georgejungle Posted August 28, 2009 Posted August 28, 2009 I'm a HUGE people pleaser and I worry about letting people down. my wife, my mother, my friends, etc. i'm 32 I find it hard making decisions for fear it'll hurt someone's feelings. I'm not a blubbering ol' wuss. I do have a spine. But when it comes to the people I cherish most, i try and do all i can to be there for them. Even if it means being at two different places at the same time. I suppose I get it from my Mother. She works so hard to try and please my Grandmother and will drive 2 hours just to take her to her Doctor's apointment even though she's got sisters that live in Granny's same city that can take her. I've seen my Mom exhaust herself to get things done or be there for her sisters, much of which goes unnoticed by them. I inherited this gene. Anyway, I just want to be able to say NO to things and not feel bad about it. I want to be able to say "No Mom, we can't drive down this weekend because it's just going to be too hot with Baby in the car for 2-1/2 hours and it's too late in the evening. I want to be able to accept people's offers to do things for me or offer to help me out and not feel like I'm putting them out. They offered, right? But i'll dissect it and turn it into "Do they REALLY want to help or are they feeling obligated to help me?" I'm a worrysome fellow.. i hate it. Any advice or books i can read?
Thaddeus Posted August 28, 2009 Posted August 28, 2009 Read Dr Robert Glover's No More Mr Nice Guy. There's also a website and discussion group similar to this one.
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