SimpleSam Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 A friend and I were having a good discussion the other day about how not to be "friend-zoned" by a girl you are interested in. I'm just curious to see what some of you have to say concerning this subject?
Thaddeus Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 Rather than repeating what's already written, I'll just refer you to these sites: How to avoid "lets just be friends" with a woman and never end up in a friend zoneAvoid the Friend ZoneHow to Avoid the Friend Zone: For Guys
BCCA Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 Simple, dont act like youre just a friend. Listening to all her problems over coffee is something friends do, while watching a movie at your apartment is something you do with someone youre dating. Also, you have to make it obvious what your intentions are, be touchy feely (while being tasteful and respectful, of course), say she looks hot, and be upfront. People usually fall into the friendzone by doing nothing to let the girl know they are interested in more.
carhill Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 IMO, from vast experience with this, the best way is to, before having significant interaction of a personal nature, once you know you are attracted to her, ask her out on a date. For example, there's someone I've had light contact with for 15-20 years and recently found myself thinking of her differently. I have a journal on this person and the interactions. I would never try to become her 'friend' away from that light contact, but rather, once I'm in a position to do so, ask her out on a date and accept her answer. The key is knowing there are many potentials and not to wrap too much time, energy or emotion in any one potential, at least prior to gauging her responses. For example, I have other female friends and I get emotional validation that way, so I don't think of this person in an emotional way. She's just someone I find attractive. Emotional bonds develop later. If I ask her out and she has a BF, well, that's too bad, but not devastating, because I haven't invested. I don't even consider broaching that subject (relationships), because then we start moving into the realm of a friend, and that's not what I want (theoretically). I listen and gather information in a casual way. I'm not free to date because I'm still married legally, so I don't act. If I were divorced, I'd already have acted. I'm not looking for sex/casual, and this person definitely has long-term value. Timing is everything. Hope that makes sense
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