terrylips Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 I have been reading these forums since I was dumped by a girl about a month ago. We hadn't been together that long but I was totally into her and thought we were going somewhere. It has been really helpful reading other peoples stories and experiences. Now a month has passed since we split and the only advice I can give people on here is to never ever break NC. Like a predicable idiot I wrote a desperate email two weeks after we broke up, now I wish I had never had sent it. By contacting her I just confirmed everything that she thought about me and justified her decision in dumping me. I am in such a better place now but I am angrier with myself for writing that email than with her for breaking up with me. I feel like such a weak idiot for contacting her and realise once she dumped me she had made her decision - the fact is she doesn't even think about me any more. So don't ever contact your ex, they know where you are and how to get in touch with you, if you contact them you will only regret it and make yourself look like a loser - and we all know no one wants to date a loser. Don't be a sucka, you will meet someone else and be happy again
Thaddeus Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 So don't ever contact your ex, they know where you are and how to get in touch with you, if you contact them you will only regret it and make yourself look like a loser - and we all know no one wants to date a loser.+1. Quoted for truth.
northstar1 Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 I have been reading these forums since I was dumped by a girl about a month ago. We hadn't been together that long but I was totally into her and thought we were going somewhere. It has been really helpful reading other peoples stories and experiences. Now a month has passed since we split and the only advice I can give people on here is to never ever break NC. Like a predicable idiot I wrote a desperate email two weeks after we broke up, now I wish I had never had sent it. By contacting her I just confirmed everything that she thought about me and justified her decision in dumping me. I am in such a better place now but I am angrier with myself for writing that email than with her for breaking up with me. I feel like such a weak idiot for contacting her and realise once she dumped me she had made her decision - the fact is she doesn't even think about me any more. So don't ever contact your ex, they know where you are and how to get in touch with you, if you contact them you will only regret it and make yourself look like a loser - and we all know no one wants to date a loser. Don't be a sucka, you will meet someone else and be happy again You have learned this quick young Jedi. Well done.
john1988 Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 I have been reading these forums since I was dumped by a girl about a month ago. We hadn't been together that long but I was totally into her and thought we were going somewhere. It has been really helpful reading other peoples stories and experiences. Now a month has passed since we split and the only advice I can give people on here is to never ever break NC. Like a predicable idiot I wrote a desperate email two weeks after we broke up, now I wish I had never had sent it. By contacting her I just confirmed everything that she thought about me and justified her decision in dumping me. I am in such a better place now but I am angrier with myself for writing that email than with her for breaking up with me. I feel like such a weak idiot for contacting her and realise once she dumped me she had made her decision - the fact is she doesn't even think about me any more. So don't ever contact your ex, they know where you are and how to get in touch with you, if you contact them you will only regret it and make yourself look like a loser - and we all know no one wants to date a loser. Don't be a sucka, you will meet someone else and be happy again I'm always delighted when I hear people realizing and posting stories like this. I only wish I could stick to it myself however it's difficult when you are given false hope by others, it takes a strong person not to react.
Devil Inside Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 This is the truth brother...lay it down. Of course always easier said then done.
NightLord1 Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 I'm always delighted when I hear people realizing and posting stories like this. I only wish I could stick to it myself however it's difficult when you are given false hope by others, it takes a strong person not to react. The soul is like iron...it may bend and melt but it will NEVER break.
Exit Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 Yup, we all come to this realization in the end. I maintained contact for way too long. I don't regret letting her know that I was sorry and that I had made a lot of mistakes, but once I got that off my chest, I should have stopped. Instead the letters continued back and forth and I was convinced something could work out. But now I've gone NC and realize I should have done this a long time ago. I was waiting for her to do me the favor of saying "you have zero chance, please leave me alone", but she never made it that easy, she let me keep chasing her. I had to decide to cut the cord.
carnegie Posted August 12, 2009 Posted August 12, 2009 Well, I realize what i have to do now! just "NC"! Thanks for your sharing!
DustySaltus Posted August 12, 2009 Posted August 12, 2009 My ex knew exactly what to say to get under my skin. She would tell me that I wasn't the person for her and then tell me that she never meant those words and would always loved me. This happened four or five times and then things settled down. We eventually got engaged and you know what....same thing happened again. Should've stayed NC as well but she did try and get me fired from my job, so it's safe to say I was machine gunning emails and phone calls the next couple of days. Looking back, I should've just told her she's pathetic and went NC forever.
selena_cat Posted August 12, 2009 Posted August 12, 2009 Yup, we all come to this realization in the end. I maintained contact for way too long. I don't regret letting her know that I was sorry and that I had made a lot of mistakes, but once I got that off my chest, I should have stopped. Instead the letters continued back and forth and I was convinced something could work out. But now I've gone NC and realize I should have done this a long time ago. I was waiting for her to do me the favor of saying "you have zero chance, please leave me alone", but she never made it that easy, she let me keep chasing her. I had to decide to cut the cord. I could have written this exact sentence myself,its so true
Sbrizio Posted August 12, 2009 Posted August 12, 2009 Thanks for this. We're in very similar situations. I've made your mistake - the letter - plus a couple more. I'm not yet in the place you are now and i wish i were. Thx again for the example!
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