john1988 Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 I didn't know NC was such a universal thing until I came to this forum (I'm even calling it by its abbreviation now haha.) I just find it heartbreaking to think that while I'm in so much pain over the love I've lost, my ex is probably pinning after someone who I bet doesn't love her nearly half as much as me and even cheats on her from time to time and takes her for granted. Does anyone feel the same?
greenparrot Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 everyday i feel like this when I know I screwed up by answering her texts or calls. So today something new, I have concluded by experience that I wouldnt be as messed up if I hadnt ever answered her. My consolation is the fact that her new Bf is an ahole and will end up screwing her, and then she will regret it. Im sorry if its harsh, but if thats the only way, then be it. Hang in there, go nc.
steelfist9 Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 I first started going no contact and she couldn't stand it. She'd walk by me at work and would yell in front of other people, saying I didn't want to talk to her..etc. She would go biserk over it and ask me why I wouldn't talk to her. I told her that it would be harder for me to get over her if we were still friends. At the time it was partially bull and partially true. Part of me loved going no contact as a way to get her back because of how much it affected her. And, back then it worked. But no, she is pretty much trying to ignore me,also. from time to time at work I see her shoot glances at me and I hear people say that she talks about me and was pretty upset that I brought another woman into work. My question is, if she's already with another guy and she wont want me ever again, why does she care?
Author john1988 Posted August 11, 2009 Author Posted August 11, 2009 everyday i feel like this when I know I screwed up by answering her texts or calls. So today something new, I have concluded by experience that I wouldnt be as messed up if I hadnt ever answered her. My consolation is the fact that her new Bf is an ahole and will end up screwing her, and then she will regret it. Im sorry if its harsh, but if thats the only way, then be it. Hang in there, go nc. What I don't get is we know both these guys are *******s but does she? No she probably loves the challenge of a badboy which annoys me. I know this because I was the mysterious guy at the start of the relationship who she couldn't stop pestering- eventually got trapped in her net- the result- she's bored and dumps me, my advice to you is she isn't going to get sick of this guy until he turns into a love sick pony and is all over her. If you want her back then you need to become more unpredictable-easier said than done mind you.
Author john1988 Posted August 11, 2009 Author Posted August 11, 2009 I first started going no contact and she couldn't stand it. She'd walk by me at work and would yell in front of other people, saying I didn't want to talk to her..etc. She would go biserk over it and ask me why I wouldn't talk to her. I told her that it would be harder for me to get over her if we were still friends. At the time it was partially bull and partially true. Part of me loved going no contact as a way to get her back because of how much it affected her. And, back then it worked. But no, she is pretty much trying to ignore me,also. from time to time at work I see her shoot glances at me and I hear people say that she talks about me and was pretty upset that I brought another woman into work. My question is, if she's already with another guy and she wont want me ever again, why does she care? Can I ask if she used to control you? Some people hate the fact that they used to push your buttons but now you don't play by the rules, women like challenges if she dumped you she thinks she had the upper hand again by you ignoring her and moving on makes her feel insecure. I think the answer to your question is she is wanting to see if she can get you back it's an ego thing and once she does she will toss you to the side again and by you not allowing that youre spot on my brother. The fact is I've came to realize nothing ever good comes from getting back with an ex when it's that sort of situation it's a waste of time.
llala Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 saddens me too. But if you break your upper hand for a bit, you can easily re-gain it unless you royally **** up. IE: if you've contacted her 2-3 x saying "hope things are ok with you". That's still ok. Try not to say that you want her back. It's hard to move on. Like accepting a death that never happened.
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