningless conversations seem a little more annoying. Kindness doesn't come as readily. A whatever will be will be attitude takes over. My spirit is damaged more than anything. It's my spirit that's missing. hugs It took me a solid yr to get over my 11 yr relationship. But the good news was, my spirt came back, but came back stronger and happier. You'll do ok, I promise. Us Canadian girls are tough I tell ya :-)
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