LovedByHim Posted August 13, 2009 Posted August 13, 2009 I'm not sure where else to put this, but I hope I can find some others who are in the same predicament as me. A bit of history since this is my first post to these forums (hello!). My boyfriend and I met in February on an online dating site when neither of us really had any hope of finding anyone special there. We found each other, and things progressed naturally since we've always lived in the same town. Except for 3 weeks after we met, he left for 2 months to the states for training for his work. And his work has played a huge part in our relationship. We just moved in together in a strange city closer to some of the oil wells that he services. I still feel like I don't see him enough. He works 12 hours away from home in a camp for 15 days. Then he'll come back home for what seems like a very quick 6 days. Not seeing him at night during the other 15 days is hard. It's very hard. I've never been one to get really attached to my partner. I'm 26, I have been in love, but not like this. My god though - I'm incredibly dependent on him for my happiness and I'm very attached. Perhaps.. clingy? I'm absolutely smitten by my man and I'd like to think that he thinks the world of me too. I'm crazy about him, and I think that he might be it. This might be the one. And I'd be completely fine with that. It's taken a few toads, and it's only taken 6 short months, but when you know I guess you just know. I cry every time he leaves for a set of days at work. He's become a lot more comforting about it - at first, he was nearly cold about my emotions. But his clock ticks different than mine. He left this morning and I'm still reeling from not having him around. The bed feels empty, my insides feel heavy and I am unhappy. I'll be okay - I always am. But I do cry. Probably more than I should. I also suffer from clinical depression that I manage to the best of my ability. I've become nearly dependent on him for my own happiness - the woman that I've always made fun of. I dislike clingy, needy girls. And here I am, pining for a man who has barely been away for 20 hours. It's getting easier but barely. I'm so incredibly in love with this man that it is so hard when he works so hard and so very far away. Don't get me wrong - being reunited every 15 days is simply amazing. I hope it's always like that. But I hope I don't always have to say goodbye to him every 6 days for another two weeks. Does anyone else have a partner who works far from home and is gone a lot more than he is at home? How do you cope? How do you let go of the vice grip? And an added detail - trust is not a question. I've been burned very bad in the past but I don't think he'd ever do that. He goes out and has a lot of drinks at the end of a set before he comes home (his camp is a 'dry' camp, therefore no alcohol and oilfield boys tend to get really tangly when they drink) and I never, ever worry about him cheating on me. He is wonderful, mine, and I am his. It's rarely entered my mind but I am a girl and I'm guilty of sometimes being jealous. :love: So very much in love but so very hurt by absence.
OceansApart Posted August 18, 2009 Posted August 18, 2009 Hey, I know what you are going through. My boyfriend also worked (got layed off) in the oilfield. My boyfriend is from Alberta too, though I don't live there most of our communication is through phone/text/computer.He had the same 15/6 and boy its tough. He would fly to me when he had his 6 days off. But, I knew that once it was over it was back to 15 days 12hr or even 16hr day shifts. At first when he was up north in a camp and I didn't hear from him, I cried too. It was tough and I am on the other side of the country. What I would do is try to distract myself as much as I could. Does he call or text you as much as he can? I know that my boyfriend would call me when he could, though in the Camps its very hard to do that. Its hard but that this is their lifestyle, your from Alberta so you know this is what they do. I think only time will make it easier unless he gets another job but, if he's like my boyfriend, he's a born oilfield worker that's their life. Pays good too! Let me know how you are doing? or If you would like to talk, I wish i had someone who knew what I was going through when he would leave for his 15 days. When my boyfriend goes back to work soon. It will start back for me too! Ahh...
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