tigressA Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 I don't think it's going to work. I haven't seen CJ since Tuesday; I haven't been at work since then because there aren't any new projects (and no, I can't just ask for hours). He's out of there until Monday; when I talked to him on Tuesday he said he had exams all this week. He did come up to talk to me then when I was on my break, but there wasn't anything mind-blowing about our conversation, though he did smile at me a lot. Before he left he said goodbye and I teased him about not ever being online (it did irk me because he asked for my screenname), and he said he's been "really busy with school" and that he'd be on that night...but he wasn't, and he hasn't ever. I don't know his schedule, but I'm thinking that if he were truly interested he would've made an effort to talk to me outside of work. So either he's just not that into me, or he's got a girlfriend and I'm only a bit of fun to flirt with and give once-overs to at work. There's still some time left, but it might not be worth it anymore. I'm just working on not being so bummed out about it now.
stepka Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 Gawd, I feel your pain--crushes at work are so hard--and work is so dreary when you don't see them and you're hungry for every little crumb they toss your way, which come just often enough to keep you hanging on, but it goes nowhere. How many times have I been down that road? And for me, they've never worked out--not even once.
Jimmy's_Brother Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 That's you in the avatar, right? What the hell are you worried about?
Jimmy's_Brother Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 Hey jimmy how bout you stop hitting on internet women, it's really attractive let me tell you!!!!!!!!1 Hey- I am NOT Jimmy. I am Jimmy's Brother. Thank you.
littlewhiterose Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 tigressA, I feel your pain. Hang in there babygirl...
boogieboy Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 Tigress did you even try to turn up the flirting a lil just in case he was reading YOU wrong? Teasing him about not being online as a hint for "come and talk to me online" isnt going to cut it.
Author tigressA Posted August 15, 2009 Author Posted August 15, 2009 Tigress did you even try to turn up the flirting a lil just in case he was reading YOU wrong? Teasing him about not being online as a hint for "come and talk to me online" isnt going to cut it. Hahaha, I know. Ugh, I don't know what to do! I guess I thought what I've done so far was enough, but maybe not? I'm out of practice, like I said before. I really don't know him that well so I wonder if some things I would say would be crossing a line with him, or whatever. I become a dithering, blushing spaz around him and tend to be extra-careful of what I say...let me ask you, what would a girl have to say to you to get you to realize, "Hey, she's totally into me"?
boogieboy Posted August 15, 2009 Posted August 15, 2009 Hahaha, I know. Ugh, I don't know what to do! I guess I thought what I've done so far was enough, but maybe not? I'm out of practice, like I said before. I really don't know him that well so I wonder if some things I would say would be crossing a line with him, or whatever. I become a dithering, blushing spaz around him and tend to be extra-careful of what I say...let me ask you, what would a girl have to say to you to get you to realize, "Hey, she's totally into me"? Well Im a good reader of body language. So if she was looking me in the eyes, with a smile, laughing, and playing with her hair, I would have asked for her number on the first meeting. So your boy either isnt really into you, or hes afraid like you, at which point I think you know him well enough now to just say "lets go out after work", or "lets do something sometime, give me your number". Gotta take a chance.
Author tigressA Posted August 15, 2009 Author Posted August 15, 2009 Well Im a good reader of body language. So if she was looking me in the eyes, with a smile, laughing, and playing with her hair, I would have asked for her number on the first meeting. So your boy either isnt really into you, or hes afraid like you, at which point I think you know him well enough now to just say "lets go out after work", or "lets do something sometime, give me your number". Gotta take a chance. Well, I thought my body language was more than enough to indicate my interest--I can't help but smile so big my face feels about to crack; I blush, I giggle after everything I say--and everything he says, I fiddle around with my water bottle. One of my other coworkers said, "It's so obvious you like him, Stevie Wonder could see it." This was the same guy who told CJ one day, "I saw you two (him and me) smiling at each other like a bunch of giddy highschoolers; what's up with that?" and CJ had (apparently) said, "Yeah, she's cute." The day when he asked me for my screenname I'd said, "I noticed you around here pretty much immediately. And I wanted to notice you more, but then I never really get to see you around, so...." That was when he said, "I noticed you too, awhile ago." We've traded compliments, the basic "You look really nice" stuff a few times. That's as far as it's gotten in regards to acknowledging any interest...I thought that was enough, but maybe not. I don't work on Monday, but I know he's going to be there. I haven't notified the HR head about my last day there, so I'm considering "dropping in" just to do that so I have an excuse to be there and talk to him, because there could be a chance that I won't have any work not just on Monday, but for the rest of next week.
Author tigressA Posted August 17, 2009 Author Posted August 17, 2009 So, I decided to go in to work today even though I wasn't scheduled, under the guise of talking to the HR head about my last day--but neither the HR head nor CJ were even there! I did talk to the general maintenance guy who's very cool--very friendly and discreet--and he told me that CJ was off today but he'd be back tomorrow. I said, "That doesn't help me because I'm not scheduled for tomorrow anyway, and who knows, there might not be any work for the rest of this week!" He said, "I think he might be going on vacation too, at the end of this week, so I'll tell you what--you can write a note with your number on it and I'll give it to him tomorrow, so he can call you." I said, "Well, I wouldn't normally do this--I'd rather do it in person but I have no other choice right now, so why not?" I wrote, "Hi CJ--you're MIA on AIM, so here's my number...looking forward to hearing from you soon :)" and signed my first name. So he'll be getting that tomorrow. Like I said, I normally would do that in person but with the way things have been and will continue to be, I had no other choice if I want this to get somewhere. And I can safely assume that if he doesn't get in contact with me after that, then he's just not interested. I'll post here again if something happens...wish me luck!
CaliGuy Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 T, lots of work for this guy. You're pursuing too hard. BE the prize. Make him come to you as well. Make HIM put some effort in this. The harder you pursue, the more he'll pull away.
Author tigressA Posted August 17, 2009 Author Posted August 17, 2009 Well, I WOULD do it that way, but as I said, circumstances do not permit for that because I hardly ever get to see him as it is, and I'm leaving in less than two weeks--I already went the last 5 days without seeing him; tomorrow will be number 6. I think that's more than enough mystery, or whatever you want to call it...He'll have my number tomorrow, but that's as far as I'm willing to go--now the ball is in his court; if he calls, great, if he doesn't, then I assume he's not interested and move on. It's not that hard...haha...
dreamergrl Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 I guess I agree with Cali. You're trying to hard, especially when you're gone in a few weeks.
CaliGuy Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 I guess I agree with Cali. You're trying to hard, especially when you're gone in a few weeks. She's trying way too hard and men (and women) can sense this. "Why are they trying so hard?!" It's a huge turn off. All relationships need to maintain some balance. Remember, as sad as this statement is: "The person with the most power in a relationship is the one who cares about it the least." Sad but True. (No offense to Metallica)
dreamergrl Posted August 17, 2009 Posted August 17, 2009 I think he's not only going to sense that she's trying so hard, but wonder why, seeing how is she's leaving in a few weeks. Me, personally, I would not be a very interested knowing that the person is going to be gone in 2 weeks. That leaves no room for creating a bond or what not.
CaliGuy Posted August 18, 2009 Posted August 18, 2009 I think he's not only going to sense that she's trying so hard, but wonder why, seeing how is she's leaving in a few weeks. Me, personally, I would not be a very interested knowing that the person is going to be gone in 2 weeks. That leaves no room for creating a bond or what not. Yup. No sense in starting something up unless she isn't leaving town. Bottom line is she gave him her info. It's up to him to make the next move. She moved her pawn and he's sitting there not moving any pieces. This is what I mean by having a full basket (other options). If you put all your eggs in one basket (person) then you'll come off desperate which will always, always turn a potential date off.
Author tigressA Posted August 19, 2009 Author Posted August 19, 2009 Okay, so...good news first: I got to talk to him! Last night he was online and he sent me a message; we talked for a couple of hours and things got very flirty. My whole body was flushed with heat for most of the conversation. Bad news: He went on vacation to Florida today and won't be back until next Wednesday, and if I have work next week I'll see him no more than twice before I myself have to leave for good. Things don't look good; I can see that now especially with the vacation having popped up, but I also have no doubt now, from the conversation we had, that he's interested. I think there's a possibility of something happening. It's small, but it's still there. Like I said, if nothing happens, I move on. I'll be back at school and it'll be really easy for me to do.
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