Lauriebell82 Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 I was having a convo with my friend today regarding combining bank accounts before getting married. Thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lauriebell82 Posted August 25, 2009 Author Share Posted August 25, 2009 There have been many discussions about this on here. There's no right or wrong on this one. It's whatever works for each couple. That said, we do combine..always have. It works best for us. We are both fairly conservative and 99% of the time agree on how money should be spent so it's not a problem. I can see separate accounts if one person isn't as good with money as the other one. Yeah, I just did a search and found a ton! My friend was telling me that she just opened a joint with her boyfriend who she recently moved in with. I'm thinking it may be easier to pay for wedding stuff and save for a house with a joint bank account. Fiance is always saying that "what's mine is yours" so I was pondering the idea of whether or not to suggest it. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 Easy to do after. I wouldn't do it before. Personal preference YMMV. Simple method is joint for common household expense (mortgage/rent, utilities, etc), based upon an agreed-upon budget and contribution, and separate accounts for each person so they can manage their own budgets as they see fit. TBH, I've met too many secret spenders in my lifetime to be trusting in the financial area. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lauriebell82 Posted August 25, 2009 Author Share Posted August 25, 2009 Easy to do after. I wouldn't do it before. Personal preference YMMV. Simple method is joint for common household expense (mortgage/rent, utilities, etc), based upon an agreed-upon budget and contribution, and separate accounts for each person so they can manage their own budgets as they see fit. TBH, I've met too many secret spenders in my lifetime to be trusting in the financial area. Yeah, the difference is that we don't have a joint anything, I write him checks for the bills and he pays them. I mean it works for now, I'm thinking it would be easier to just have one account though, esp. since we are getting married and view it as "our money." Link to post Share on other sites
laRubiaBonita Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 my husband and i each have separate accounts and a joint account.... it works. Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 What Touche said- no right or wrong answer. We pool all our money, and have done since we came back to this country- most of the expenses we have (mortgage, food, cars etc) are joint. I keep all my business expenses separate. Only thing about doing it this way is you need to be careful about resentment if one of you earns more. If everything is joint, then its joint- any big purchases need to be discussed with eachother, and if you are the one that is putting more in the pot, it doesn't automatically mean that you get to spend more on yourself than the other one. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lauriebell82 Posted August 25, 2009 Author Share Posted August 25, 2009 Easy to do after. I wouldn't do it before. Personal preference YMMV. Simple method is joint for common household expense (mortgage/rent, utilities, etc), based upon an agreed-upon budget and contribution, and separate accounts for each person so they can manage their own budgets as they see fit. TBH, I've met too many secret spenders in my lifetime to be trusting in the financial area. What does YMMV stand for? lol Link to post Share on other sites
laRubiaBonita Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 What does YMMV stand for? lol your money managing views? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lauriebell82 Posted August 25, 2009 Author Share Posted August 25, 2009 your money managing views? HAHA, maybe! I didn't even think of that! Anyway to respond to sb: Fiance makes double what I do, however basically my salary will go to saving a downpayment for a house. There will be a lot to save too because we make a pretty good combined income. Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 PS meant to add we agreed that we both have personal accounts that receive an agreed on amount each month for our personal spending. Any surplus is saved or put on our mortgage. We have done some pretty heavy duty budgeting this year- we needed to to buy our house, and now I am having 4 months off work to have a baby we have had to examine it again to avoid getting into debt. But thats us. And despite the budgeting etc I would be lying if I said we had never had a "discussion" about money. (usually about the size of the grocery bill) LB- if your system working for you then, it works for you. Personally, I prefer to do all my banking electronically and would get really annoyed at having to write cheques all the time. I don't even have a cheque book. You could always open a joint account and each pay a set amount each month into it, and set it up to pay all your joint expenses from that. Then all you would have to worry about is the one transaction transferring your money into that account, but you would still retain your personal account for your own spending. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 What does YMMV stand for? lol YMMV = your mileage may vary = your experience may be different than mine Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 LB- we did that too when we were saving for a wedding and down payment for our house. We lived on Hs income and saved all of mine less the "allowance" amount for personal spending. It soon adds up. You just need to be really honest with eachother and have the discipline to stick to your plan- its really easy to fall out of the swing of regular saving, esp when you "borrow" from the savings account and don't put it back. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lauriebell82 Posted August 25, 2009 Author Share Posted August 25, 2009 PS meant to add we agreed that we both have personal accounts that receive an agreed on amount each month for our personal spending. Any surplus is saved or put on our mortgage. We have done some pretty heavy duty budgeting this year- we needed to to buy our house, and now I am having 4 months off work to have a baby we have had to examine it again to avoid getting into debt. But thats us. And despite the budgeting etc I would be lying if I said we had never had a "discussion" about money. (usually about the size of the grocery bill) LB- if your system working for you then, it works for you. Personally, I prefer to do all my banking electronically and would get really annoyed at having to write cheques all the time. I don't even have a cheque book. You could always open a joint account and each pay a set amount each month into it, and set it up to pay all your joint expenses from that. Then all you would have to worry about is the one transaction transferring your money into that account, but you would still retain your personal account for your own spending. Yeah I plow through checks like crazy! I have disney checks too (I know I'm a dork) and he is always embarrassed to cash them! We considered that, but decided against it because we get paid at different times during the month so it would be complicated to try to pay all the bills if they are due at a time when there isn't enough money in there. He also puts all the bills under his account and they all electronically come out according to when he gets paid. That's why I just ended up writing him the checks because it would be less hassle and discussions. Having a combined bank account would be essentially the same thing we are doing now except I would not be writing a million checks because my money would already be in there. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lauriebell82 Posted August 25, 2009 Author Share Posted August 25, 2009 LB- we did that too when we were saving for a wedding and down payment for our house. We lived on Hs income and saved all of mine less the "allowance" amount for personal spending. It soon adds up. You just need to be really honest with eachother and have the discipline to stick to your plan- its really easy to fall out of the swing of regular saving, esp when you "borrow" from the savings account and don't put it back. We both have money saved, but I think we could save more if we saw it all in a lump sum at the end of the month and put it away. Did you have a combined account before getting married? Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 Having a combined bank account would be essentially the same thing we are doing now except I would not be writing a million checks because my money would already be in there. Exactly. Either that or you could set up an automatic payment to his account so he can pay the bills that way (and avoid the disney cheque dilemma?!) Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 Yes we did, but it was after we got engaged. Made paying for wedding expenses easier too. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lauriebell82 Posted August 25, 2009 Author Share Posted August 25, 2009 Exactly. Either that or you could set up an automatic payment to his account so he can pay the bills that way (and avoid the disney cheque dilemma?!) I like to give him the Cinderella checks lol. (I have Ariel, Snow White, Beauty from Beauty and the Beast, Jasmin, Cinderella) I could do the automatic payment thing, I didn't even know I could do something like that. (Maybe our bank doesn't do that?) Yes we did, but it was after we got engaged. Made paying for wedding expenses easier too. Yeah, thats what I was thinking as well. He got a raise the other day too and he came home and I congratulated him. He reminded me that WE got a raise. It was sweet. So far we have been like "okay who is going to pay for this, who is going to pay for that." (of the wedding) Link to post Share on other sites
hotgurl Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 Exactly. Either that or you could set up an automatic payment to his account so he can pay the bills that way (and avoid the disney cheque dilemma?!) that is what I do. We have a joint account for household expensies so I have a certain amount taken weekly that goes into this joint account then the payments are taken electronically. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lauriebell82 Posted August 25, 2009 Author Share Posted August 25, 2009 Yes we did, but it was after we got engaged. Made paying for wedding expenses easier too. The only thing that I would wonder is how you deal with personal spending. Like do you see everything your H buys and vice versa? Link to post Share on other sites
hotgurl Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 Also we have our own personal accounts where the rest of our check is deposited. I have a student loan still and we both have our own car payments and retirement accounts. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lauriebell82 Posted August 25, 2009 Author Share Posted August 25, 2009 We see everything the other buys. It's all there on the credit card bills, receipts, etc. Is that ever a problem? Do you give each other like a set amount of spending money each month? Neither my fiance and I are huge spenders, we buy personal stuff but probably about the same amount. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lauriebell82 Posted August 25, 2009 Author Share Posted August 25, 2009 Hmm, I figured out a way for spending personal money. Each other us gets a set amount of money each month (the same amount) and we can spend that money on whatever we want, any amount, anytime out of that set amount of money. We just save the receipt and use a spreadsheet to add up the spending money each week. Link to post Share on other sites
Enema Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 We've been together 7 years or so, married for 1.5 No joint account, we both work full time and don't plan to have children. Works for our situation. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lauriebell82 Posted August 25, 2009 Author Share Posted August 25, 2009 We've been together 7 years or so, married for 1.5 No joint account, we both work full time and don't plan to have children. Works for our situation. So how do you pay the mortage/rent or bills? Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted August 25, 2009 Share Posted August 25, 2009 My wife and I have separate businesses and also have/had separate finances. I took care of the mortgage and other home-related expenses (utilities, taxes, insurance, etc) and she handled health care, food and sundries, clothing and entertainment. It worked out pretty well. We each handled our own auto-related expenses, since I had/have many more vehicles than she. I fixed everything but she bought her own parts. Like I said upthread, YMMV. Your situation will be unique to you Link to post Share on other sites
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