Morgenstern Posted August 10, 2009 Share Posted August 10, 2009 Posting for a friend.... -------------------------------- Im 24 and he is 20. We have been dating for a little over a month but were talking for a couple months before hand. I have completely fallen for him but one thing that keeps coming up is the age difference. It doesn't bother him one bit, but for some reason with me it does. It bothers me mainly when we are hanging out with his group of friends, i feel like his age shows more then. But when its just the two of us it really doesn't bother me much at all, in fact usually i forget. I worry that im falling behind with where i thought i would be with someone at this point in my life. He is more mature in ways than most people my age that i have been with . Hes everything i could want in someone but the stupid age thing keeps haunting me. I feel like its all in my head, and im the only one that finds this weird. Any input or advice i would reeeeally appreciate it! thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
Thornton Posted August 10, 2009 Share Posted August 10, 2009 Four years age difference is nothing Perhaps it bothers you more when his friends are around because they behave in a juvenile kind of way? Does he behave in a more juvenile way when his friends are around? It sounds like his friends are kind of childish and are a bad influence on him. Link to post Share on other sites
Teslacoil Posted August 10, 2009 Share Posted August 10, 2009 I was 24 and my ex-wife was 19 when we got engaged. Of course she is an "ex", so obviously THAT was a mistake. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Morgenstern Posted August 10, 2009 Author Share Posted August 10, 2009 They arent a bad influence in anyway. I guess he is acting normally, how she should be for his age and really, if they were all 23,24,25 or so i would be totally comfortable. Link to post Share on other sites
dreamergrl Posted August 10, 2009 Share Posted August 10, 2009 Four years isn't bad for the most part, but you're going to see a bigger difference because of the actual age. I'm 27, and I wont go younger then 25 or older then 35. I don't want a man that's in a completely different stage in life. I bent my rule earlier this year, and dated a 23 year old. He lacked the maturity level I needed out of a man. But for the most part, you can't expect much out of people at a certain age. Link to post Share on other sites
I Luv the Chariot OH Posted August 10, 2009 Share Posted August 10, 2009 Four years age difference is nothing I hate when people say this, because it's so relative. Sure, 4 years isn't a big difference if you're middle-aged. But at 20, you're just finished high school and starting college/university. At 24, you're either well into the workforce or pursuing higher/specialized education. It really is two different worlds. Link to post Share on other sites
bella16 Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 I don't think its bad at all. My sister just turned 26 and her boyfriend of 6 months is 21. They are completely in love...I actually envy what they have. Hes mature for his age, and they are bestfriends and lovers. They were never bothered by the age difference one bit. Link to post Share on other sites
SoulSearch_CO Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 I met my XH when I was 22 and he was 37. 15-year age gap. Yes, we're divorced, now, but it has nothing to do with the age. When someone above said "it's relative," yes - that's true. But I'd say it has more to do with the PEOPLE involved than the ages. Link to post Share on other sites
DSM-IV Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 Four years isn't bad for the most part, but you're going to see a bigger difference because of the actual age. I'm 27, and I wont go younger then 25 or older then 35. I don't want a man that's in a completely different stage in life. I bent my rule earlier this year, and dated a 23 year old. He lacked the maturity level I needed out of a man. But for the most part, you can't expect much out of people at a certain age. WTF dreamer you told me to visit you in denver lol and I'm 22. I'm the professional model, you saw my album Link to post Share on other sites
dreamergrl Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 WTF dreamer you told me to visit you in denver lol and I'm 22. I'm the professional model, you saw my album Ummm where was I for this? Link to post Share on other sites
Hkizzle Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 WTF dreamer you told me to visit you in denver lol and I'm 22. I'm the professional model, you saw my album Just got busted? Link to post Share on other sites
DSM-IV Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 Thomas X forever. Remember my joke topic about good looking girls from PA/Oh. Link to post Share on other sites
Hkizzle Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 Regarding OP. Depends on what you want. Most guys at 20 are too immature and even if this guy isn't you're seeing it in his friends. It also depends on what you want from the relationship. Just hanging out is fine, but later on you might find out you're at different stages in life. My friend who's 28 started dating a 25 year old. When I met the guy I knew my friend was wasting her time. She wants to get married, and when I met the guy I knew he was a player. In other words they had totally different expectations from the relationship. There's a reason why the average marrying age for men is about 3 years older than women in most countries. So even if the guy is mature and cool they have to be on the same page. Link to post Share on other sites
SoulSearch_CO Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 Ummm where was I for this? I didn't have the hots for him and even I remember that thread. LOL Link to post Share on other sites
DSM-IV Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 24 with a 20 year old? Absolutely not. I'm scanning your IP address so I can alert everyone in your area that a predator is living amongst them. Link to post Share on other sites
dreamergrl Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 I didn't have the hots for him and even I remember that thread. LOL I was the alcohol. Link to post Share on other sites
edinsvet Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 four years is definitely not a problem Link to post Share on other sites
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