silic0ntoad Posted August 19, 2009 Posted August 19, 2009 I 100% trust in my gut instincts. It hasn't been wrong so far. The only times that I've had problems, are when I've ignored it or tried to rationalize it away. Your gut feelings have been honed over thousands upon thousands of years of mankind. It's there for a reason so use it wisely. TBF- we agree on this. That's good. I always trust my gut instincts. My intuition has NEVER done me wrong. And I would call BS on self fufilling prophecies. That's such a crap line.
Trialbyfire Posted August 19, 2009 Posted August 19, 2009 TBF- we agree on this. That's good. I always trust my gut instincts. My intuition has NEVER done me wrong. And I would call BS on self fufilling prophecies. That's such a crap line.I think you have to grind down to what's real gut instinct and what's strictly negative emotional over-reaction, due to past experiences. Perhaps that's the confusion? I don't know.
borbiusle Posted August 19, 2009 Posted August 19, 2009 I grew up in a poor, bad neighborhood in Brooklyn, NY, 22 years later, not a scratch on me. I trust my gut with my life, sadly it's right 99% of the time. Back in my early days of dating when I stalked an ex-girlfriend or 2 for evidence of cheating because of a gut feeling, it was always right. Call it paranoia, a "sixth" sense, whatever it is, it's doing its job for me, I can spot bull**** from a mile away.
deux ex machina Posted August 19, 2009 Posted August 19, 2009 Gut feelings are what happens when your brain processes lots of different information and events and this comes out as a "gut feeling." There has been scientific research about this and it has been explained as a survival mechanism. The brain quickly goes over the information and goes "Aha, this is...." so you dont even have to think about it. Yep. A heightened state of pattern recognition. The reticular activating system plays a role in this. Self-examination is in order when the gut feeling is a strong one, as it's easy to fool ourselves. So it's worth asking yourself if there's a true basis for that feeling, or is the strength, the pull simply justifying/compelling toward a fear or a want you have in the first place.
Author Bobby2010 Posted August 21, 2009 Author Posted August 21, 2009 are you going off of words or actions? big difference - the action will be the true indicator... the words can lead you to be suspicious... if they aren't aligned - it usually triggers me to look more closely at what is really going on. words are meaningless if the action isn't showing what the words are saying. Words. I confronted her a dozen times about her strange new behavior. Each time I was told nothing is wrong, which dumbfounded me. The behavior continued. CONSTANT texting, ridiculously long work days, constant crankiness towards me etc... YOU JUST KNOW after being with someone for so long if something is amiss. After a few months of this she left me and was immediately in a new relationship with a co-worker, who she now lives abroad with.
CaliGuy Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 I have a million stories but almost always when I had a gut feeling, it was dead accurate. Trust your gut and your head, not your heart. The heart lies.
GrayClouds Posted August 21, 2009 Posted August 21, 2009 I have a million stories but almost always when I had a gut feeling, it was dead accurate. Trust your gut and your head, not your heart. The heart lies. Heart does not lie, it just exaggerates the truth...just like the ex!
JLT123 Posted August 22, 2009 Posted August 22, 2009 I honestly don't know how to handle what I'm feeling right now. The head is telling me that I am better off and to move on, the heart is telling me that I still am madly in love with her, and my gut is telling me that she's either not happy with the new guy, or either not with him anymore, and because she said so many horrible things to me the last time we spoke, she's not willing to get in contact with me because she's afraid of what I will say.
sunshinegirl Posted August 22, 2009 Posted August 22, 2009 My gut instinct about things being wrong or 'off' somehow has never been wrong, but I have been very bad about heeding it. I'm learning now to absolutely trust that little nagging feeling. The times when I've thought an ex was going to come back? I don't call that gut instinct; that's wishful thinking, and I have usually been wrong about stuff like that. But the 'warning' voice? Dead on accurate. Not at all a self-fulfilling prophecy - because as I said, I used to ignore or downplay what my gut was telling me, and things still went to pot. Gut instinct: a finely tuned, sub-conscious alert system.
Nikki Sahagin Posted August 22, 2009 Posted August 22, 2009 I do believe in gut feeling but I think its more that when you know someone so well you can feel and notice the change when they start to pull away, act distant, cuddle you less, have less time. I think there's no real way to disguise that. You can't really NOT notice someone distancing themself from you. But when people PRETEND everythings fine and say the same words with the same smiles and the same actions, thats when people get blindsighted. I had a 'gut feeling' both times when my ex dumped me. He also used to give mixed messages. He would sometimes stop giving me cards and presents, othertimes i'd have them, sometimes he would be so affectionate, othertimes a cold fish. Its a very painful thing to go through when someone you care about so much gives the green light and then the red...but I think we are all guilty of that sometimes. I think whats more hurtful is just thinking it crossed his mind that I was irritating or too much work or too frustrating to be with. The moments they pull away you start to think, once you couldn't get enough of me, and now we can't wait to run away! But people are funny creatures! I guess its kinda like eating your favourite meal 3 or 4 times a week every week for a few years...until one day you've just had it so much you've gone off of it and just never want to see it again!
beesue Posted August 23, 2009 Posted August 23, 2009 That seems to be the same problem I've been having lately. My boyfriend cheated on me. And I knew something was wrong. Of course you have the visual signs and watching his behavior change, but then before you notice any of this you do get a gut feeling. That is what made me watch for his behavior to change, and low and behold it did. Now that I've experienced these feelings (like a huge knot in my stomach, almost making me sick. Or extremely anxious out of the blue for no apparent reason) I know something is not good/right is going on. My bf and I got back together, and I didn't have those feelings any more for quite some time, but now they've come back and it's time to get to the bottom of things. I asked him to show me his phone bill and he turned white...I'll keep you updated, but as far as gut feelings go in my particular case,,,,,they haven't failed. I also think that some people are a little more intuitive and have a stronger sense of this than other people. I think it just depends on the person really.
icyness Posted August 24, 2009 Posted August 24, 2009 Rarely do I get gut feelings, but when they do occur, they usually end up being right or at least similar to what I thought may happen. Right before my boyfriend left to go back home after visiting me, I had the worst feeling and didn't want him to go through with this program he was going to start. I asked him over the course of a month or so if he was sure he wanted to do it and told him how I felt; I was positive something bad would happen between us if he did. I tried everything I could to convince him not to. He left me after only a few weeks of being there. Now my gut feeling has been telling me he did indeed leave me for someone else..of course a lot of could be paranoia since I really have no way of finding out for sure. It's a bit tough to decipher between being paranoid/convincing yourself about something or an actual gut feeling, but I've found most times if you've got this horrible nagging feeling despite what others may say or think, even yourself..there's probably at least some truth to it.
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