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Guys, how big of a turn off is this?


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Posted

Last night I made my bf dinner at his place.

 

We've been dating 1.5 yrs - I've never cried or been super moody or emotional.

 

I almost never PMS, but when I do, it can be pretty bad. HARDCORE PMSing right now - emotions were all out of whack and uncontrollable yesterday.

 

Anyways, after dinner he was joking around like he usually does, but I was feeling SUPER sensitive and getting annoyed and hurt and mad about it. And HE could tell I was getting annoyed and being sensitive, which pissed HIM off.

 

I FINALLY STARTED SOBBING AND CRYING like you would not believe. Which also annoyed him because it was kinda out of no where (I never cry, and it's not like he was saying anything so bad or anything).

 

So he was comforting and stuff, but I could tell he was still kinda "ew" about my sensitivity.

 

Didn't cuddle at all last night (weird, cuz he always spends the entire night with his arms around me, until I wiggle out - he is a HUGE cuddler), but then this morning he seemed OK and was super cuddly again.

 

I'm so embarrassed and feel so uncomfortable about last night though. I'm also upset because my behavior detracted from me doing something nice for him.

 

How do I recover?

How big of a deal is this?

How much of a turn off is it?

Posted

Going out for a year and a half and this is the first time?????? This is grrrraaaaand!! I get this once a month with my girlfriend. Yeah its a turn off but seriously- he's a guy, we all kinda collectivly know that sometimes women will get emotional and go nuts! Fact! But if its the first time in a year and a half-he's on to a winner with you in this department, trust me!

Posted
How do I recover?
"Sorry that I was hyper-sensitive last night, sweetie. It was PMS but I ended up taking it out on you, even though it had nothing to do with you." (Then give him a hug/kiss.)

How big of a deal is this?
No big deal if it's a one-off. If it's a common occurrence then he might see it as a red flag (no pun intended) but if it's a rare event to go over-the-top emotional whilst PMSing, I wouldn't give it much thought.

How much of a turn off is it?
See above.
Posted

How do I recover? - in my opinion, nothing to recover from

How big of a deal is this? - not a big deal....if he has had other gf's then he is probably thankful that this happens so rarely.....most of my gf's are like that at least once a month

How much of a turn off is it? - sounds like he was ok in the morning so not a long lasting turnoff

 

 

 

I would say not to worry about it

Posted

Recover - Tell him you were PMSing. It's the catch all excuse women can use and most men know better then to ask any more about it. That way he'll also knew (if he doesn't already), that it's very untypical of you.

 

Not a big deal AT ALL. If I was him, it wouldn't cross my mind again after a day or two.

 

Temporary turnoff would be about a 5/10. I wouldn't let it bother you. Women are all nuts at times, everyone knows that.

  • Author
Posted

I apologized last night (despite crazy behavior, I knew how I was being), said I was PMSing...he was still mad :laugh: Probably can't blame him.

 

Wasn't sure if I should bring it up again since he seemed OK this morning.

 

Glad to hear it doesn't seem to be that big of a deal...guess I'm the one who needs to get over it :p

Posted

To be perfectly honest , if this is the only time you have exposed him to your genuine problem of PMS craziness.....

 

You should demand not only that he not be irritable about it but that he give you a reward.

 

Kidding aside, you have to honest about it and tell him up front how he can help you deal with it in the future.

Posted

You've been dating for a year and half. You have nothing to worry about.

Posted

Unless you do that all the time, what is the big deal.

Posted
"Sorry that I was hyper-sensitive last night, sweetie. It was PMS but I ended up taking it out on you, even though it had nothing to do with you." (Then give him a hug/kiss.)

No big deal if it's a one-off. If it's a common occurrence then he might see it as a red flag (no pun intended) but if it's a rare event to go over-the-top emotional whilst PMSing, I wouldn't give it much thought.

See above.

 

THIS!

 

If your boyfriend is still mad at you after this, that's really sad. My current gf doesn't "PMS" at all, but she realizes there are occasions when she gets a little hyper-emotional. When that happens she usually apologizes immediately. In her case, I think she's just afraid that I'll think this type of behavior is "typical" for her, and that I'll love her less because of it.

 

Pretty much the opposite though, because she never takes her emotions out on me at all, and when she is being hyper-emotional, I know that something is causing things to be a little out of whack, and I'd never hold it against her.

 

I still think it's sweet that she apologizes for it though. I guess it just makes me feel lucky because it shows me how nuts she is about me. ;)

Posted
How do I recover?

give him really good sex

 

How big of a deal is this?

not a big deal at all

 

How much of a turn off is it?

if you implement my recover plan the turn off will be zero

Posted

Frankly, if a guy dates a biological woman (as opposed to transgenders and such :p) chances are he WILL have to deal with at least some level of PMS... because it's a biological fact. As long as you try to control it, don't abuse it and make sure he knows it's just hormones and totally not his fault, you really shouldn't feel bad about it. Especially if it just involves crying. We all need a good cry at times, sometimes there doesn't even need to be an immediate reason, just a really bad couple of days or pent-up stress and emotions. If a guy can't handle that (he seems to have handled it reasonably well IMO, maybe you're reading too much into the cuddling that night?) then he should try a non-biological woman. :p

Posted

Ah, good girl!! :) A year point five in and this is the first breakdown? You've really been playing your cards right, haven't you? I think we belong in the same category. :)

 

Well, you beat me. I went for a full 7 months before MY first emotional PMS meltdown, which is still good but not anywhere near as impressive as your record!

 

Don't worry about it. If he's ever dated any girls beside you (which I'm sure he has) he has been expecting this. I'm sure he's probably VERY surprised at your sanity. So I'm just going to end this reply with a KUDOS and a thank you from one non-crazy woman to another!

Posted

It's not a turn off at all.

Men get PMS too of sorts, not every month, but occasionaly our testosterone levels drop and we can get moody etc. too.

Don't take any **** from anyone about PMSing.

It's natural and It shouldn't bother your partner at all.

  • Author
Posted

*Big sigh of relief*

I was just so horrified by my behavior...I guess it's pretty typical (sounds like), but definitely a new experience for me!

 

Good advice 2sure, I think next time I'm feeling that way I'll have to let him know not to joke around and stuff.

Posted

yeah, just be forthright with him -- I was PMS'ing, and I'm sorry about that. Then ask him how he is, and do something that he would like to do...be it watching sports, going out for beers, or a BJ.

 

Or all three, in that order.

  • Author
Posted
yeah, just be forthright with him -- I was PMS'ing, and I'm sorry about that. Then ask him how he is, and do something that he would like to do...be it watching sports, going out for beers, or a BJ.

 

Or all three, in that order.

 

:lmao: He got steak and a...*ahem...something else already that night!

Posted

NA, If your BF has had any experience with women at all, he should be aware of monthly mood swings. Just tell him that you PMS hard, and leave it at that. He'll get over it. Especially if you're really good at the "AHEM".:laugh::laugh:

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