La de Longe Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 So in terms of getting over this person I'd say I'm doing pretty well. I'm at the point where I'm not obsessing over what he's doing, I'm not angry, I'm not really even that hurt over what happened anymore. I'm trying to focus on my life and moving forward with the things I need to, but I'm now fighting this incredible apathy. I kinda don't want to do anything and my energy just seems really low. I know it's partially because I'm on summer vacation and actually don't have anything to do right now so I have don't have much to really distract myself with. I'll be back at school in less than three weeks and I think that will help snap me out of it, but until then anyone got any pick-me-up advice?
broken_promises Posted August 12, 2009 Posted August 12, 2009 I'm in exactly the same place (well, I'm still obsessing a bit over what/who I think he is doing, but...) and I do think it is because I have nothing to do right now. I am looking for a job and grad school for me starts in September. The only thing that has helped beat that apathy is trying to plan something with friends almost every night. Luckily, I have a lot of friends around me right now (I didn't while with the ex) so it has been great to reconnect with them. But the apathy... not wanting to work out, not wanting to get back to a healthier me... it can set in when I don't have something to distract me. Today I had no plans and I just hung around all day, read a book, didn't shower, and just languished. I wish I had more advice for you!
moo Posted August 12, 2009 Posted August 12, 2009 Arts and crafts and other hobbies like genealogy help me a lot.
Dmoney28 Posted August 12, 2009 Posted August 12, 2009 i feel you on this. I have been the same way. I used to be a gym rat...went like 4 days out the week...havent been in months. I was working on my next rank in muay thai...havent been in weeks. Its like i have to force myself to do things. Even going to work seems like a struggle.
Author La de Longe Posted August 12, 2009 Author Posted August 12, 2009 Well, I'm glad to know that I'm not alone on this one, because for a while I thought I might be depressed. I'm worried that this is going to follow me back to college where I'll actually have to focus, which I haven't been able to do very well either. Luckily, it's my senior year and won't be as academically intense, but I'm right now I'm so not looking forward to that thesis...
broken_promises Posted August 12, 2009 Posted August 12, 2009 I think the apathy can be part of a depression, but it's normal after a loss like this. I definitely think that going back to school will actually help (but I understand your fear that it will follow you there.) I think this is all part of the healing process. I know that for myself, once I can get excited about something and have something to look forward to or something to occupy my time, I tend to start feeling better. For example, today I started looking at different things to become involved in for grad school (the health center, arts groups, etc.) which has already lifted my spirits just thinking about new things on the horizon. Maybe you could do something like that while waiting for school to start? Start planning something for a few months down the road... for example, I will be skydiving as part of a fundraiser in October. I am also planning to train for a 5K with a beginner's running group. I think just anything that gives you something to look forward to can help break that apathy. Good luck! It is good to know that other people are in the same boat.
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