Milky Posted August 28, 2009 Posted August 28, 2009 Hi all I've been lingering here ever since I got the shock of my life from my GF. I seriously need some help. I met my GF October 2004, we hit it off good, however we were quite different people and broke up about 3 times in the space of 3 months! We sorted out our differences and since Feb 2005 have had an amazing relationship. We moved in together (bought a flat) in July 2007 and living together has been fantastic, never had many arguments or problems. Anyway May 2009 she decides to change her birth control due to spotting problems, this is where the problems start. Our sex life became non existent and she became very tired all the time, eventually this lead to all intamecy declining to the point of only kisses and hugs. Along with this she became very emotional, stress of work, lack of friends, it seemed she was becoming mildly depressed! We planned to go on holiday mid August, 2 weeks before she told me how excited she was and how much she loved me. Anyway 1 week before she became very distant, upset etc, then she dropped the bombshell on how she loves me, but is confused! I kid you not, this girl adored me, loved me, wanted me forever. We went on holiday and had a good time, but she was still distant. She's never been a good communicator of problems (this stemmed from lack of family communication), so getting her to speak about problems is a nightmare. Im finding my whole world is collapsing around me, I havent got the slightest idea of what to do! Do I stay at home with her and show I am there with her all the way, do I move out and give her space!? She has also gone to the Doctors and changed her Birth Control pills as we're both sure this has something to do with it. I need some help here people, my emotions are all over the place, Im crying, not sleeping, not eating, I just dont know what to do anymore! Thanks people
mickleb Posted August 28, 2009 Posted August 28, 2009 The wrong Pill can definitely take you over. I started getting daily migraines when I had a particular type (that I am still not really free from). I stopped taking it 14 years ago.. Please try to stick with your gf whilst she tries some different medication. Actually, I would consider she try something completely different (like the coil - or you could just wear condoms, of course) , as it can take a while to find the right Pill and she is clearly susceptible to hormone changes. You sound like a really wonderful guy and I think this is definitely worth holding on to. It may take another six months before her hormones level out but, of she was completely into you before, she will come back. I think that moving out could make things worse (from a woman's perspective). She may feel you've abandoned her when she, really, needs you most. She DEFINITELY sounds depressed. I would advise that you both go to couples counselling whilst you are dealing with this. Try to get her to go - she may find it easier to open up with the help of a therapist. You could use someone to talk to, also. If your relationship was good until she started taking this Pill, I'm convinced that's where the trouble lies. Please try to bear with this situation whilst she gets this sorted out. The very best of luck to you. You're a sweetheart. Take care. xxx
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