borbiusle Posted August 20, 2009 Posted August 20, 2009 I dated a girl for 6 months. Went on vacation for a month to visit my sick mother, I come back, everything seems fine the night I go to her place. She goes on a trip to her brother's wedding, comes back and says she doesn't have feelings for me anymore, is "confused", and depressed about her dad dying of cancer(which we've talked about since we've started dating). She said she's confused about everything. I've flat out asked her numerous times if she wants to end the relationship, I never get a yes or no. Finally she tells me she feels that the "spark" in our relationship is gone and that she felt this way 2 weeks prior to me going on vacation. I assumed I was being dumped and that most likely she found a new guy while I was away(she has BIG trust issues to boot), which she denies(of course ). I went NC for a month. I get a txt from her about a week ago, her asking me to "be friends" and that she "misses talking to me". She once again denies that another guy is involved . I haven't responded to anything from her but it's kind of been plaguing my mind for a bit. I don't want to be just friends but at the same time, I'm not sure how to handle this....
BCCA Posted August 20, 2009 Posted August 20, 2009 Dude, ignore that crap. You dont want to be her friend, and she lied to you. She is not confused, she is selfish, and wants you to wait the bench while she plays the field. Unless she says she wants to make things right and start another relationship, you dont want to deal with her drama. She hasnt said that yet.
boogieboy Posted August 20, 2009 Posted August 20, 2009 She doesnt miss talking to you, she just wants to keep tabs on you. She wants to make sure you havent moved on yet. DOnt acknowledge anything she says. She is going to keep trying to bait you into validating her with a reply. As long as you dont answer her, it will drive her nuts emotionally, which is what she deserves for lying to you. Youre already doing the right thing by ignoring her.
caramel c Posted August 20, 2009 Posted August 20, 2009 Under no circumstances are you to accept this friend request.
CaliGuy Posted August 20, 2009 Posted August 20, 2009 I dated a girl for 6 months. Went on vacation for a month to visit my sick mother, I come back, everything seems fine the night I go to her place. She goes on a trip to her brother's wedding, comes back and says she doesn't have feelings for me anymore, is "confused", and depressed about her dad dying of cancer(which we've talked about since we've started dating). She said she's confused about everything. I've flat out asked her numerous times if she wants to end the relationship, I never get a yes or no. Finally she tells me she feels that the "spark" in our relationship is gone and that she felt this way 2 weeks prior to me going on vacation. I assumed I was being dumped and that most likely she found a new guy while I was away(she has BIG trust issues to boot), which she denies(of course ). I went NC for a month. I get a txt from her about a week ago, her asking me to "be friends" and that she "misses talking to me". She once again denies that another guy is involved . I haven't responded to anything from her but it's kind of been plaguing my mind for a bit. I don't want to be just friends but at the same time, I'm not sure how to handle this.... What she is saying is "I want all the benefits of being in a relationship with you, without being in a relationship with you." If you're ok with that, by all means, be her friend.
Vet Posted August 20, 2009 Posted August 20, 2009 You weren't friends to begin with (you were romantic interests), so why does she think that a friendship can just blossom out of nowhere?
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