infjer Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 I have a girlfriend that I used to be very close with. Then I started to notice little things she would do to make me feel bad about myself. She always had to 1-up me and was very superficial. I was definitely more of a friend to her than she was to me. However, I don't know if she was aware of the way she treated me or if it's just the way she is. She's not the most caring person either... She cheated on her husband, then her boyfriend, then started dating a guy she knew was in a relationship. That's just not my style and I didn't want to be around someone like that. Either way, I slowly distanced myself from her. For months we've had no contact. Come to find out from a mutual friend, she thought I stopped hanging around b/c I started dating someone, not b/c she treated me like ****. We briefly ran into each other a few weeks ago and she called me yesterday saying that she missed talking to me and wanted to get together. The problem is, I'm an all or nothing friend and I know I'll just get sucked right back into the friendship. I no longer hang out with "toxic" friends, but I'm wondering if she's not like that anymore... I don't know what to do. Should I be honest with her as to why I stopped hanging out in the first place or let it go? Should I give the friendship another shot or keep away?
WTRanger Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 People don't change over the span of a few months. She misses your attention, not you. Keep her at a toxic distance. You can let her know, but it won't solve anything.
Author infjer Posted August 14, 2009 Author Posted August 14, 2009 People don't change over the span of a few months. She misses your attention, not you. Keep her at a toxic distance. You can let her know, but it won't solve anything. i totally agree. the way she treats the guys she dates hasn't changed over the years, so why would it be any different with friends? acceptance and attention is what she thrives off of. i've never felt the need to tell her how i really feel b/c i know it won't matter or change things. thanks for the input... i appreciate your thoughts.
D-Lish Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 I've had gf's like this in the past- and if you rekindle the friendship you'll just find yourself in the same place again. It's not worth it!
carhill Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 Black hole alert! Nothing escapes, not even light. Avoid at all costs. Save yourself I'm watching something similar happening and have decided to use it as a psychology experiment
Author infjer Posted August 14, 2009 Author Posted August 14, 2009 well, ****. i guess i should leave well enough alone.
Yamaha Posted August 14, 2009 Posted August 14, 2009 If she truly cared about your friendship she would have contacted you when you lost touch. She is just wanting her ego stroked and really isn't your friend so I would stay away.
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