unknown815 Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 i have been broken up with my ex for a year now..the pain isnt getting much better. we share a 2 year old together. he has a girlfriend for the past 6 months. not sure how serious they are but its killing me. he has hurt me so many time yet i still want to fight for what we had...when it was good. also for our daughter. we are civil/friendly the past few months. even spending time with out daughter together occasionaly which we always have a great time doing. Im so lost. i have tried it all to letters and lil hints here and there and hes just no responding. i havent brought up anything in a while and dont know what to do anymore. I am a good looking girl with no problems meeting people But hAVENT MET ANYONE who i would even consider being in my future. i HATE thats he with someone else. please help..what can i do, anything?? i dont wanna hear just move on..i know thats what i "should" do, but i want HIM!
MrFun Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 he has a girlfriend for the past 6 months....hAVENT MET ANYONE who i would even consider being in my future....i want HIM! Hello????? You're never ever going to get him. You're never going to find anyone with that attitude either. If you sincerely want guidance then do the following: - forget this guy - concentrate on yourself and being there for your child - stop looking for someone right now The reason I say this is, you will be easy prey for unstable people at this moment. They sense your weakness and will eventually drain you and hurt your self-worth which will trickle down to your relationship with your child. You need to be strong right now. And that you can't be when you're longing for the weakest link in the chain, i.e. your ex. Once you've taken enough time, someone will find you. Someone you can actually build a relationship up with, not someone that will currently fill in the void. Only pussies do that, i.e. your ex, who I seriously doubt has dealt with the issues in his life. Sorry for being so direct, I sincerely hope someone else comments as well. All the best....
Author unknown815 Posted August 15, 2009 Author Posted August 15, 2009 Hello????? You're never ever going to get him. You're never going to find anyone with that attitude either. If you sincerely want guidance then do the following: - forget this guy - concentrate on yourself and being there for your child - stop looking for someone right now Well thanks..i am always there for my child..all is do is for her. and i am not looking for someone right which maybe is my problem as well..I just feel so empty. i wish he would wake up but i know im not gonna be the one thats gonna do that. I know the answers i guess..im just so so sad and wish i didnt feel like this
moo Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 As many already know on here, my ex started a relationship before he left me and turned it around by saying "I thought you broke up with me" when I never said that at all. He ripped up my insides and threw this woman in my face. Throughout this time, I have thought about going on dating service websites and finding someone...but I'm sooo fragile right now. I don't need yet another weirdo to bring me down even further. I'm not strong enough yet, nor am I emotionally available. You have to move through the pain. You can do things to make it easier on yourself, such as therapy, finding a hobby, getting involved with an organization that you are passionate about, doing volunteer work, and my favorite, doing crafts. They all help, but still you will have to live through the pain. I want to contact my ex right now and curse him out. I want him to apologize for everything and offer to seek couples counseling with me. But my ex is an a**hole and I'm left with the pain. I've been NC for two consecutive weeks. My ex didn't suffer. He jumped right to another woman. He was dating her within a week after our bad argument. He didn't even acknowledge my birthday..didn't think about me on my birthday...nothing....nothing. It's not fair, but that is the way it is. We are ALL suffering here. We just all have to suffer together until things get better.
MrFun Posted August 16, 2009 Posted August 16, 2009 I know the answers i guess..im just so so sad and wish i didnt feel like this Then you're not looking for guidance, but sympathy. I sincerely do sympathize with you. There are so many in your situation, stick to your guns and follow your head. You're stronger than you think
Dmoney28 Posted August 16, 2009 Posted August 16, 2009 well first off...im not going to pretend i know what your going through, because you have a child together, that makes it 100 x more complicated. However there is no clear and cut answer. He is in another relationship. Like Moo said, all you can really do is try and get through the suffering. I know its not easy. But what else can you do? You have tried your best to get him back...but anything from now will only look like you're begging. And you are a better person than that. I know it hurts...and it sucks beyone belief. But there is nothing you can do but try and get through this. Just stick to your guns...stay strong...and give the apperance you can make it without him...because eventually you can. As long as he see's you in this light..he has no intrest in comming back
Author unknown815 Posted August 17, 2009 Author Posted August 17, 2009 i go out of my way to act friendly. cool calm and collected. i have even hinted that i am seeing someone else. Although i come off this way, i assume he knows the real deal..he has said recently that he is happy in his current relationship although there is a part of him that wants to make it work with me. but he said he quickly gets rid of that thought because there has been so much "negativity" built up towards me and there is this "wall" he has. i mean, he really did a number on me. put me through hell. if anyone should have pent up resentment it would be me. so how come i can let go of it and he cant. Maybe because he just really doesn't love me. He says he wants to continue on this friendly approach we've been doing as to NOt "build up anymore bricks to the wall". him with his metaphors...!!! I have come a very long way but having to see him and be in contact with him for our child makes it very difficult to put it all behind me..Thanks for the replies guys. i know everyone on here is hurting in some way
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