swan_song Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 So what's the best way to indicate interest without repeatedly hinting or name dropping with your friends - like, being proactive but not scary? Or do you just wait for circumstances to fall in place and "fate" to run its course? I don't particularly enjoy setting up my friends for those reasons - some end up pestering me about the setup or placing way too much responsibility on me - but surely there must be a good way to conduct yourself while remaining socially appealing to all parties involved.
BobSacamento Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 I feel like it's my responsibility as a friend to set up my friends. I think I'm only responsible in the initial contact though. Anything else is not my business. In turn, if one of friends has single friends and doesn't even mention a possible set up, they are pretty much on my "dead to me" list. I've had this happen. Someone mentioned how their friend was going to try to go on Match.com, I'm sitting there thinking "Hello I'm right here". I think I'm entitled to at least an explanation in that situation or wtf bring it up.
carhill Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 IMO, the person who is the beneficiary of the 'matchmaking' should indemnify and hold harmless the person (friend) who does the introducing. The beneficiary should make this known in advance. If a friend is single and looking, I make it my business to seek out potentials amongst our circle of friends. We had such dinners numerous times while I was married. None worked out but we all had fun anyway. That's what life's about
MN randomguy Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 1. Set one, offer to socialize with mixed company. 2. Set two, if someone mentions interest in another person, run it through the grapevine. Let them know if there is interest. 3. step three, let each party know any pertinent information that would help their situation. 4. step four, understand that you do not know anyone better than themselves. If they say no, they mean no. Just because you think X and Y would make such a cute couple and it would make you feel good, it means nothing.
Lyssa Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 Matchmaking is just not my thing. It can get pretty messy and it's not worth it.
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