storybooklove Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 I've been working at a small company of 10 people for just over a year now and ever since the first day on the job I have been immensely attracted to one guy, non stop. It's not only the most physically attracted I've been to anyone ever but I also feel as if I'm just pulled to him magnetically in general. I don't know why this is but it seems it only causes me confusion. This guy is the type who tries to keep work friends and social friends separate so its very seldom that I spend time with him outside of work, however we will talk on MSN for hours after work. So we can talk on MSN all the time, but it would be somehow crossing the line for us to do things together as friends. Our relationship has generally grown a lot since we first met and we're the ones we're both closest to in the office. In general he is really nice to me and treats me well but will sometimes do things that go against that and still won't spend much time with me outside of work. I'm confused. What does this mean? Is he just being nice because we work together? Is he maybe having a conflict of his own that he wants to spend time with me but is afraid I might take it to be more (even though its true that I would like it to be, but a romantic relationship with a colleague is a bad idea?) or doesn't want to go back on what he said originally about friends outside of work? I don't understand!
CaliGuy Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 It's pretty obvious that at least for now, he is not OK with having a relationship with you outside the context of work. If you pursue it, you will get hurt. You can't pressure people into a romantic relationship if they don't want it or are not ready. Keep things friendly. If he wants to pursue more, he'll tell you. In the meantime, don't stop your life waiting on him or you could miss out on Mr Right.
Author storybooklove Posted August 15, 2009 Author Posted August 15, 2009 I see your point CaliGuy. I'm not saying I'm really waiting for him and all I really want to begin with is a friendship, which we have - but not in the way I can call him up to go to a movie and he'd be all gung-ho. I just don't understand his actions, I can't read him or where he stands on the whole thing.
itisjccole Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 being happy is not just having a relationship to someone who is really dear to you. just enjoy each moment you are with that person. probably he is not ready for commitment yet or maybe he is waiting for the right timing to say things to you. just enjoy.
Isolde Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 You even admitted there are times when he's not all that friendly to you. Why push things at this point?
Author storybooklove Posted August 15, 2009 Author Posted August 15, 2009 It's not that he's not all that friendly - its more like he's trying to make up for being too nice. Or for all I know it could just be times when he's not having a good day and is cranky. But he never ever treats me disrespectfully or in a genuinely mean way.
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