mnm Posted August 26, 2009 Posted August 26, 2009 I did it! We talked last night and asked him for the truth about the EA. And he told me. Of course he glossed over the emotional part of it on his end, but mainly we talked about the questions that I had about when they met, the times I thought they were together, any physical relationship, and all that. He was open because I approached it the right way. He assured me nothing was physical, he wasn't attracted physically (if you'd seen her pictures you'd understand). He was lost, I was lost, we were lost and things were so bad between me and him that she was there and understanding. He said mostly they talked about their individual situations (apparently she is at least bisexual, would have to be to be sexting with him). I've been married to this man for almost 14 years and can tell when he's lying, and he wasn't, maybe glossed over a few points, but answered my questions with honesty and respect and no degradation. I felt better because the scenarios in my head were so much worse than the truth and told him that. The best part was that he told me that he loves more more than he ever has, has better appreciation for me and our marriage and will continue to work as hard as I to make us a stronger couple. He also told me that he wasn't patient enough with me when I was unstable. I was on the wrong kinds of medicine and had an IUD that turned me into an mental wreck. He told me he should have been more understanding and should have realized that that was not the real me and I would get back to my old self. He was also disgusted with himself because he hadn't worked in over a year and wasn't providing for his family and cashed out on all of us. He apologized again for hurting me. I know I'll probably get a lot of flak for accepting him at his word, but at the same time, no one is here in this relationship, doesn't know us personally or what we went through. Trust me, though what he did was in no way justified, just knowing that he wants to work it out as much as I do means a lot. Thank you for all of your sound advice and counsel. I feel so much better.
redtail Posted August 26, 2009 Posted August 26, 2009 Kudos to you Mnm, sincerely! I'm so glad things worked out and continue to get better. Life is good...
Author mnm Posted August 26, 2009 Author Posted August 26, 2009 It is. I realized last night just how much I mean to him and vice versa. It was a bad time and now I can move forward even more.
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