runnergal Posted August 8, 2009 Posted August 8, 2009 Ok...met this guy several months ago through work related business. Then a few months later he emails me after he found my email address. He was kind and sweet. We "talked" back and forth through email getting to know each other. He called me the next day and we chatted for about 20 minutes. He asked me out for the next week. We talked several times prior to the date. Everything was great! We went out and it was fabulous (no sex:)) He asked me to go out again that week before he left. I agreed. We went out and it was great. Again, no sex. The next time, he came to my house and I cooked a lovely dinner for him. We chatted a long time!! I even asked him what he was looking for and he said "long term relationship". That's when things got hot and heavy. And of course, the sex was awesome! Then the next time we went out I went to his house and we went out to eat. Then we went out with another couple that are friends of mine. Things, again, were still going strong and great! But then that night, we had a little too much to drink, I confessed to him that he didn't know how much I loved him. He told me he cared about me and said he was better at showing through actions than words. But then I rolled over to go to sleep and he whispered in my ear "I know how much"...I was like "huh???"...he said "I know how much you love me". He spent the night and then left the next morning to go to work. We talked every day but he rarely called saying that he doesn't like the phone because he's on it all day??!!? That saturday he stood me up, no phone call, no text, no im. He sent me a message the next day stating that he was sorry for his "unusual" behavior that some friends of his had come over and they began drinking. I asked him if had occured to him that he was supposed to be somewhere and he said "yes, but it was too late at that point." ????? He explained several days later that there were some issues with work that were extremely "freaking him out". After that things just starting getting really weird! He wasn't communicating during the day like he used to. If I called him to say "hey", he wouldn't answer and wouldn't return my phone call. I was so confused at that point. He seemed like he liked me and said that he cared about me, but then acts in a totally different way. It's been 2 months since he started the whole "distancing" thing. He says things are really stressful at work right now. I gave him a week of space, which he asked for. He seemed ok and even came over the next week and hung out. He even got sick and acted mad if I didn't ask how he was feeling...If I didn't ask, he made sure he told me! LOL Then he started acting aloof and strange again. I even emailed him and asked him if wasn't interested anymore. He never responded but I know he got the email. That's when I told him, enough of the drama and that I was moving on, I deserved better because I am a beautiful person inside and outside. He responded to me apologizing to me and agreeing with me and accepting all the fault and told me that we'll just move on from here and that he wasn't at a point to provide the proper treatment to me and apologized for hurting my feelings. Then me being the person that I am, I asked if we could be friends and he said "of course". We're still talking and I even told him that I hope that one day he knows how I feel for him. His response was a "smiley face". He's been more responsive to my feeling and well being since the email. So is he commitment phobic, not really interested in me, or just looking for a "booty call"?????
Vicious_Delicious Posted August 8, 2009 Posted August 8, 2009 Sounds like he's not interested. Sorry. But he's acting like a complete douche. If he had any class, he would keep stringing you along and tell you straight up what he was thinking. Drop him and move on. I think you may have dropped the L-word a bit too soon and freaked him out.
clueless24 Posted August 8, 2009 Posted August 8, 2009 i had similar experiences and it's not worth the trouble to go through with these type of guys. relationships are complicated enough w/o the added mystery and mind games. my guess is that he found someone new and is trying to brush you off or else he's just not mature enough to commit to a healthy relationship. some guys think that when we say "i love you" we mean marriage and they run. his loss. good luck to ya!
amymarieca Posted August 9, 2009 Posted August 9, 2009 It appears from this post that you have only been on a few dates with this guy and you told him you loved him? It's way too soon to be talking about that kind of stuff and I don't blame the guy for freaking out.
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