stepka Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 OP, I've been reading some of your other posts and you mentioned that you're practically starving yourself to be as thin as the 18 yo. Maybe your clothes are hanging too loose, or maybe you have such a warped self image that you don't respond to positive attention. I'm saying these things kindly--if this rings true with you, maybe it's time to see a doc--you sound like a nice lady who is depressed. You are way too young to stop being attractive to men--I'm fifty and I get some attention, but when I'm depressed about myself, it seems like I get a whole lot less. Maybe it's the way I carry myself or maybe I'm really not as attractive, but whatever the reason, it certainly seems to have a lot to do with my mood. Anyway, I'm reading your posts as a cry for help, but all I can do is urge you to go see someone and get this straightened out, esp if you're suffering from an eating disorder. If you won't do it for yourself, do it for me, ok?
dreamergrl Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 OP, I've been reading some of your other posts and you mentioned that you're practically starving yourself to be as thin as the 18 yo. Maybe your clothes are hanging too loose, or maybe you have such a warped self image that you don't respond to positive attention. I'm saying these things kindly--if this rings true with you, maybe it's time to see a doc--you sound like a nice lady who is depressed. You are way too young to stop being attractive to men--I'm fifty and I get some attention, but when I'm depressed about myself, it seems like I get a whole lot less. Maybe it's the way I carry myself or maybe I'm really not as attractive, but whatever the reason, it certainly seems to have a lot to do with my mood. Anyway, I'm reading your posts as a cry for help, but all I can do is urge you to go see someone and get this straightened out, esp if you're suffering from an eating disorder. If you won't do it for yourself, do it for me, ok? That's what I said. You're inner feelings really reflect on your outter image. You put it twenty times better! Nice post!
carhill Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 LOL at the 50's. My favorite era. When women had curves and torpedo bras and corselets were the rage. OP, take this blouse and wear a nice lace bra underneath where it naturally shows through a bit, match up a gray pencil skirt and some low pumps along with a nice pearl necklace and minimal makeup and you'll get a good idea of what women like my mom wore every day, to work or the grocery store. Conservative sexy. Of course, times and tastes have changed but good conservative feminine attire never goes out of style. You can bet your life my dad wouldn't have kept coming back to the store my mom worked at to buy suits and eventually ask her out on a date if she had been looking like a farm girl who just got off the tractor (even though that's who she was in her past life). It's about presenting your authentic self; who you are right now, today. What do you want?
Isolde Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 LOL at the 50's. My favorite era. When women had curves and torpedo bras and corselets were the rage. OP, take this blouse and wear a nice lace bra underneath where it naturally shows through a bit, match up a gray pencil skirt and some low pumps along with a nice pearl necklace and minimal makeup and you'll get a good idea of what women like my mom wore every day, to work or the grocery store. Conservative sexy. Carhill, your taste is amazing (though for younger women, I'd not recommend low pumps, rather peep toe heels or higher pumps) It's weird, some 50s outfits look really frumpy but others are very sexy, esp. if you have an hourglass figure.
carhill Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 My mom was 5'6" and modeled clothing in the 50's, mainly print ads. She had that hourglass figure, even after having me. I still have some of the really high quality stuff she owned from that era and tried to keep it as new. Given the way she has declined with dementia, it was one small way of paying respect to who she was. There are also a lot of dress styles from the 40's and 50's which still drive fashion today. Vintage clothing has quite a following. Sexy is in the eye of the beholder. Thank goodness for variety (of tastes and preferences). I hope the OP finds her fit.
caramel c Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 My mom was 5'6" and modeled clothing in the 50's, mainly print ads. She had that hourglass figure, even after having me. I still have some of the really high quality stuff she owned from that era and tried to keep it as new. Given the way she has declined with dementia, it was one small way of paying respect to who she was. There are also a lot of dress styles from the 40's and 50's which still drive fashion today. Vintage clothing has quite a following. Sexy is in the eye of the beholder. Thank goodness for variety (of tastes and preferences). I hope the OP finds her fit. Thats awesome. I would love to see some of those clothes.
carhill Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 LOL, about all that's left are the coats and a few dresses. My stbx got rid of most of the stuff when we were cleaning out my mom's house. She didn't share my respect for the past or generally for my mother, hence the change in marital status, for a number of reasons. The OP appears to have departed, but I'd like to say that, when a person owns their style and really believes in it, and themselves, it sends out signals to people who are or can become beneficial in that person's life. This is part of my potential theory. There are multitudes of potentials for each of us, whether for life partners or for friends and colleagues, and our job is to clearly signal them with our authentic demeanor, personality and style. If we mask our true selves, we risk missing them entirely. Well, it's a theory anyway
caramel c Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 Oh carhill thats too bad. I would do just about anything to get a hold of those clothes!
carhill Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 If you're into vintage, PM me. There are a couple of forums where you can connect with people to trade authentic items and get period patterns to make your own duplicates. My mom made a lot of clothing herself from patterns. I still have her sewing machine and some of that stuff. It's all in boxes. Before my wife and I split up, I noted the resurgence of 70's clothing, as my wife is into all aspects of fashion. IMO, not the best period for clothing LOL. I just look at my senior picture and cringe
caramel c Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 If you're into vintage, PM me. There are a couple of forums where you can connect with people to trade authentic items and get period patterns to make your own duplicates. My mom made a lot of clothing herself from patterns. I still have her sewing machine and some of that stuff. It's all in boxes. Before my wife and I split up, I noted the resurgence of 70's clothing, as my wife is into all aspects of fashion. IMO, not the best period for clothing LOL. I just look at my senior picture and cringe That's so funny. I am interested, as soon as I become an established member I wil pm you. I am hoping to pull off a Jackie O costume for Halloween. I do resemble her (face and figure) so I think this will work out quite well as long as I have the right dress and accessories. Sorry for hijacking this thread.
carhill Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 Not at all. Jackie was a great example of a very conservative style which was timeless, feminine and sexy. This was very much a style emulated by women of my mother's generation. Jackie was a trend-setter. If this is how you feel, and it speaks to you, it's your authentic self.
caramel c Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 Not at all. Jackie was a great example of a very conservative style which was timeless, feminine and sexy. This was very much a style emulated by women of my mother's generation. Jackie was a trend-setter. If this is how you feel, and it speaks to you, it's your authentic self. No doubt this is how I feel. That is why I am very excited to find the perfect ensemble
stepka Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 Before my wife and I split up, I noted the resurgence of 70's clothing, as my wife is into all aspects of fashion. IMO, not the best period for clothing LOL. I just look at my senior picture and cringe LOL, I can just imagine since I'm the exact same age. You probably had a lot of hair, but at least the 80's feathered bangs weren't in yet. I remember that I was trying so hard to be a hippie back then--what a goal!
carhill Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 Oh, for the love of sideburns LOL. And, yeah, I had a ton of hair, literally. Private school mandated the cut but it was there. caramel c, google 'fedora lounge powder room'. I think you'll enjoy yourself. I learned a lot about underpinnings there. Period underwear (for ladies) is an interest of mine
caramel c Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 Oh, for the love of sideburns LOL. And, yeah, I had a ton of hair, literally. Private school mandated the cut but it was there. caramel c, google 'fedora lounge powder room'. I think you'll enjoy yourself. I learned a lot about underpinnings there. Period underwear (for ladies) is an interest of mine LOL, this is lovely thank you!
carhill Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 My pleasure. The ladies will take very good care of you. It's a great example of being clear about what image you wish to present and just going about it, without regard to general opinion. It's being 'you'. Enjoy
LucreziaBorgia Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 I hate to say it, but the only women who are going to get away with wearing conservative or comfortable and still attract men are ones who are hot to begin with and have decent bodies.
Author MissJoness Posted August 29, 2009 Author Posted August 29, 2009 I hate to say it, but the only women who are going to get away with wearing conservative or comfortable and still attract men are ones who are hot to begin with and have decent bodies. so you're just going to come in here and try to subliminally say that I am not all that pretty? well thank you for making me feel better about myself. I thought this forum was about building people up and not tearing them down
Vet Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 so you're just going to come in here and try to subliminally say that I am not all that pretty? well thank you for making me feel better about myself. I thought this forum was about building people up and not tearing them down Oh, get over yourself. This forum isn't for pointless pity parties either. That's obviously what you're seeking here, as you've created no fewer than five threads basically saying the same thing--"Poor me". Grow up.
carhill Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 OP, do you want men who are attracted to body parts like hips, tits and butts? It seems your methodology, if this is your goal, is failing. Hence, try making changes. Or, if your goal is to attract men who value other aspects of yourself, continue to proceed as you are and place yourself in circumstances where such men would likely exist. As an aside, other than one elderly lady, all the people I saw grocery shopping this morning were men, in various stages of 'comfortable' dress. The elderly lady, OTOH, had nice pants and blouse, necklace and earrings, sharp minimal makeup and her hair done. Well done. She got a second glance from me. Her husband is likely very appreciative (she had a wedding ring on) So, OP, find yourself reaching for something up high at the store and you never know who will be watching and/or interested and/or helpful
Pink Cupcakes Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 Uh, no, when I wear a business suit and put on glasses, I get more male attention than ever,lol. Ever heard of the sexy librarian fetish. uh, yeah.
Pink Cupcakes Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 I hate to say it, but the only women who are going to get away with wearing conservative or comfortable and still attract men are ones who are hot to begin with and have decent bodies. Nah. Not true. Men like women who dress nice. If you do the best with what you've got, you'll get noticed. I sense bitterness. Cheer up.
LucreziaBorgia Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 so you're just going to come in here and try to subliminally say that I am not all that pretty? well thank you for making me feel better about myself. I thought this forum was about building people up and not tearing them down What on earth are you talking about? Why would you think I was talking about you? I'm hardly bitter. Just realistic.
caramel c Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 Oh, get over yourself. This forum isn't for pointless pity parties either. That's obviously what you're seeking here, as you've created no fewer than five threads basically saying the same thing--"Poor me". Grow up. lol @ get over yourself
deux ex machina Posted August 29, 2009 Posted August 29, 2009 so you're just going to come in here and try to subliminally say that I am not all that pretty? well thank you for making me feel better about myself. I thought this forum was about building people up and not tearing them down Um. It certainly seems you are feeling more than a little down on yourself? You do know that is no one's responsibility, do you not? * Miss Jones - fit is so important when it comes to clothing looking great. Wearing conservative clothes with a bit of edge helps. It's something you can get an eye for, if you have the aesthetic sense to envision what "works" well for you. Conservative can be very sexy indeed. More sexy than showing a lot of skin. If done right. A suggestion? Go to a higher-end store and seek out a stylist to help you. A great stylist can make all of the difference. This is what their career, doing this sort of thing - take advantage of this service. I've never known any to charge for it. And never forget: fit is the biggest thing. It can make or break a look. Good luck.
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