johncraig Posted August 28, 2009 Posted August 28, 2009 OK, a bit of advice from the ladies please. Short background. 35 y/o male, have a six year old boy and just finished a three year relationship. I frequent a coffee/bagel show 1-2 times a week for over a year and there's a cute woman who works there. For the past two months, we've had friendly conversation. I asked her name and she would only provide her first name and phone number. So we started texting each other. It started out casual and I found she was in a relationship and seemed a bit hurt still so I wanted to just start slow and not ask her out right away. After a few weeks of texting she really turned up the texting. She'd text Hi, good morning, say she'd like to do things together (shopping, etc). I really enjoyed it and was beginning to dig her. Then it kind of cooled off. She'd reply to texts however the frequency dropped off. I decided to ask her to lunch/dinner and she said she'd like we were getting to know each other, becoming friends and dinner was a go. We set a dinner date for two weekends away (we were both busy until then) and she wanted to option to decide on Friday or Saturday of that weekend. I said no problem. We were texting last weekend and I asked if she knew Friday or Saturday was better. She again said if she could decide later. I again said no problem. I stopped by the coffee shop the following Tuesday, got a bagel and coffee. We chatted a bit, but didn't discuss our supposed upcoming dinner. We chatted the next day, again just small talk. Here's the situation: it's now the weekend we are supposed to have dinner and I've heard nothing. The last 3-4 text conversations we've had I've initiated. So what should I do with this situation? Ignore her and move on? Contact her? Wait for her to contact me? Any insight would be great. Thanks.
Vet Posted August 28, 2009 Posted August 28, 2009 OK, a bit of advice from the ladies please. Short background. 35 y/o male, have a six year old boy and just finished a three year relationship. I frequent a coffee/bagel show 1-2 times a week for over a year and there's a cute woman who works there. For the past two months, we've had friendly conversation. I asked her name and she would only provide her first name and phone number. So we started texting each other. It started out casual and I found she was in a relationship and seemed a bit hurt still so I wanted to just start slow and not ask her out right away. After a few weeks of texting she really turned up the texting. She'd text Hi, good morning, say she'd like to do things together (shopping, etc). I really enjoyed it and was beginning to dig her. Then it kind of cooled off. She'd reply to texts however the frequency dropped off. I decided to ask her to lunch/dinner and she said she'd like we were getting to know each other, becoming friends and dinner was a go. We set a dinner date for two weekends away (we were both busy until then) and she wanted to option to decide on Friday or Saturday of that weekend. I said no problem. We were texting last weekend and I asked if she knew Friday or Saturday was better. She again said if she could decide later. I again said no problem. I stopped by the coffee shop the following Tuesday, got a bagel and coffee. We chatted a bit, but didn't discuss our supposed upcoming dinner. We chatted the next day, again just small talk. Here's the situation: it's now the weekend we are supposed to have dinner and I've heard nothing. The last 3-4 text conversations we've had I've initiated. So what should I do with this situation? Ignore her and move on? Contact her? Wait for her to contact me? Any insight would be great. Thanks. You've already asked twice, so that's really it. Ignore her, and wait for her to contact you. Contacting her again and bugging her about it is going to come off as being needy and perhaps annoying. If she doesn't initiate it by this weekend, it's done.
butcher's hook Posted August 28, 2009 Posted August 28, 2009 She's in a relationship, of course she will be unreliable she reports to someone else you and your plans with her clearly are not her priority. Move on, why would you want to get involved with someone already involved with another man?
loveslife Posted August 28, 2009 Posted August 28, 2009 It's really not a good idea to expect someone who is cheating on their partner to be reliable.
Author johncraig Posted August 28, 2009 Author Posted August 28, 2009 She's in a relationship, of course she will be unreliable she reports to someone else you and your plans with her clearly are not her priority. Move on, why would you want to get involved with someone already involved with another man? Let me clarify she WAS in a relationship and seemed to be on the end of getting over him. As far as I know, she's not in one now.
butcher's hook Posted August 28, 2009 Posted August 28, 2009 Let me clarify she WAS in a relationship and seemed to be on the end of getting over him. As far as I know, she's not in one now. Bet you he is still in the picture. Even if he is not, she is probably mostly flattered you are interested but that's about it. I would seriously move on. Either way she is showing your she is not ready for any sort of dating, she can't even keep a dinner date commitment.
Author johncraig Posted August 28, 2009 Author Posted August 28, 2009 Bet you he is still in the picture. Even if he is not' date=' she is probably mostly flattered you are interested but that's about it. I would seriously move on. Either way she is showing your she is not ready for any sort of dating, she can't even keep a dinner date commitment.[/quote'] That was my take on it. Plus, it's poor manners to leave someone hanging. Unless there's a great reason for the delayed communication, I'm done with her.
Recommended Posts