aboynamedmike Posted August 9, 2009 Posted August 9, 2009 So I've been broken up with my ex for a little over a month now. I am at the point where I no longer want her back, but some things will remind me of the good times we had and I will miss her. I initiated no contact, and it last for a week or so, but she wouldn't leave me alone...sending me texts asking how my vacation was and when I was going back to school. Then she called me and was really upset so I told her I'll try and be open to her and help her out. BAD MOVE. Ever since I've done this, I think about her a lot more, and whenever I get a text/call I secretly wish it is her. I DON'T WANT THIS! I'm so close to just telling her that I need my space and to NOT CONTACT ME. Altho her b-day is coming up (18th), and I don't want to ruin it for her. Anyone's ex do this to them too?
WiseOne1 Posted August 10, 2009 Posted August 10, 2009 Yes, my ex use to break NC regardless of how I felt. Once I told her never to call me again, and just forget about me, and she calls me the next day trying to talk to me. I also told her that I wanted her to go talk with her new bf and act like I don't exist and she called, and I ignored her and did not answer the phone, and she called atlest 9 times in that day until I finally picked up. Also she cried for about 2 hours str8 one time when I tried to go NC, so yea I've been through it, but from personal experience dont pick up when she calls, because the only reason a ex calls is for validation or when there bored, or when things are not working out with there new BF. Once she becomes happy with the new bf, she will forget about you.
Author aboynamedmike Posted August 10, 2009 Author Posted August 10, 2009 Yea man, I texted her that it's been too much for me right now to keep in touch. I told her to enjoy the rest of her summer and I'll see her in the fall. BOOM. I got like 7 texts and a voicemail. She's still trying to call me. She needs me so much it's scary. I feel bad but I feel like its helping her.
hoping2heal Posted August 10, 2009 Posted August 10, 2009 Does this mean you broke up the relationship?
Author aboynamedmike Posted August 10, 2009 Author Posted August 10, 2009 Yea. It's been a little over a month now. We ended things after 2 1/2 rocky years together...it was pretty mutual in the end. No fighting. She understood that we had tried to work things out but was extremely upset(still is). She keeps saying how know one will ever love me as much as she did. But she cheated on me and lied about it and that planted the seed for our inevitable end 6 months later.
CaliGuy Posted August 10, 2009 Posted August 10, 2009 Yea. It's been a little over a month now. We ended things after 2 1/2 rocky years together...it was pretty mutual in the end. No fighting. She understood that we had tried to work things out but was extremely upset(still is). She keeps saying how know one will ever love me as much as she did. But she cheated on me and lied about it and that planted the seed for our inevitable end 6 months later. Then I say block her access to you (FB, MS, IM, text, etc) and move on. Cheaters don't deserve a second chance IMHO.
hoping2heal Posted August 10, 2009 Posted August 10, 2009 Yea. It's been a little over a month now. We ended things after 2 1/2 rocky years together...it was pretty mutual in the end. No fighting. She understood that we had tried to work things out but was extremely upset(still is). She keeps saying how know one will ever love me as much as she did. But she cheated on me and lied about it and that planted the seed for our inevitable end 6 months later. Okay, I have a better understanding now. Yeah, you need to cut the ties with her. Not just because she cheated. But because I think you are under the false impression you are doing her a favor by being in her life since she appears so needy over you. You aren't. The relationship is over, you said she cheated and then lied about it and that it was the cause of the demise in the relationship. You also mentioned you had began to move on. You are doing her NO, I mean NONE whatsoever favors. What you are doing is not HELPING her, it is enabling her. You are giving her false hope, you just don't realise you're doing the wrong thing because this is what temporarily soothes her. She needs to move on and so do you (fully). It's important you cut the ties or you're going to cause more and worse hurt.
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