amagordos Posted August 13, 2009 Posted August 13, 2009 Well there is this guy who ive known for almost five years and we have been friends ever since. We have had our ups and downs and always got throught them but now it seems like we are never going to be friends again. It seems that we always fight over stupid petty little things and in high school i just knew he liked me as more than a friend. He never told me and its always bothered me because i knew already. I told him i liked this other guy once, while we were sitting in the library and his reaction was what gave it away. He suddenly got quiet and his voice was cracking and then it looked like he was going to cry, so he left the room suddenly and i called after him. The next day, he said i had bad taste. Well ever since then i knew and we were still good friends, and then suddenly the last month of our senior year, i realize that i have feelings for him too. I tell him how i feel, but as soon as i do that i instantly regret it. He hugs me and tells me we are just good friends, then i notice he begins to talk to this one girl in our art class a lot and that he acts all cheerful around her. Im worried he has a crush on her and that kills me inside. He acts rude and i think its because hes moving to another state and he wont ever see his friends again. I try to understand, but i can't and when the school year ends, he hugs me and i could sense hes about to cry and after that i dont see him for awhile. The whole summer vacation i think about him and through myspace i find out he is still in california, so im a little upset that he didn't tell me he was still here, but im also excited to see him again. That day we meet at school and talk for awhile and i know that im in love with him because i get butterflies when i see him and i could sense that i make him nervous as well. Well he then takes off with his drama buddies to go see a movie and i wonder why we never hung out like that? So i act rude and he does to and the cycle continues for the next few years because later he dates other girls and brags about how he has found love. Well didn't i tell him i liked him? Why does he keep mentioning other girls then? So the last night we were friends, this is what happened: He comes over unannounced with his girl pal while im in the shower. When i see him i almost don't recognize him because he is a different person. His hair is longer, his clothes is totally different and he is wearing blue contact lenses. Of course being the blunt person that i am, i comment on his appearance right away. Throughtout the whole night, i make snide remarks and tease him, mostly because im joking but also because im upset that i havent seen him in over a year and that he went to other people's houses before mine several times. Plus he went to disneyland with his gal pal he brought to my house and its like they do everything together. Ok i was jealous and i need to get over this guy, but everytime i tell him how i feel he gets mad. And everytime i try to leak some of my frustration on him by putting him down, well of course he gets even more mad. Nothing i do works. This time i went to far and i he left me a long message saying he doesnt want to be my friend anymore and that i shouldn't even bother apologizing because ive gotten worse than in high school. Naturally i was crushed and spend the whole week crying for hours. I tried to get him back by kissing up and telling him why i acted the way i did, but that backfired even moreso because he got freaked out by me, saying i can't get over my stupid little crush. Its been two months and after being ignored i don't know how to get him back.
big_girls_rock Posted August 13, 2009 Posted August 13, 2009 Sometimes it's best to sleeping dogs lie. I think he genuinely did have a crush on you in high school, but at the time you didn't reciprocate so he pursued others. It's tough because after a while you liked him back, but it's possible it wasn't good enough for him. He's changed, he's seeing other people which tells me he's just not interested in you in that way anymore and you need to let him be. It's possible that he may still have some feelings for you, if so, let him pursue you, if he doesn't it was never meant to be though two months is a long time to ignore someone. He said in his own words "stupid little crush" which to me means YOU refuse to get over HIM. For now, he's obviously upset with you, so let him go and let time heal you because it's the only thing that will help you get over him.
Author amagordos Posted August 13, 2009 Author Posted August 13, 2009 thank you for the advice, but im very impatient and i just cant help myself. Now i talk to him on my fake myspace, but i feel like its wrong because i gave in and started talking to him after he's ignored me for so long. I try to say im sorry but not directly and he acts like he doesn't care. He really is upset and he mentioned on his myspace that he will not tolerate judgemental people, which is what he calls me. He also hung out with this one friend of mine, who he says he can't stand that much when he always used to tell me that he couldnt hang out with me because of her. Honestly now i feel like an idiot.
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