NOTSURE7 Posted August 4, 2009 Posted August 4, 2009 Please don't hold anything back!!! LOL The words you speak are nothing I havent't already thought myself. Thank you for being so straight forward. What is the best way to tell her I am ending. Write a letter? Nothing? you dont owe her anything... But just dont half a$$ it... trust me you have to do full nc and then stick to it and get on with your life...
FromI Posted August 4, 2009 Posted August 4, 2009 After 5 months she cannot really think about divorce. As long as her husband doesn't know and she can continue having the affair with you, there will be no change whatsoever from her part. Being only 5 months in, you can still change everything, it is not too late. Go NC as everyone is suggesting, but really stick to it and you will get over her. I don't think you should break it off without letting her know... After all, you are in a relationship (even if it is a wrong one), you shared a lot of things in the past 5 months, you are very close, feel in love, and if you just disappear and ignore her she will keep contacting you or calling you until you explain her why you stopped. Tell her what you really think and want, and let her know that this relationship will not continue (I think the best is email; phone or personal can ruin everything). Just be prepared for her to try to contact you and try to restart everything, because she most likely will. Oh, and if you continue this affair, then in 1 or 2 years from now... when nothing changes.... both of you will be so miserable and will regret with all your heart that you were so stupid and not strong enough to stop...
brainyblonde Posted August 4, 2009 Posted August 4, 2009 msue...how i wish my MM would leave his W 4 me! u r a very small minority of the population!
brainyblonde Posted August 4, 2009 Posted August 4, 2009 this just reminds me of my A. MM proposed to me sooo often, fed me sooo many lovely words. these, i have realised, were untrue, he is staying in his M. a M where she plays away (lots of signs), she bullies him (verbally & physically), they hate each other, separate bedrooms, no sex, etc, etc. they're off to greece on thu! u need to END it! and i too have had an A whilst married, and i can remember going on hols, and being filled with so much guilt for what i doing to my H. going away on hols allows her to step out of the situation, and focus on the needs of her H. she will read her emails, send you txs, as your like a drug, and she needs her daily shot.
stampdaddy Posted August 4, 2009 Posted August 4, 2009 I would suggest that you do a little reading up on "The Godfather" of what you are in store for.... I went through 5 years of it...
NoIDidn't Posted August 4, 2009 Posted August 4, 2009 I would suggest that you do a little reading up on "The Godfather" of what you are in store for.... I went through 5 years of it... LOL. Tx-hrt, SD speaks the truth. Look through his posts to see if his MW sounds like yours.
stampdaddy Posted August 4, 2009 Posted August 4, 2009 LOL. Tx-hrt' date=' SD speaks the truth. Look through his posts to see if his MW sounds like yours.[/quote'] for a moment, I thought he was dating MY exMW......
sadintexas Posted August 5, 2009 Posted August 5, 2009 I am wondering why the txt and calls are diminishing? Is she thinking of me? Can she NOT respond because H is too close (they are together 24/7) She came over the morning before they left and spent the morning together. It was so awsome. Was this a Good-bye? I am just trying to figure all this out. Is she hurting the same as Me? Here's the thing...if you're going to be involved with a MP, you're going to have be able to let this type of thinking and wondering go. It's only going to drive you crazy. If you want to be there, you have to understand her limitations right now, not bank on the future, and enjoy what you have. OR you can do what was already suggested and break it off with her and let her see if she wants to live without you or not. Either way, obsessing over the MP is very unhealthy for you.
ednadean Posted August 8, 2009 Posted August 8, 2009 oh man, you're being wasy too nice. Girls are EASY to deal with. [i'm a girl btw, not being offensive or anything]. You're acting like a desperate puppy dog atm. She knows she can string you along indefinitely and you'll always be there and forgive all. She'll never make a decision and keep you miserable. You've just got to either a) have a chat with her and tell her that you can't keep going like this and that YOU want to take a break so she can figure all her stuff out, and in the meantime you're going to move on or; b) just cut contact with her and be MUCH more aloof than she is [i.e. only respond to 5% of emails and texts and stop driving her into work etc etc] It will be hard for the first few weeks -- but she'll come running back to you, if she likes you. And she'll b yours properly because she'll get rid of her husband/boyfriend too. Otherwise she won't and at least you'll know where you stand.
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