Cinnamon Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 I have a question to men. Is it OK sometimes inflame men's jealousy? A friend of mine is currently on match.com and she believes that women should demonstrate to men that they are popular and desirable. My question is related to only verbal communication and it is not about cheating. Would it be OK if your GF does the following things to you? How would you feel about them? What would be possible results of doing these things for your relationship? 1. Talk with you about her ex.BFs sometimes. 2. Tell you that she thinks that some other guy looks attractive and hot. 3. Tell you stories of how other men are trying to pick her up everywhere she goes. 4. She flirts with other guys when you are with her. Now the questions about jealousy when you and your date both are on the same dating website. 5. She goes online on the dating website daily. 6. She tells you that many guys are emailing to her and she is popular there. 7. She suddenly puts on her dating profile new hot pictures of herself.
GorillaTheater Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 No problemo. I'd just start dating her sister.
clv0116 Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 It would be a great way to ensure I'm not viewing you as material for an exclusive relationship. If that's your goal, well done.
EddieN Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 1. Talk with you about her ex.BFs sometimes. As long as she knows they're her ex's and now I'm her one and only boyfriend. 2. Tell you that she thinks that some other guy looks attractive and hot. As long as she thinks I'm hotter and comes home with me at the end of the day. 3. Tell you stories of how other men are trying to pick her up everywhere she goes. Same as above. 4. She flirts with other guys when you are with her. This I wouldn't like. No one can control if they're attracted to someone else or if other people are hitting on them. They CAN control how they respond to these people. Flirting with guys just gives them the green light to pursue her further. All in all though, I think purposely doing these things is silly. I wouldn't do any of these things, and I especially wouldn't do them consciously in order to insinuate jealously.
BobSacamento Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 That's just playing games. I honestly support them mostly. Just be prepared for not only jealousy possibly rearing it's head but also a taste of your own medicine
PandaStillLovesBunny Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 I'm with Eddie on this one: flirting with other guys, RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME, is a sign of disrespect. Additionally, I think it takes a really insecure mindset, a spirit lacking in self-esteem, to want to instill jealousy in another person. Ayn Rand called this "social metaphysics:" if you were confident in yourself, you wouldn't have to "keep score--" the only opinions that would matter are your own, and those of the person that you're with. "Look! Other people like me! I must have some kind of worth!"
boogieboy Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 I have a question to men. Is it OK sometimes inflame men's jealousy? A friend of mine is currently on match.com and she believes that women should demonstrate to men that they are popular and desirable. My question is related to only verbal communication and it is not about cheating. Would it be OK if your GF does the following things to you? How would you feel about them? What would be possible results of doing these things for your relationship? 1. Talk with you about her ex.BFs sometimes. 2. Tell you that she thinks that some other guy looks attractive and hot. 3. Tell you stories of how other men are trying to pick her up everywhere she goes. 4. She flirts with other guys when you are with her. Now the questions about jealousy when you and your date both are on the same dating website. 5. She goes online on the dating website daily. 6. She tells you that many guys are emailing to her and she is popular there. 7. She suddenly puts on her dating profile new hot pictures of herself. Every thing here that you have laid out is the tested formula to making WOMEN jealous, but in a way that draws them to you. And only the women (like your friend) who like games and likes to have their jealousy inflated. None of this works for men. Men dont work this way, not in a good way. Some women seem to think that what they like works the same for men, it doesnt. Women like men who demonstrate higher value by showing they are popular, are desired by other women, talk about what other women are hot, and use jealousy in general to rattle emotions. But thats a bad boy attitude, and they dont necessarily do that on purpose. And if men start acting jealous, they lost the battle anyway. As far as I know, for men, popularity isnt an issue. Long as the woman isnt a bitch and she is pretty. Once you start making a man jealous you will bring him to a place where you dont want him to be, he might lose his charm. Dont listen to your friend, she is confused and what she is describing is what works on her.
xpaperxcutx Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 If there's too much competition, most men will lose interest and run away. It's okay to make men jealous once in a while to build up attraction but when going about it, it's important to be coy. You don't want to appear as if you're trying too hard, it'll make you look vain, and egotistical. And don't bring up other guys unless asked. Conversations pertaining to other men that pursues should only be brought up if the topic asks for it.
clv0116 Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 If there's too much competition, most men will lose interest .... Very true. This is something men often misunderstand about women in fact. In this aspect of life women are incredibly tenacious and competitive. Men will get tired of the BS and move to someone that requires less effort for the payoff. Just sayin'. The first few things are OK, but if she starts flirting with guys in front of me or something like that I'm likely to ask for my half of the check and walk out on the spot.
Trialbyfire Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 Cinnamon, while I'm not a guy, I can tell you straight up that this is a recipe for disaster.
dreamergrl Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 I'm no man, but stirring up this game is asking for no good.
Cora Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 I think this is a wonderful idea! Tell your friend to go for it and see what happens.
dreamergrl Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 I think this is a wonderful idea! Tell your friend to go for it and see what happens. Please tell me this was sarcastic
Cora Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 Please tell me this was sarcastic Sorry, I'm just in one of those moods. I probably shouldn't be posting.
dreamergrl Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 Sorry, I'm just in one of those moods. I probably shouldn't be posting. Which type of mood?
Hkizzle Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 I have a question to men. Is it OK sometimes inflame men's jealousy? A friend of mine is currently on match.com and she believes that women should demonstrate to men that they are popular and desirable. My question is related to only verbal communication and it is not about cheating. Would it be OK if your GF does the following things to you? How would you feel about them? What would be possible results of doing these things for your relationship? 1. Talk with you about her ex.BFs sometimes. 2. Tell you that she thinks that some other guy looks attractive and hot. 3. Tell you stories of how other men are trying to pick her up everywhere she goes. 4. She flirts with other guys when you are with her. Now the questions about jealousy when you and your date both are on the same dating website. 5. She goes online on the dating website daily. 6. She tells you that many guys are emailing to her and she is popular there. 7. She suddenly puts on her dating profile new hot pictures of herself. Demonstrating that you're desirable and pre-selected by others definitely works to raise value, it's one of the basics in seduction strategy. But not in the way you're indicating. That's self promotion and comes off as tacky and makes a person seem like they're desperate, cheap or even slutty. What you're meant to do is actually have men in your life to show you're desired. So that doesn't work on a dating site, since you can't observe a person's interaction with other people. Also as another poster says this strategy can scare off men. Showing you are desired works best on alpha males, and has a negative effect on shy or straight up no game type of guys.
dreamergrl Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 Eh, it's that time of month. ooohhh so everything is sarcastic then don't feel bad, I'm hung over today, so I'm crabby.
lovebubble Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 i don't think so. i don't think there's anything cute or desirable about a jealous man.. even slight jealousy is a turn off for me after years of being with a jealous/insecure husband. imo, it's a red flag and i don't play around with jealousy. you can let a man know that you're desirable but, i don't think it should be used to site jealousy.
tkgirl Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 I have a question to men. Is it OK sometimes inflame men's jealousy? A friend of mine is currently on match.com and she believes that women should demonstrate to men that they are popular and desirable. My question is related to only verbal communication and it is not about cheating. Would it be OK if your GF does the following things to you? How would you feel about them? What would be possible results of doing these things for your relationship? 1. Talk with you about her ex.BFs sometimes. 2. Tell you that she thinks that some other guy looks attractive and hot. 3. Tell you stories of how other men are trying to pick her up everywhere she goes. 4. She flirts with other guys when you are with her. Now the questions about jealousy when you and your date both are on the same dating website. 5. She goes online on the dating website daily. 6. She tells you that many guys are emailing to her and she is popular there. 7. She suddenly puts on her dating profile new hot pictures of herself. girls that act like this are so annoying! to me they seem insecure and in need of constant reassuring etc... not an attractive quality I think! What about being confident and liking who you are and not needing the constant attention from men to feel good about themselves. That's what I aspire to be like anyways... I don't know, guys? what do you find more attractive? girls that play stupid games or ones that are strong and confident? to me it's a no brainer....
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