espec10001 Posted August 7, 2009 Posted August 7, 2009 This is very sad. You advise him to give up hope, lower his expectations to zero and start...playing an instrument? Getting a puppy? Some people...but well, if it makes you happy. Umm, no where did I say give up hope. I said stop focusing on them, don't make them a priority in life. And just because people can find fulfillment in other things besides relationships is a good thing, and just because you can't doesn't mean it's wrong friend
utterer of lies Posted August 7, 2009 Posted August 7, 2009 Umm, no where did I say give up hope. I said stop focusing on them, don't make them a priority in life. And just because people can find fulfillment in other things besides relationships is a good thing, and just because you can't doesn't mean it's wrong friend Of course you can find fulfillment in other things, but unless there's a woman in your life, something is just missing, and all the guitar playing and art and whatnot cannot make up for that. As always, ymmv Edit: I mean long-term, of course, in the short-term, sometimes being alone is very helpful and great and needed.
stillafool Posted August 7, 2009 Posted August 7, 2009 I'm going to have to pass on some incredible wisdom that one of the responders to his video wrote: True, dat - brother. True, dat. Some of the lonely guys on this board that post their pure desperation and have really bad attitudes really make me nervous. I can think of a few off the top of my head. I won't name names. But maybe the isp addys should be passed along to law enforcement. I agree with the "lowering standards" solution to loneliness. There is always someone out there who will want you. It's just that everyone seems to want a "complete hottie" in order to be happy. Maybe men should try looking for women who are beautiful on the inside instead of constantly seeking out the pretty girls and getting shot down each time.
Vet Posted August 7, 2009 Posted August 7, 2009 Of course all the facts have not come in yet, and like all things of this kind of nature, the full story will probably never be known for sure. However, it seems to me that this guy had a lot more problems than hating women. He seemed to feel rejected by society at large, and his mother and women in specific. Honestly, from everything he posted, he seems like a whiny little bitch, which is probably the indiscernible quality that he couldn't figure out with why people did not like him.
Sam Spade Posted August 7, 2009 Posted August 7, 2009 Blah blah blah it's society's fault. Errr, no it isn't. And did you think through what you are proposing? Some woman should give up their lives and marry those weak losers in order to appease them, to prevent another killing spree? Sounds a bit like slavery. Or maybe state-sponsored prostitutes for omega-males? Because empathy was not what Sodini wanted. First, that's not what I'm saying at all. Second, it is easy to profess personal responsibility from the comfort of a trouble-free existence* - because, well, it absolves us from responsibility of thinking about how we treat others. The whole premise of the american way of life is that if you struggle with something - anything at all - then there must be something wrong with you so go crawl into your hole and don't spoil the view for the rest of us. I guess your solution is to shoot all maladjusted people before they shoot somebody. . I can see the appeal of that, but wherher this is the right thing to do is up for debate. as I said before, i'd take him down personally if I happened to be around. But i'm still making the point that at least some of this could possibly be avoided through paying more attention to troubled people before they snap completely. Take the Virginia Tech shooter - he had problems for years, but both his family and the university ignored them for years as well. Not incidentally, he was Korean - one of the least emphatetic societies on the planet. If you want to know where is the largest number of teenage suicides - go to Korea and Japan. (*Hm, I guess that explains why rich, old, white dudes are the most vocal proponents of 'fiscal responsibility'. That's fine, but when you're born in a ghetto, for example, there is not much to be fiscally responsible with)
stillafool Posted August 7, 2009 Posted August 7, 2009 Yet Sodini pretty much blamed black guys for taking all the good white women.
marlena Posted August 7, 2009 Posted August 7, 2009 But i'm still making the point that at least some of this could possibly be avoided through paying more attention to troubled people before they snap completely. Yes, this is what a humane society would do. I think the key phrase is BEFORE they snap. We have all come across people like this, people walking a fine line between sanity and insanity. In fact, I'll take it even a step further and say that we are all capable of snapping at some point of our lives. Sometimes holding onto one's sanity becomes a real struggle. Some people are more fragile than others. If we could reach out to these people in need before their problems overwhelm them, perhaps we would have less incidents like this. Just look at the number of people in therapy and on meds. This as far as I am concerned denotes a huge social problem. So, yes, to a degree, society is partially responsible. Maybe it's time to reverse some of the damage and, like that old song used to go, "think of your fellow man, give him a helping hand." Maybe too much self-absorption and apathy is driving us all a little out of our heads!
marlena Posted August 7, 2009 Posted August 7, 2009 I looked at his youtube videos and read some of his blog, and what disturbed me most was that i found myself identifying with so much of his loneliness and rage. I'm about to turn 23, have never had a girlfriend, and no longer have any true friends. I'm completely unsatisfied with my life and have become extremely depressed. I differ to him in that i don't have his hatred towards women, but who knows, a few more years like this and that will probably happen. I'm well on the road to becoming another George Sodini. If i freak out in a couple of years then this thread will be a testament to that. Acquire a sense of humour, go out, make friends, learn to laugh with others and with yourself, have a few drinks, go to the movies, call people up, find interesting things to do, travel if you can but most of all, look at the funny side of life. Forget about gfs. If it happens, it happens. I'm sure that once you feel better about yourself, girls will pay more attention.
Trialbyfire Posted August 7, 2009 Posted August 7, 2009 Sodini believed that over 100 girls/women, thought he was a "nice guy". If so, they would have been nice back to him. I don't think any amount of "niceness" can change victim mentality. It only enhances it since it enables the victim cycle. If you notice, he did receive invitations to social events, not that he focused on those. His focus was on all the "wrongs done to him", rather than the positives that have happened in his life. So then, are women expected to mercy date men who gross them out or turn them off? I think not...
Author celebratedsummer Posted August 7, 2009 Author Posted August 7, 2009 Acquire a sense of humour, go out, make friends, learn to laugh with others and with yourself, have a few drinks, go to the movies, call people up, find interesting things to do, travel if you can but most of all, look at the funny side of life. Forget about gfs. If it happens, it happens. I'm sure that once you feel better about yourself, girls will pay more attention. I do have a sense of humor. When i actually get to know people i am constantly cracking jokes and some people know me as a bit of a comedian. But i rarely get a chance to show that as i am so damn shy and withdrawn most of the time. People accused me of trolling with this thread but that wasn't my intention. I was just trying to make a point. I have no hatred towards women whatsoever and i am completely against violence towards women. I'm just saying that years of loneliness can have a very bad effect on some people,and i hope that doesn't ever happen to me.
marlena Posted August 7, 2009 Posted August 7, 2009 I'm just saying that years of loneliness can have a very bad effect on some people,and i hope that doesn't ever happen to me. Take steps now for it not to happen. Try to overcome your shyness. You are still young. In time, you will gain more self-confidence. It comes with age and experience. Besides lots of people like shy people. If you really possess a good sense of humour, an interesting, sharp and witty one, people will stand up and take notice and want you in their midst. Happy people are simply irresistable.
stillafool Posted August 9, 2009 Posted August 9, 2009 Take steps now for it not to happen. Try to overcome your shyness. You are still young. In time, you will gain more self-confidence. It comes with age and experience. Besides lots of people like shy people. If you really possess a good sense of humour, an interesting, sharp and witty one, people will stand up and take notice and want you in their midst. Happy people are simply irresistable. I love shy people.
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