butterflysil Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 ok i previously posted that my ex fiancee called after a year. as shocking as it was i texted him back. he asked if he could call me i said yes. well we spoke for an hour. i was very curious to why he called. he said that he recently kept thinking of me because he wanted to make peace with his dad so when that went bad, he wanted to make peace with me. i must state this again it is not like him to do this. well he said i know we ended in bad terms and just wanted to tell you i don't think you're a bad person at all. so i said fine we can be friends. i asked him if he wanted to hang out. he heistated but i convinced him. so we went out for drinks it was all fun. than i asked him what his girl situation was, he said he has been seeing someone for six months. i over drank at that point and told him i missed him and still loved him. well we went to his place considering i was the driver and he had to drive now. i was so drunk somehow we ended making out. than we talked he told me he fell in love with her and out of love with me. still being drunk and him sober we ended up sleeping together. i asked him what this all meant he said all these feelings came back and now he's confused. than he told me that he feels he could fall back in love with me. i love him so much but it hurts that he is still considering seeing this girl.
Lyssa Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 All this talk happened under the influence of alcohol? I don't think a person can fall out of love for someone and then, all of a sudden fall back in love with that person...
Author butterflysil Posted August 21, 2009 Author Posted August 21, 2009 yes i was the drunk one he was the sober one. that is a good point they can't fall back in love, but does that me he fell out of love if he still has feelings?
Quest Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 If it was me, I'd back off. He's the one who's confused - you know that you still care. If he really has feelings for you he knows where you are, and that you're interested. But I'd get on with my own life - you've no guarantee at all that he's going to drop this other girl.
Lyssa Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 yes i was the drunk one he was the sober one. that is a good point they can't fall back in love, but does that me he fell out of love if he still has feelings? I wouldn't read too much into that part. Most people will end up making out when they are drunk (one of them or both). Thing is, he's confused now after the whole making out thing - not good. I wouldn't want to get attached to someone who is "confused".
vivrantflo Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 Very hard situation for you to be in. I understand that you love him, but you're setting yourself up for major pain here. This guy should have called a cab and went home, the second he dropped you and your car off.. but instead he stayed, and ended up cheating on his woman. So he's showing you what he can possibly do to you, if he ends up dating you again, and then going to visit this other lady at her place after having drinks. Him telling you this.. than we talked he told me he fell in love with her and out of love with me. Should make you run for the hills. Just because you guys had sex that im sure you both enjoyed very much, doesn't mean he can fall in love with you again. Im not saying that he can't, but wow, the risk you're taking is huge, cause if he decides to stay with his woman (which im sure he's going to do) you're gonna feel terrible all over again. And say he does decide to leave her, and be with you again... are you not going to wonder how much contact he'll have with this woman that he JUST told you that he's fallen in love with? Do you not think he's gonna want to see her? Especially if she asks him out for drinks just to talk? It just seems like this situation has the potential to be messy, especially now that he's a cheater. And no one wants to see you get hurt. What I think you should do, is walk away. He has to be the one to end his current relationship, and persue you like crazy. You don't deserve anything less.
utterer of lies Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 ok i previously posted that my ex fiancee called after a year. as shocking as it was i texted him back. he asked if he could call me i said yes. well we spoke for an hour. i was very curious to why he called. he said that he recently kept thinking of me because he wanted to make peace with his dad so when that went bad, he wanted to make peace with me. i must state this again it is not like him to do this. well he said i know we ended in bad terms and just wanted to tell you i don't think you're a bad person at all. so i said fine we can be friends. i asked him if he wanted to hang out. he heistated but i convinced him. so we went out for drinks it was all fun. than i asked him what his girl situation was, he said he has been seeing someone for six months. i over drank at that point and told him i missed him and still loved him. well we went to his place considering i was the driver and he had to drive now. i was so drunk somehow we ended making out. than we talked he told me he fell in love with her and out of love with me. still being drunk and him sober we ended up sleeping together. i asked him what this all meant he said all these feelings came back and now he's confused. than he told me that he feels he could fall back in love with me. i love him so much but it hurts that he is still considering seeing this girl. He was horny and got some sex. He doesn't want to go exclusive with you, but wants to keep you as an option for more sex. But you are too attached to him. Break off any contact, you will only get hurt. And don't ever think the whole evening wasn't premeditated.
Author butterflysil Posted August 25, 2009 Author Posted August 25, 2009 honestly i know i have to ignore him. i just really wish he never called in the first place. it felt like i was fine than slam.
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