BigBubbs Posted August 24, 2009 Posted August 24, 2009 My girlfriend and I broke up a few weeks ago after I refused to accept that she always threatened to end the relationship. I finally developed a spine and said fine if you want to go go! And she went (sucks but what can you do)! I've had next to no contact with her since except one text she sent me about her things (BTW I didn't reply to it). The hardest part for me day to day now is not checking up on her myspace, facebook, dating site etc etc. I know she is already on an online dating website and that hurts as I feel totally forgotten already. I haven't checked anything for a week now but I still am fighting the temptation several times a day to check up. I know that No Contact includes these things but I'm looking for helpful things I can do that will help me not cave in. It hurts now even though I know I did the right thing but I need some motivation to stay strong and not look in on her life via these methods as I feel it will damage my recovery time. I'm looking for any thoughts, experiences, and suggestions.
GrayClouds Posted August 24, 2009 Posted August 24, 2009 The hardest part for me day to day now is not checking up on her myspace, facebook, dating site etc etc. . Your just picking at the sore, it may make you feel better for a period, but worst in the long run. You know what to do so do it and take care of yourself.
DustySaltus Posted August 24, 2009 Posted August 24, 2009 I hate to say it but she was looking for a way out. The fact that she's on dating websites a few weeks later really shows that she checked out a while ago. It takes a little bit of an effort to set up those things and who knows how long it was there for? She was baiting you and baiting you to break up with her because she felt guilty. I think you are off to a good start with the NC (although I don't know how you found out about the dating website). You need to continue on with it and when you feel like you are about to break, keep repeating the things in your head that she did to you that made you upset. That's not love what she did to you, it's childish and you don't need that.
silic0ntoad Posted August 24, 2009 Posted August 24, 2009 I hate to say it but she was looking for a way out. The fact that she's on dating websites a few weeks later really shows that she checked out a while ago. It takes a little bit of an effort to set up those things and who knows how long it was there for? She was baiting you and baiting you to break up with her because she felt guilty. I think you are off to a good start with the NC (although I don't know how you found out about the dating website). You need to continue on with it and when you feel like you are about to break, keep repeating the things in your head that she did to you that made you upset. That's not love what she did to you, it's childish and you don't need that. I second this. Dude, I deleted my myspace and fb. I am a strong advocate AGAINST SN Websites. Cut her loose.
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