DustySaltus Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 How have you handled deleting your ex's friends and family even if you got along with them very well? Do you just cut the cord completely...especially if they are in another country? Or do you leave it be? Are her friends still trying to gather "intelligence" on me? Man, I'm confused.
silic0ntoad Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 How have you handled deleting your ex's friends and family even if you got along with them very well? Do you just cut the cord completely...especially if they are in another country? Or do you leave it be? Are her friends still trying to gather "intelligence" on me? Man, I'm confused. Dude... f*ck it, cut the cord. My ex's best friend used to haunt my myspace page. Told the squib about me taking her dog for surgery. It drove me batty! So, I deleted all the pics, and all the info, and shut the page down. Haven't looked back since. I don't do Facebook. It's hogwash. Honestly, dude, I wouldn't delete them. I'd delete myself.
joseffrost Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 I have an unpopular take on this that is rarely echoed across LS - I'm still friends with her and her family on FB, but mainly because I rarely go on there so the risk of me seeing something that will upset me is minimal. Also, I know that somewhere down the line, I will be friends with her, once the hurt fades, and her family were always good to me, so for me it would be a petty act. Every situation is different man, do what you have to do.
Darren09 Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 Yeah dude delete everything...... Its so good not having to go on facebook just to have your heart ripped out... Cause they always put good things up there just for the sake of it! i deleted all her family all her friends just to make sure there was no way of her getting to me. You feel so much better when you have done it trust me
N.Colony Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 That's petty. You can put them on your limited profile or something, but deleting them is extreme. If the pain is that extreme, maybe you can delete as much as you want. But for me, I'll just let it be.
bluewolf17 Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 I deleted all the friends and blocked him. Haven't looked since and don't care too. No reason to stay friends with his friends or family-all of that was just a extension of a relationship that is OVER. No hard feelings, they will understand. On a side note, my roomate told me he is still friends with all of my friends on FB and on Myspace (I cancelled my Myspace after we broke up, got on FB, then he followed..but that's another thread). In the end, it doesn't matter. Personally, keeping them as "friends" or whatever you want to call it, is just another way for them to keep tabs on you and vice versa. And why would you want your ex to know anything about you? They lost that right.
CaliGuy Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 I say delete them. Keeping in contact with an exes family just delays your healing.
silic0ntoad Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 I say delete them. Keeping in contact with an exes family just delays your healing. I agree- but I deleted mine so I would have no reason to get curious and snoop. It's something I had to do for myself. I don't like networking sites anyway. All these people knowing exactly what you're up too...
Author DustySaltus Posted August 21, 2009 Author Posted August 21, 2009 I was on the facebook site last night and her nephew sent hello to me, he's 15. I treated this kid like his was my nephew already, after all we were engaged. He has no idea what's going on. He's an awesome pool player, a prodigy if you will...I play as well, so I used to practice with him and just look out for him in general. That's going to be the hardest one for me delete because I know I genuinely care for the kid.
silic0ntoad Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 I was on the facebook site last night and her nephew sent hello to me, he's 15. I treated this kid like his was my nephew already, after all we were engaged. He has no idea what's going on. He's an awesome pool player, a prodigy if you will...I play as well, so I used to practice with him and just look out for him in general. That's going to be the hardest one for me delete because I know I genuinely care for the kid. Then don't delete him. Sometimes, it's easier to disconnect yourself then to cut others off. Delete you, I did... I'll never have a FB or a Myspace. LOL. I am such a hater. Didn't you say something about haterade yesterday? HAHA
Author DustySaltus Posted August 21, 2009 Author Posted August 21, 2009 Then don't delete him. Sometimes, it's easier to disconnect yourself then to cut others off. Delete you, I did... I'll never have a FB or a Myspace. LOL. I am such a hater. Didn't you say something about haterade yesterday? HAHA Lol, everyone is a hater in some shape or form, it's perfectly normal. I used to see a real ugly dude with a hot girl and be like wtf??? Now, I'm like you know what? Good for Him. I'll figure this facebook nonsense out and come to some sort of conclusion.
silic0ntoad Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 Lol, everyone is a hater in some shape or form, it's perfectly normal. I used to see a real ugly dude with a hot girl and be like wtf??? Now, I'm like you know what? Good for Him. I'll figure this facebook nonsense out and come to some sort of conclusion. Lol, I'm the same way anymore. It's a tough thing, to be so intertwined with people. But it's the best for you to sever all ties and leave it go, right mate? No choice in the matter. That's been decided for you.
Beeotch Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 Haven't really had to do that.... The only person of my ex on my list is his bestfriend...and he doesn't use it that much and his activities don't bother me. I want to delete my ex....I sort of feel bad cuz even tho he has a new girl, there are pics of me and him on his page still and even on myspace altho she is number one I am his #4 fave....so I know he has not gone about deleting me from his life. He doesn't use it that much anyway so he doesn't bother me much.....but especially since I am on this high and I truly feel resolved that I am done with him I kinda juss wanna delete him.
free2bme4u Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 I deleted his family but some of our mutual friends I kept. If a 15 Y.O. wants to be your friend on facebook, and you genuinely like the kid, he doesn't have to be deleted. If anything, let him delete you later on. Then there are no hard feelings. Its all hard to do, but I won't delete myself.
adamt Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 That's petty. You can put them on your limited profile or something, but deleting them is extreme. If the pain is that extreme, maybe you can delete as much as you want. But for me, I'll just let it be. It is not petty or extreme. It is for the best. I know if i was a dumper and my ex took me off i would not be offended or upset because i woul dknow they are tryiung to get over me.I blocked my ex and not fussed if she was bothered because at this stage it is all about helping me get over her. Every little bit of info i see about her on facebook just plays havoc with my memories and imagination.
aboynamedmike Posted August 22, 2009 Posted August 22, 2009 FB and Myspace can get way outta hand. People spend so much time on them editing their profile and such. I was at a Blink 182 concert and it was crowded as hell and I saw these girls taking pictures of themselves in the crowd..and then scream, "omg! this is my new profile pic!" lol It's nuts... But anyway, on my facebook, I just ask myself, "am i really friends with this person?"..and if yes, then I keep em, if not...sorry buddy haha
adamt Posted August 22, 2009 Posted August 22, 2009 Well i blocked my ex on facebook about 6 weeks ago. Then today was the first time we came in contact in a crowd. She saw me twice tonight( i didnt look direct at her). Then it goes through my mind that she wouldnt come over and talk because i blocked her and she thinks i am ignoring her. But then you have to think back to why you had to block your ex. You want to move on. You just cant risk undoing all that hard work. Keep you self on the straight and narrow road.
CaliGuy Posted August 22, 2009 Posted August 22, 2009 Well i blocked my ex on facebook about 6 weeks ago. Then today was the first time we came in contact in a crowd. She saw me twice tonight( i didnt look direct at her). Then it goes through my mind that she wouldnt come over and talk because i blocked her and she thinks i am ignoring her. But then you have to think back to why you had to block your ex. You want to move on. You just cant risk undoing all that hard work. Keep you self on the straight and narrow road. Smart words, Adam. The reason you blocked her is because as much as you love the people who leave you, you also realize that at some point you have to say "enough is enough" and move on with your life. They're moving on (and having fun!), so why shouldn't you?!
Taucher Posted August 23, 2009 Posted August 23, 2009 I deleted my ex and everyone I knew through her. Some of her friends became good friends of mine too but I am sure they understand. Me and my ex had no mutual friends as we did not belong to the same group before we met, if you see what I mean. The weird thing was, when I deleted my ex, she got kind of mad at me for doing it. She didn't understand it at all and ranted at me on the phone saying that I didn't care about her or anything. She left me! No looking back for me now. I have a whole bunch of new Facebook friends so I am keeping it for now. T
openbook08 Posted August 24, 2009 Posted August 24, 2009 I agree- but I deleted mine so I would have no reason to get curious and snoop. It's something I had to do for myself. I don't like networking sites anyway. All these people knowing exactly what you're up too... agreed, i did the same! and remember no-one posts on these sites 'having a **** day, my boyf is lazy and called me a cnut tonight what'll i do??' its all 'look how fantastic my life is', 'look at me and my bf posing so happily and in love at lucys wedding' (nothin about him passing out from drink and leaving you for most of the night) excuse me while i dont.
Author DustySaltus Posted August 24, 2009 Author Posted August 24, 2009 I'm learning that facebook can be a useful tool when dating new women as well, bear with me: I reconnect with a girl who is a family friend. She always seemed a little sketchy but I gave her the benefit of the doubt. We spoke on the phone and she said we needed to set up a date for next weekend because this weekend she had to go to a funeral for a co-worker. I said ok. Next thing you know this girl is updating her facebook status...."change of plans, front row seats to a baseball game". Man, if this isn't the red flag of red flags, I don't know what is. At that point, what does the barber always say?.........NEXT!
adamt Posted August 24, 2009 Posted August 24, 2009 After our indirect contact in a crowd on saturday, i was struggling on sunday. Feelings were coming back, imagination running wild wondering what she was doing and thinking. Found it hard to think that someone of 3 years would treat you like a stranger. Point is any kind of update, indirect information or indirect contact can set you back. That is why it is so important to block them on facebook. you are not doing it to get back at them but you are doing it to get over them quicker. You are fooling you brain into thinking they do not exist anymore, but as soon as new information about them turns up it triggers stuff again in your brain. Bit like an old sports injury that flares up if you get a kick on it. I blocked her and made the mistake of unblocking her. I could only see her photo but it did make and impact and i felt like crap rest of the day even though i blocked her 5 minutes later. The temptation is still there but the pain it brings will always stop me from looking again. I use this idea to stop myself from emailing or texting her. THen once you are fully over them and possible with a new partner then you can offer to be friends again. Thats if you are bothered anymore.
jgaz3124 Posted August 25, 2009 Posted August 25, 2009 I am going through the same thing right now. I want to block or delete my ex's profile as I feel to really move I must do this or I will be on the sight daily checking for information that only gets my heart to beat faster and makes me nervous, clearly not a good reaction. So it is hard but I think I might delete him. Now if I could just get myself to press the damn delete button!!!!
AmySmith Posted August 25, 2009 Posted August 25, 2009 After i deleted my ex as a friend, he, in what i believe was retaliation, and perhaps out of respect for his new rebound, deleted and untagged all pictures of us together. i am still tagged in all our pictures and have not deleted any pictures of us. i feel kind of weird about it, and don't know if i should delete that part of my past or keep my pictures up. what are your opinions regarding pictures of you and your ex on facebook or other social networking sites?
adamt Posted August 25, 2009 Posted August 25, 2009 After i deleted my ex as a friend, he, in what i believe was retaliation, and perhaps out of respect for his new rebound, deleted and untagged all pictures of us together. i am still tagged in all our pictures and have not deleted any pictures of us. i feel kind of weird about it, and don't know if i should delete that part of my past or keep my pictures up. what are your opinions regarding pictures of you and your ex on facebook or other social networking sites? If you cant handle it take them off. Infact take them off as you are not a couple anymore.
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