blazinak Posted August 28, 2009 Posted August 28, 2009 Okay so i am dating a girl and i thought everything was fine since lately she has been acting funny. Today she says she loves me but she doesnt want to hurt me later, i asked her what that meant and she said to me that she thinks that things are hard for her right now and in a couple of months her ex-boyfriend is coming back and she doesnt want to make things awkward for me because she still is friends with him and wants to hang out. She says she isnt sure if she wants a relationship right now and things that i would make a really good friend. Ive told her there is no way i am going to be her friends because i love her too much to be just that. I did cry in front of her and she tried to comfort me saying that she still loves me and wants to take care of me and help me get through it just like a friend would. Why do women always try and do this crap to us nice guys?.. Anyways..she said she wants the weekend to think about things and that nothing has happened right now. So should i prepare for the worst? (probably) Any advice on how to prepare for it and get over it? I spend most of my days with her so when im not with her im either at work or wishing i was with her.. when im alone i feel like it and dont really do much.. Sorry about the title, it just cut out on me but it was Just need some advice/help.
EricaH329 Posted August 28, 2009 Posted August 28, 2009 Okay so i am dating a girl and i thought everything was fine since lately she has been acting funny. Today she says she loves me but she doesnt want to hurt me later, i asked her what that meant and she said to me that she thinks that things are hard for her right now and in a couple of months her ex-boyfriend is coming back and she doesnt want to make things awkward for me because she still is friends with him and wants to hang out. She says she isnt sure if she wants a relationship right now and things that i would make a really good friend. Ive told her there is no way i am going to be her friends because i love her too much to be just that. I did cry in front of her and she tried to comfort me saying that she still loves me and wants to take care of me and help me get through it just like a friend would. Why do women always try and do this crap to us nice guys?.. Anyways..she said she wants the weekend to think about things and that nothing has happened right now. So should i prepare for the worst? (probably) Any advice on how to prepare for it and get over it? I spend most of my days with her so when im not with her im either at work or wishing i was with her.. when im alone i feel like it and dont really do much.. Sorry about the title, it just cut out on me but it was Just need some advice/help. Oh honey, I really really really feel for you. I would most definitely expect the worst. I am not going to sugar coat this. What you are about to go through is going to be extremely painful. Please know this though, you are an amazing person with or without her. If she feels as if this relationship isn't going to work for one reason or another, it's best to get it over with now as opposed to later on down the road after you've invested much more time and effort into the relationship. I am proud of you for telling her that you cannot just be friends with her, and I really hope you stick to your word. Being friends with her will cause a lot more damage than good, and you'll prolong getting over her. Know that you will be ok without her. It will take some time to heal, but I promise you.. you will get over this. We all do. Please keep us updated. We will be more than happy to help you get through this. Keep your head up.
Beeotch Posted August 28, 2009 Posted August 28, 2009 This girl sounds like she might have been on the rebound with you unfortunately. In that, she has not gotten over her ex, still wants him but was using you while he was not around to get her mind off of him. She might care about you or even like you a lot...but perhaps likes her ex more. From what she is saying about her ex and him coming back and wanting to hang with him and not wanting to hurt you....seems that is what she is saying, that she wants to reconcile with him or she is interested in him as more than a platonic "friend".... I think you should give her that freedom to "explore her options"....and not sit around while she picks and chooses and all that. You deserve someone who WANTS to be with you for certain. I think she is just trying to save face by saying she will "think about it over the weekend"...I am sure she is not going to think about a thing and her decision has already been made. Don't foolishly fall for it or allow her to mess with her ex and perhaps if he doesn't want her back she magically comes back and realizes she wants a relationship with you . It is HARD. I know. It is easy to just ignore the red flags and the ill-treatment because we love this person or want a relationship, but usually in the end it comes back to the same thing. So I would much prefer to walk away now and endure that pain and get over it than allow someone who does not make me a priority but an option, to run in and out of my life until they leave me high and dry forever.
Author blazinak Posted August 29, 2009 Author Posted August 29, 2009 right now sucks and i feel alone not talking to her and this weekend just started.. its hard to keep my mind on other things, and i just keep hoping everything will be fine and nothing bad will happen but still i get that feeling that something bad is going to happen..and usually when i get that im right.
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