john1988 Posted August 10, 2009 Posted August 10, 2009 My ex girlfriend split up with me about a year ago saying she wasn't sure about us, blaming everything from stress to her parents for the cause, I should've known as whenever we were out she would heavily flirt with other guys but was never quite sure if anything had happened. I was absolutely devasted but I tried to make things as amicable as possible between us in the hope we could get back together eventually. To cut a long story short, I went NC for ages but she would make my life extremely difficult by saying some horrible things about me, which I felt I didn't deserve, she would bring guys in to the supermarket we both used to work in (once she left) and introduce them as her boyfriend to other colleagues but I was getting stupid texts at silly hours in the morning from her which I largely ignored, things like "why didn't things work out between us?" and "i miss you" but everytime I would get encouragement and ask her to meet up she would pull away, every now and then I still get emails or online messages from her when I know fine well she does have a boyfriend now, I try to take the higher ground and respond but my answers are an indication that I don't want to talk to her so why does she always persist? I'm just wondering why she's still torturing me? Is she displaying guilt? Does she feel something for me? Is she wanting to know if I'm still dangling? Did I put her on too much of a pedestal and this new guy doesn't? or Is she just pretty twisted?
lupa Posted August 10, 2009 Posted August 10, 2009 Her ego is fed every time she feels wanted/liked. By responding or even acknowledging you feed this ego. Let it go, she isn't worth it. (easier said than done, I know).
boogieboy Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 Everytime you answer her in any way, youre pretty much telling her that youre still dangling. Dont ever answer her again. Its been a year already, and by now you should have told her never to contact you again. You did good by cutting her off, but you didnt cut her off completely. Nows the time.
Soul Bear Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 there is no need to be confused. she obviously is playing games with you. she can't even be trusted. she is in a R and she is saying this stuff to you? she sounds like a head case and is playing you like there is no tomorrow . do as advised here, tell her to stay out of your life and keep NC , obviously she is preventing you healing 100%
Author john1988 Posted August 11, 2009 Author Posted August 11, 2009 Thanks and you are all right, just wish I had known this all sooner, In a strange way I'm glad it has happened because I've learned from it and I don't think I would make the same mistakes again although I struggle to let people close to me now. I don't even know what I'm looking for here, maybe a sincere apology or to take her back so I can treat her like crap which is just a bad idea.
llala Posted August 11, 2009 Posted August 11, 2009 NC isnt about showing you're a tough guy. It's about showing you dont care about her. Attention= >>>their ego.
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