lupa Posted August 10, 2009 Posted August 10, 2009 Someone mentioned he looked short, and so I'll start there and tie it into the whole conversation. Looks, build, clothing, style, etc, all matter in the first minute or so. Women want to make sure that they're not dealing with a psycho rapist, that is it. From there IT IS HOW HE MAKES THE WOMAN FEEL ABOUT HERSELF. That's all there is to it. I'm short (5'6") and have dated women from 5' to 6' tall. I was married to a woman who was 5'8"...and quite frankly I'm starting to think it is ending because I stopped doing those things that built her pride and self-esteem (because I didn't think I needed to, lesson learned). Can your friend approach a woman with a smile and eye contact, but not staring? Can he make her laugh? Can he make her feel good about herself? If she is hanging out in the group, then he has nothing to worry about appearance-wise...it is all in how he makes her feel.
Thaddeus Posted August 10, 2009 Posted August 10, 2009 What the f*** are you people smoking? If he is true to himself, then that is all that matters. So what he looks different, that's his style. If I were him I'd keep on keeping on and f*** what people think, especially girls who have no place telling a man how he should do anything especially dress!Yea, but he's probably not being true to himself, he's being true to an image of what he figures a metal rocker should be. Lots of metal rockers look pretty much the same - long hair, beard/moustache, tattered jeans or black leather. It's rather dull, actually. Once - just once - I'd like to see a metal rocker show up onstage in a tuxedo. (Alice Cooper did that for a tour and got RAVE reviews. I think it was the "Welcome To My Nightmare" tour.) Music is (sadly) primarily about marketing. Always has been.
Lizzie60 Posted August 10, 2009 Posted August 10, 2009 Look, he's the one on the far right: http://www.metal-archives.com/images/3/5/4/0/3540275054_photo.jpg I'm guessing it's the first one. He DEFINITELY does NOT come off as a condescending jerk. But he does lack a certain alpha-ness. But still! Given his other qualities, you'd think women would be throwing themselves at him, especially the more dominating sorts... OMG.. long hair like that is soooo outdated (old fashioned) .. tell him to cut his hair.. and put a smile on his face.. he's cute but he doesn't seem very confident. He might have bad breath.. who knows?
Lizzie60 Posted August 10, 2009 Posted August 10, 2009 ewwwwwwwwwwwwww!!! I'd be surprised to know if any of them got laid... Maybe a bath would help? ................ that's what I thought too.. not just the little boy.. but the whold band..
CaliGuy Posted August 10, 2009 Posted August 10, 2009 I'm just musing about A's guitarist who cannot pick up a chick to save his life. The last girl who was even remotely interested in him was fat/unattractive and it was over a year ago. I don't get it. He has the prettiest face ever (next to my BF who is the most stunning man alive ) with beautiful long wavy golden-blond hair and blue eyes, he's slim, smart, extremely talented and super-nice, has a successful musical career so far, and a nice house and car... I'd date the crap out of him if I hadn't met A first He has plenty of friends, so it's not like he lacks access to people/women... Why don't chicks like him?? I think he's shy or says the wrong thing sometimes or SOMETHING. What a waste. There could be a million reasons. If you want to help him: 1. Tell him to buy the book "No More Mr Nice Guy" (Glover). Teaches men how to build confidence and self-respect. 2. If he doesn't love, value and respect himself, nor will women. 3. If he doesn’t see himself as a prize, nor will women. There's usually two domniate personality types that turn women off: A. The rude faced, quiet guy (think "Hobbit"). Doesn't talk to anyone, keeps to himself, never smiles. He looks like life has kicked him in the balls. B. The desperate "talker". The guy who is so insecure that he has to trump himself up when he talks to women. So much so that they don't get a word in during the conversation. If he is either one of those types, that might explain it. Tell him to read the book I suggested and, if he's talking to women, start up a conversation (smile), ask her a question and then shut the heck up and let her talk
Author Birdy Posted August 10, 2009 Author Posted August 10, 2009 Yea, but he's probably not being true to himself, he's being true to an image of what he figures a metal rocker should be. Lots of metal rockers look pretty much the same - long hair, beard/moustache, tattered jeans or black leather. It's rather dull, actually. Once - just once - I'd like to see a metal rocker show up onstage in a tuxedo. (Alice Cooper did that for a tour and got RAVE reviews. I think it was the "Welcome To My Nightmare" tour.) Music is (sadly) primarily about marketing. Always has been. Fine, fine. But if he cuts off that hair I will cut off his testicles. Someone mentioned he looked short, and so I'll start there and tie it into the whole conversation. Looks, build, clothing, style, etc, all matter in the first minute or so. Women want to make sure that they're not dealing with a psycho rapist, that is it. From there IT IS HOW HE MAKES THE WOMAN FEEL ABOUT HERSELF. That's all there is to it. I'm short (5'6") and have dated women from 5' to 6' tall. I was married to a woman who was 5'8"...and quite frankly I'm starting to think it is ending because I stopped doing those things that built her pride and self-esteem (because I didn't think I needed to, lesson learned). Can your friend approach a woman with a smile and eye contact, but not staring? Can he make her laugh? Can he make her feel good about herself? If she is hanging out in the group, then he has nothing to worry about appearance-wise...it is all in how he makes her feel. See, THIS is the kind of advice he needs. Trust me when I tell you it's NOT his appearance that's turning off the women he wants, aside from maybe looking extremely young. We do need some confidence- and verve-building lessons for him. Even A commented that homeboy's lack of p*ssy is bringing down his general confidence even further to the point where the music is starting to suffer, so we're not just talking about getting someone laid here... the implications are bigger and extend into the success of their project. Get a load of this: we were actually thinking of hiring a call girl to come over to rehearsal one day and hit on him (not telling him she's "hired help", of course), so maybe he goes home with her, gets some action and a new lease on life
Author Birdy Posted August 10, 2009 Author Posted August 10, 2009 Tell him to buy the book "No More Mr Nice Guy" (Glover). Teaches men how to build confidence and self-respect... Tell him to read the book I suggested and, if he's talking to women, start up a conversation (smile), ask her a question and then shut the heck up and let her talk Thank you, I will buy this book and have A give it to him!
lupa Posted August 10, 2009 Posted August 10, 2009 Get a load of this: we were actually thinking of hiring a call girl to come over to rehearsal one day and hit on him (not telling him she's "hired help", of course), so maybe he goes home with her, gets some action and a new lease on life Terrible, terrible, terrible idea. His change has to come from within. Eye contact, smile. Best pickup line in the world? "Hello." That's it...get the ball rolling, and it becomes a number game. Someone will bite, it is just a question of time.
Keoki Posted August 10, 2009 Posted August 10, 2009 If he shaved and cut his hair, he'd be pretty hot. I don't know I'd go as far as saying he'd be "pretty hot," but he'd look a LOT better if he lost all that hair. Personally, I'd shave it all off. But he can still have longer hair than usual and still be "scene" appropriate: http://haircutsformen.blogspot.com/2009/07/cool-mens-long-haircuts.html http://www.ehairexperts.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/guys-long-hair.jpg
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