Author lucy loo Posted August 1, 2009 Author Posted August 1, 2009 I didnt dump him... The last time I saw him he acted rudely, he wouldnt give me a lift home even though i live around the corner and fell asleep before i had left.. so i just didnt reply to his text, he didnt try very hard to continue to text me after that... I found out this info on wikipedia, so maybe not 100 reliable but surely this info must have come from somewhere especially if they can name the girl! I cant understand how he managed to pull this off for so long.. I mean where was the girlfriend???? and he even got his flat mate to lie to me... !
2sunny Posted August 1, 2009 Posted August 1, 2009 I didnt dump him... The last time I saw him he acted rudely, he wouldnt give me a lift home even though i live around the corner and fell asleep before i had left.. so i just didnt reply to his text, he didnt try very hard to continue to text me after that... I found out this info on wikipedia, so maybe not 100 reliable but surely this info must have come from somewhere especially if they can name the girl! I cant understand how he managed to pull this off for so long.. I mean where was the girlfriend???? and he even got his flat mate to lie to me... ! wiki - a site where anyone can insert any info as the posts go along... not reliable info at all. anyone can adjust the info according to their liking - and totally inaccurate. if you truly wonder - just ask him for the truth.
lucy9216 Posted August 1, 2009 Posted August 1, 2009 I would have to agree with just about everyone's responses in here. You need to put this guy in your past and just think of it as a life experience and well learned lesson on what to keep your eyes open too in your next relationship. Focusing on him and what he did is not going to help you at all, it will only make moving on that much more difficult. You can and will do better than him. if you really feel the need to have closure you could always send a very nice and polite email saying something like "It was really nice getting to know you, I wish you the best and take care." I would honeslty think it would be best to just leave it though and not say anything because it has been 3 weeks and he will know you have been sitting around thinking about him for 3 weeks, but if you really feel the need to have closure just send that email. You don't want to be mean or hurtful because that just makes you look childish. Best of luck to you and with with the next one.
Author lucy loo Posted August 2, 2009 Author Posted August 2, 2009 Thanks for the help everyone... so to close this discussion should I send a message/e-mail to him and if so what should i say??????? Ideas for good things to say please...
2sunny Posted August 2, 2009 Posted August 2, 2009 yes correspond, honesty is always best... how about - need clarification from you - are you currently dating/living with a gal? had an indication that this is true and wanted to know from you...
Author lucy loo Posted August 2, 2009 Author Posted August 2, 2009 Thats good sunny!! anyone else got any other ideas????????
Author lucy loo Posted August 2, 2009 Author Posted August 2, 2009 peeps good message ideas pleaseeeee i think i need the closure
enchanted771 Posted August 2, 2009 Posted August 2, 2009 You don't need him, he's a loser! how is he well known?
Fay Posted August 2, 2009 Posted August 2, 2009 peeps good message ideas pleaseeeee i think i need the closure No no no! Don't do that! You're just looking for an excuse to contact him. That would be so undignified, since your EX-football-playing, almost-famous-but-not-famous ex-not-boyfriend hasn't even made the slightest effort to contact you for weeks. FORGET ABOUT HIM. What I would do in your shoes is go to the nearest bar tonight, pick out the hottest single guy there, strike up a conversation and take it from there. Take your mind off the douchebag. Why are you still hung up on him? He's GONE. If you contact him it's just going to stroke his ego that you still think about him at all. Yes, he played you like a rusty trombone. It sucks, but it happens. It's high time you got a new guy.
whichwayisup Posted August 2, 2009 Posted August 2, 2009 Make your own closure. You don't need him to give you closure. He lied to you all along and he's a sh.it! What's the point of trying to get closure? How can you believe anything that he says anyway? Even if he did talk to you, he isn't going to give you what you want and end this with a nice red bow so you can feel better.. Try to let go, be around your friends, have fun and forget this guy. He isn't worthy of your time and effort, let alone tears!
Fay Posted August 2, 2009 Posted August 2, 2009 Lucy, let's look at this objectively here. The guy USED to play football. He doesn't anymore. He's some sort of white-collar worker now or something, from what I remember from your other thread. He's average-looking. You never even noticed him until your boss pushed you to go out with him. He's a total as*hole. He can't even afford to live by himself - he has a roommate. He's not really "famous". You were never going to become "that famous guy's girlfriend" because no one would really recognize him. If he were "famous", he'd probably have more money and wouldn't be working some white-collar Joe Schmoe job now. He's a total as*hole. I think the truth is you can't get over how you were ALMOST "that famous guy's girlfriend" and then he flicked you away like a used condom. I know it sounds harsh, and I'm sorry. I don't mean to offend and you'll see why next paragraph. Anyway, this guy gets away with his schtick because there are so many other groupie-types who will accept this kind of thing and get caught up with him just because at some point in the past he kicked a ball around a grass field for money. He really doesn't have much going for him, from everything you've said. Not a catch at all. Why you should not be offended at what I said: I'm a serial semi-celebrity dater myself. Except in my case it happens to be musicians. I haven't dated a single non-musician in nine years, and about a third of them were signed to labels and touring. And most were very good-looking. In the beginning, of course I got kicks out of being with the guy that the other girls weren't "good enough to be with" . Now it's just a lifestyle that I can't see myself getting out of, because other men bore me and I have little in common with them, but it's not a conscious choice. And there's not much to gloat about. They, like other semi-celebrities, tend to be duplicitous and self-absorbed. It ends one of two ways: they get bored and find someone better because they can; or it ends in a big raging ball of fire with flying glassware and curses on each others' descendants. It's not something I would recommend to anyone at all. If I could find happiness in a nice accountant boy I would be the luckiest woman alive. These guys aren't worth the trouble it takes to get them. You have to be "better" than every other girl in town, work ten times as hard, and in the end your "prize" is the same old sh*t kind of partner you would've gotten anyway, or worse. Yours especially doesn't sound like he's worth the hassle. So just move on! Forget the scumbag!
WineCountry Posted August 2, 2009 Posted August 2, 2009 Wait a minute Lucy loo.. Arent you the same one who has the post on here Why Do Men Disappear?? On that post you say you have been seeing a guy you met on POF (im assuming plenty of fish) and his profile was still active and he was being distant. This guy on this thread you say your BOSS introduced you to..and he's some football guy. How many guys are u dating? And u cant complain if you have more than one stud puppy playing fetch yourself.
Fay Posted August 2, 2009 Posted August 2, 2009 On that post you say you have been seeing a guy you met on POF (im assuming plenty of fish) and his profile was still active and he was being distant. You're confused. The person who wrote the plenty of fish thread was enchanted771.
WineCountry Posted August 2, 2009 Posted August 2, 2009 You're confused. The person who wrote the plenty of fish thread was enchanted771. I stand corrected..you are right. :laugh: I read them both and got them all twisted.
loveslife Posted August 2, 2009 Posted August 2, 2009 Lucy Loo, I know you're hurt and angry and want answers or some type of comfort more than anything. But contacting this jerk is not going to make you feel better. If anything, at this point, it will be more of an undoing for you. Believe me, I've been there. You just want something from him - some type of validation or vindication. Be good to yourself and move on.
Samari Posted August 2, 2009 Posted August 2, 2009 This is starting to look like groundhog day. Steve McNair all over again.
Author lucy loo Posted August 4, 2009 Author Posted August 4, 2009 ok so after a month (he was away for two of those two weeks) He text me this afternoon saying "Hi Trouble,Hope your well. Iv not seen your around as been away" I haven't replied.. what should I do??????????
dreamergrl Posted August 4, 2009 Posted August 4, 2009 ok so after a month (he was away for two of those two weeks) He text me this afternoon saying "Hi Trouble,Hope your well. Iv not seen your around as been away" I haven't replied.. what should I do?????????? It's called no contact. He wants you to reply. You want to feel better, then feel better knowing you're the better person by walking away.
Author lucy loo Posted August 4, 2009 Author Posted August 4, 2009 so i say absolutely nothing in response??? and then what happens when i bump into him as I will! Also, if i dont respond do u reckon he will try and contact me again or will he just leave it?
dreamergrl Posted August 4, 2009 Posted August 4, 2009 so i say absolutely nothing in response??? and then what happens when i bump into him as I will! Also, if i dont respond do u reckon he will try and contact me again or will he just leave it? Who cares? He's an a$$. Do you what you want, but if you continue to reply to him, then you'll stay in the web you're in now.
Art_Critic Posted August 4, 2009 Posted August 4, 2009 Who cares? He's an a$$. Do you what you want, but if you continue to reply to him, then you'll stay in the web you're in now. DG.. she wants him back or keep her options open with him.. otherwise she would just ignore the 3 pump chump and not even give it a second thought...
whichwayisup Posted August 4, 2009 Posted August 4, 2009 Say NOTHING. Silence is golden...It gives you the power without having to say a word and it'll make him wonder WTF.
dreamergrl Posted August 4, 2009 Posted August 4, 2009 DG.. she wants him back or keep her options open with him.. otherwise she would just ignore the 3 pump chump and not even give it a second thought... Apparently. Yet I can't bring myself to give advice to that
Author lucy loo Posted August 4, 2009 Author Posted August 4, 2009 I do still have feelings for him but know i should not go back... regardless i want tomake him realize he has done me wrong.. is silenece the best way to show him that?
Art_Critic Posted August 4, 2009 Posted August 4, 2009 LL.. Total and absolute silence is deafening Though it seems to me that you are just looking to get your licks in so he will change and you will take him back when his GF dumps him.. thusly keeping your options open..
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