worrier Posted August 9, 2009 Posted August 9, 2009 Hey everyone!... I think I am just worrying too much due to the fact that in the past I have been hurt badly and I cant let it happen to me again. I met the most gorgeous guy two months ago. Straight away we both laid eyes on each other and suddenly I felt a connection with him. Two months on I have been away with him and had the best holiday ever and seen him another two times after that which were both amazing. We both admit that there is a connection there and we both love each other. I know he does because hes told me a million times and because of the little things he does...in fact noone has ever treated me in such a way before...even things we talk about. The only bad thing is that he works away. He is a long distance driver and travels around the world...he works everyday. He was married for 21 years and divorced 5 years ago. Since then he has had relationships but nothing serious as far as I know...he said its difficult because he is never in one place...he constantly travels. He also said that the connection we have together is something that doesnt happen everyday, not even every year or every five years... Last week I decided to get myself tested for STD's as he brought up the conversation of us not using protection. He says he gets tested regulary and has never had anything in his life before. He always uses condoms and hasnt only with me and his ex wife. I have had sex with a few people in the past without using protection so I went for the test as I wanted our relationship to get off to a good start if you know what I mean. Two days later the clinic rang and said I had Chlamidya! I rang him straight away and he was OK with it, yes it wasnt a pleasant suprise but he said OK we will get through this, i'll have to find a doctor (as he wasnt in his home country). That evening he them texted me back saying dont worry i'll sort it, lets be happy it wasnt anything worse. The text felt a bit cold to me though...I think I was just worrying too much though? I didnt hear from him the next day and the day after that I text him saying 'I'm really sorry, please dont think bad of me...' Later that night he texted back saying 'Dont worry it changes nothing, I still love you, my feeling for you do not change, I do not judge you on this....' That was 2 days ago...I have heard nothing since. Please tell me I havent ruined things? I'm sure everything is OK but I think I just need a text or call off him to reassure me. I usually hear from him everydAY OR every two days at least by text or phone. He did get a very expensive phone bill though last month and said he wouldnt be able to phone me as much. I miss him so much though and I dont want to let him go...I havent been this happy in a long time. Also, is anyone on here in a long distance relationship...do they work? Any tips, etc? Also how much texting/phoning is too much? What are your views? Thanks! xxxxxxx A worried girl!
Hkizzle Posted August 9, 2009 Posted August 9, 2009 A long distance driver around the world? Just curious what that entails? What does he really do for a living? Yes, this question is important and related to your situation.
Author worrier Posted August 9, 2009 Author Posted August 9, 2009 He is a driver of exceptional loads, i.e. heavy, wide loads. He could pick something up in Russia for instance and have to drive it to the South of Spain.
AlektraClementine Posted August 9, 2009 Posted August 9, 2009 Have you seen any of his test results? He should have some recent ones considering how often he is tested. My concern is that you seem to be owning the burden here. How do you know for a fact that you didn't contract this from him. Chlamydia, btw is one of the most common STDs and is easily treated with meds. At any rate, I'd ask him for a copy of his most recent test.
loveslife Posted August 9, 2009 Posted August 9, 2009 It seems kind of weird. It's more likely, I would think, that a large load going from Russia to the south of Spain would go by boat. Look at a map.
Hkizzle Posted August 9, 2009 Posted August 9, 2009 Well Chlamydia is sexually transmitted. If you didn't get it from this guy, then when we your last sexual contact with another individual prior to this guy? Extremely mobile men can have multiple partners and if you've known him for just two months then are you really sure of his background, other than the connection you feel for him?
Author worrier Posted August 9, 2009 Author Posted August 9, 2009 I have had a few sexual partners recently so i'm sure it was off me but yes I could have caught it off him. Lol, the from Russia to Spain was an example...he prob would get the boat for that route...I met him while he was transporting a load on a boat, lol. Yes he could have more partners, ive kinda asked him, he just says he doesnt as its hard him working away. Am I being paranoid? He came to see me Monday just gone, had an amazing time, had tests monday morning before he came...he left me on the tues and the weds is when I had the call. Rang him straight away, one text off him weds eve...the other thurs...and none for 3 days. :-( Usually since the day I met him he rings or texts everyday or at least every other. x
AlektraClementine Posted August 9, 2009 Posted August 9, 2009 Again - have you asked him to see his most recent test? Why are you worried about whether or not you've ruined it? That is SO not the issue. When one partner is tested and receives a positive result, BOTH get treated and you move on. It's generally pretty hard to tell who gave it to who when there's no prior knowledge. I get tested on a regular basis. Once a year or after every partner. If I were single and this happened to me? I'd be able to call my doc and produce test results in less than 24 hrs. So should he.
Hkizzle Posted August 9, 2009 Posted August 9, 2009 Very few people (especially men) keep the same intensity of communication as at the very beginning. Simply because when you already know someone likes you, you can relax a bit. It's hard to tell if he's put off by your news with the amount of info you have given. Just don't start getting needy and chasing him down, that only backfires even if it eases your worries.
Author worrier Posted August 9, 2009 Author Posted August 9, 2009 Yes thats true...I think im just paranoid because of this happening...I dont want him to think I sleep around. Yes, I could scare him away...i'm sure I will hear from him very soon. Thanks everyone xxxxxxx
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