SierraRose Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 So yes...I was truley in love with my ex MM. I've been in NC and have been trying to move on. It has been a year since I have seen him, I have taken the time to heal. I have choosen not to date, nor have sex (a year..OMG).. I feel so cynical. I am afraid to open up to someone new. I hear continually from married friends how miserable they are. I am told how lucky I am to be single. These days extra marital affairs seem to be running rampid. I would love to date, but I feel so safe under my rock. Is this normal for exOW?
whichwayisup Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 I think it's normal for anyone who had their heart broken. You just aren't ready yet to give someone the chance and fall inlove again. You should go out on afew dates..Even if it doesn't end up anywhere, it could be fun and exactly what you need to gain confidence in yourself (Meaning to know that there are others out there for you!)..
jj33 Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 Sierra Rose I feel very much the same. I havent dated not out of choice but because I havent had the opportunity. I would go if someone asked, but I do feel extremely cynical about the whole thing for the reasons you stated. I would never go back to the A or any A, but I have lost faith in the idea that I will find real love for myself.
bentnotbroken Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 That's a feeling that most of us have, BS, AP, or neither. Unfortunately it is the pain that truly heals. Go slow.
Lyssa Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 It's normal. You'll get over it. Go out and have fun. Retail therapy helps - new oufits, new shoes - make yourself feel good. Do it for you!
ladyRN Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 I think it takes time to heal but I do feel the best way is to try and be busy and take time out to do things for yourself. Spend time with close friends and family, spend time doing something you enjoy. A cliche but I usually find doing some exercise helps pick me up even if at first it can take an effort just to start. I usually find that work is so busy I don't have time to think about how I am feeling deep down. I'd agree that do do the dating thing, even just for some fun. You never know who may be around the corner. But I also understand that when you have been incredibly hurt it causes you to lose trust in others, it is far easier to be cynical. Just go with how you feel and don't feel bad about it.
Author SierraRose Posted August 14, 2009 Author Posted August 14, 2009 Thank you for the input! I have totally been focusing on myself and my son. I do feel good;, however, I was beginning to think something was wrong with me! lol Everything just takes time, I guess.
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