Kamille Posted August 16, 2009 Posted August 16, 2009 Much prefer not taken but have been attracted to taken or semi-taken (separated) guys. Generally, what I find attractive about them has very little to do with their relationship status.
Star Gazer Posted August 16, 2009 Posted August 16, 2009 I think it just has something to do with knowing that someone else values them. Women set the market on men.
tigressA Posted August 16, 2009 Posted August 16, 2009 If I find myself attracted to a guy but then find out he's taken, my attraction definitely doesn't just go away. I would have to undergo a campaign of total avoidance in order to keep it from growing. That usually works. I have a close friend who I dated casually over 2 years ago, and I've always been attracted to him. I hang out with him regardless of his relationship status at any time, but when he's attached I do make more of an effort. I've noticed that he doesn't flirt and that he's less likely to make plans with me when he's attached, which makes him even more attractive because I think, "Oh, he's so devoted to his girlfriend, he'd totally be like that if he were with me..."
CaliGuy Posted August 16, 2009 Posted August 16, 2009 Thanks. I haven't posted this pic for over a year and this time, it's for a number of reasons. Yeah let us know when you're single and available again
silverfish Posted August 16, 2009 Posted August 16, 2009 I don't know about women but in my experience men are much more likely to be attracted to women that are attached... it's a strange thing. For myself, if a man is with someone he goes into the 'does not compute' section of my brain and I have no interest whatsoever. When I was single I was amazed at the tenacity of some men I knew who had partners coming on to me. I have to say though - when I am with someone the quality of men that come on to me is better than when I am single. Maybe it's an 'inner glow' thing.
Thornton Posted August 16, 2009 Posted August 16, 2009 I don't necessarily find taken guys more attractive... in fact him being taken would be rather annoying if I fancied him... but if a guy is taken he's attractive because some other woman has deemed him worthy of dating, he already has the seal of approval. If a guy is single you have to wonder what's wrong with him that nobody wants to date him?
Scarlett513 Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 Definetley not more attractive. He stays right about wherever he was in the first place, but falls right off the map as far as I'm concerned, lol.
39388 Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 If a guy is single you have to wonder what's wrong with him that nobody wants to date him? Clearly, everything is wrong with him and he has no good qualities whatsoever.
EddieN Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 I think it's more of a negative stigma associated with single guys than a positive stigma associated with taken guys. When a girl meets a single guy, no matter how handsome or cool he is, she will convince herself that there must be something seriously wrong with him because he's still single. The better the guy, the more it bites him in the ass. With a taken guy, that's the norm. She'll THEN judge the quality of the girlfriend, and if the girlfriend isn't up to par with the guy in her eyes, then she will apply the same logic - there must be something wrong with him because he SHOULD have a better gf based on what he's showing. Either way, it sucks for guys. I know guys don't give a crap if a girl is single or not...in fact, the more single the better.
Citizen Erased Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 Not more attractive. Usually they automatically go in the friend zone.
EddieN Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 I don't necessarily find taken guys more attractive... in fact him being taken would be rather annoying if I fancied him... but if a guy is taken he's attractive because some other woman has deemed him worthy of dating, he already has the seal of approval. If a guy is single you have to wonder what's wrong with him that nobody wants to date him? I rest my case. The problem with this thinking is some guys like myself just don't get to meet females in the first place. It's not that we're not dating because we're seriously messed up in some way, but rather we just don't know anyone to date.
Thaddeus Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 ...if a guy is taken he's attractive because some other woman has deemed him worthy of dating, he already has the seal of approval.That pretty much nails it. Oddly enough, it's even been studied. See The Angelina Jolie effect - why we love married men. From the article:Four times as many (women) were interested in him when they thought he was attached, as were keen on him as a singleton.Part of it might be due to the "you always want what you can't have" effect, and part because he's already passed some sort of 'test' because he's involved.
westernxer Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 One time my brother wore a fake wedding ring and was peppered by questions from a female store employee, after she noticed he was "taken." She ignored me completely. LOL
Citizen Erased Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 One time my brother wore a fake wedding ring and was peppered by questions from a female store employee, after she noticed he was "taken." She ignored me completely. LOL Is he hotter than you?
westernxer Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 Is he hotter than you? I'd rather not find out. LOL
Chicago_Guy Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 I don't necessarily find taken guys more attractive... in fact him being taken would be rather annoying if I fancied him... but if a guy is taken he's attractive because some other woman has deemed him worthy of dating, he already has the seal of approval. If a guy is single you have to wonder what's wrong with him that nobody wants to date him? I don't understand this logic at all, although I do agree that a lot of women think this way. So a guy is "more attractive" if he spends his time dating a woman he doesn't really want rather than remaining single and looking for a woman her really does want? It seems illogical to me...
EddieN Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 I don't understand this logic at all, although I do agree that a lot of women think this way. So a guy is "more attractive" if he spends his time dating a woman he doesn't really want rather than remaining single and looking for a woman her really does want? It seems illogical to me... It almost seems to make sense to have a fake girlfriend in order to dispel this illogical standard.
mammax3 Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 Interesting, this idea of women setting the market for men, and approval stamps. I certainly think it would have to depend on the woman who has the man. Sure, we can all appreciate a goodlooking couple - but if the woman was bossing around the man and being a bitch (and I'm picking on the woman in this example to support my position, could easily go the other way), then I don't think that man's worth goes up just because he's partnered up. I find a partnered man appealing because I know it's not going anywhere, so in that respect perhaps it's attraction (in a sense). I can be silly, mean, smart, funny, deep etc and I don't worry if I'm impressing him, putting him off me, or any of the other internal dialogue that's present when I'm with a person who I'm interested in.
sally4sara Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 I think it's more of a negative stigma associated with single guys than a positive stigma associated with taken guys. When a girl meets a single guy, no matter how handsome or cool he is, she will convince herself that there must be something seriously wrong with him because he's still single. The better the guy, the more it bites him in the ass. With a taken guy, that's the norm. She'll THEN judge the quality of the girlfriend, and if the girlfriend isn't up to par with the guy in her eyes, then she will apply the same logic - there must be something wrong with him because he SHOULD have a better gf based on what he's showing. Either way, it sucks for guys. I know guys don't give a crap if a girl is single or not...in fact, the more single the better. I've never thought of single guys as undesirable. If I were looking for a relationship, I would be very keen on a single guy over a taken guy because I can't date the taken guy. Even if I could date the taken guy, the simple fact that he would have to disregard his GF to date me indicates that he is not a guy I find appealing. The only reason a taken guy is an appealing thing, is he embodies WHAT you're looking for without BEING the one you're looking for. He just represents that what you're looking for exists.
westernxer Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 The only reason a taken guy is an appealing thing, is he embodies WHAT you're looking for without BEING the one you're looking for. He just represents that what you're looking for exists. Ah, an archetype. Clever.
loveslife Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 Not at all. I have had too many experiences with taken men hitting on me. Them being taken is a turn-off for me now. If one of them so much as smiles at me I run the other way. (haha kidding on that last part.) To look at it from a different angle, I know that many people (male and female) are taken just because just don't wanna be alone, not because of a great relationship. So, if a guy is single and busy and comfortable in his independence/solo status, that is a MUCH bigger turn-on. Someone like that is way more attractive to me than a guy who just happens to have a girlfriend or wife. Well, so long as it doesn't go too far in the "I don't need anyone" direction. No interest in forbidden fruit here.
Author Trialbyfire Posted August 17, 2009 Author Posted August 17, 2009 Here's my perspective on this issue: Taken men immediately fall down in attraction level, once I find out they're taken. If someone else has put their stamp of approval on him, he's off limits. It's okay if he flirts, as long as he doesn't cross that line in the sand. The minute he flirts with intent, I don't even want to be friendly with him.
D-Lish Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 It's okay if he flirts, as long as he doesn't cross that line in the sand. The minute he flirts with intent, I don't even want to be friendly with him. Agreed. If a taken man flirts with intent, it's a huge turn off!
Yamaha Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 Single guys need to have a female friend as their "wingwoman" and their worth will go up dramatically ( especially if she's hot ).
White Flower Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 I keep reading this time and again from some of the male posters and am looking for some honest answers from the ladies on LS. Is it true that a man who's taken, is more attractive to you than single men? I have my own theories but am more interested in hearing everyone else's. Nope. Single men can be just as mysterious and intriguing.
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