silverbunny Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 so about a month ago my best friend and her boyfriend decided i should meet his cousin (he is 21, i am 20). we started talking and things went great so i drive 2 hours to hang out one night. the four of us double date at a nice resturaunt, go to a movie, and i come home. there was no kissing/hugs involved. the next week i have the night off of work and decide to go down to see him again. we go out to eat, go bowling, and then end up at my best friends house. the guy and i snuggle on the couch and made out for a little while. in the morning, i walked him to his car and we hugged and kissed good bye. the following week he planned to come see me. i had everything ready. at noon he says he has to stop at home (sort of on the way) and says he'll be a little later than he expected. two hours later, i get a text saying he can't make it because he told his parents his plans for the weekend (to come see me) and they said we were going to be getting too serious too fast. he said he was sorry and he sounded sincere. he was like "i'll come see you on my weekend off and i'll stay the whole weekend". my best friend and her boyfriend wouldn't pair me with someone who would screw me over. they know he is a good guy. BUT before you jump to conclusions, there is more to this parents involvement thing. i find out the next day that the reason he went home was to discuss his financial budget with his family. apparently he got himself into some debt and said he is going to work lots of hours the next few months to get himself out of debt. he also said he's giving up drinking (since he just turned 21 about 2 weeks ago). he's also in the navy and does the whole once-a-month weekend deal. THEN i also find out that he's sort of self-conscious about himself. he told his cousin (my best friends boyfriend) that he wants to work out and get in better shape. he hasn't texted me in a LONG time. like almost 5 days. i don't want to text him either because i feel like he should make this first contact. the boyfriend has asked me if im mad at this guy (which im not). he's also asked me if im coming home this weekend (which is odd because he never asks me stuff like that). i've talked to my best friend about this and she's pretty much agreed with my actions - waiting this thing out for about 2 weeks and let him text first. what i don't get is why he stopped talking to me. does he think im mad at him because he couldn't make it?? is he embarassed that he's having some difficulties right now?? what do you think...
Thornton Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 Don't play games. If you like him, text him - he might be sitting at home also thinking you're lost interest in him. Perhaps the guy feels that he isn't in a position, financially or otherwise, where he can begin a relationship... or perhaps he's lost interest... who knows. Stop torturing yourself and just text the guy, then you'll know where you stand, and you can either have peace of mind or move on.
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