who is the real loser?

[bonsei]

am I a loser? am a victim of lies and deception, he lied to me and others too, or who is the real loser?

[samsungxoxo]

He is off course.....

[TaraMaiden]

What you have lost, is fleeting and transitory.

But as a person who perpetuates his own suffering, he is a long-term loser.

[LucreziaBorgia]

No one is a winner in an affair. There are only different shades of loss and disappointment.

[bentnotbroken]

My situation, my children were the real losers.

[HUFI]

No one is a winner in an affair. There are only different shades of loss and disappointment.

 

As the guilty party in my A, I agree with the above statement. No one in this mess is entirely a winner or loser, its just one big murky shade of gray.

 

There was a posting i ran into that had different versions of " we win in this affair if this happens" and since the thread had posting from all sides of the affair triangle, you can inmagine that it had winners who were losers who were winners.

 

Whether the MM ends up with W or OW or whatever combination, each one loses something in this process, whether is honor, trust or any of the other hundred emotions that get tied up in a Gordian knot in these affairs.

Yes, at times, people come out of this stronger but the winning takes a lot of heartbreak and tears first.

 

It seems when a heart is broken, it only hears the loss of the past and it cares not yet for the win of the future. Today, I am the loser as I have lost my wifes trust and confidence. Today, she is the loser as she has lost the " special love" that she once had. Today I win because she said that she still loves me. Today, she wins because I told her to read my posts.

 

winners, losers, its a matter of what day, what feeling, whatever...

[tami-chan]

The one who is more emotionally vested than the rest-if we are talking about pain.

 

I think you have to define what you mean by "loser".