icecream Posted July 31, 2009 Posted July 31, 2009 so, i met this wonderful guy at a drug and alcohol class. sound wierd? i know. lol. anyways, i remember the first time i had ever seen him. i told myself, "dude, he's so not even cute, i would never date him, i can do wayy better than him" im really not a cocky person, but he looked alot like my ex that bothered the ****kk outta me. so it really turned me away from him. anyway, i was trying to get this other guy's number, and he was standing next to that other guy, so i decided to be nice and get both of they're numbers(: lol. so i asked him his name and he gave me his first initial. lol. and for the longest time i never knew his real name, i think it was like a month that i didnt know his name. anyways, after that day we never really texted.and if we did, he always came onto me and i would feel extremely bothered, and pist. lol. then one day he told me he liked me, and asked me if i thought he was cute. and i thought about it. and ithought about all the convos we had, and overall, i thought he was sooo much more than cute. he always knew the right words to say and i grew heavily attatched to him. this was really wierd, i never grew attatched before, and this feeling was different, never had experienced it. I DIDNT KNOW WHAT LOVE WAS? so he made me feel on top of the world! and we finally got together after 2 weeks of talking. he really rushed into this relationship though. like i really wanted to take things slow, but, he was rushing into this relationship, and i trusted him. so we got together. we have sooooo many great memories. and he taught me alot of stuff. he taught me to love myself, to be strong, and he was the only one that never put me down. he was the only one there for me when i had lost my best friend. and he made me feel great, after the worst moments in my life. he helped me get over little bumps in the road, our relationship was sooo PERFECT! buht yet, after 3 little situations, our relationship ended. the funniest part is we were only together for a month. he said some really reallly really mean things about me, thats y we pretty much broke up. i never saw him out of that drug and alcohol class. he always lagged our dates, the first time he reallly couldnt go. buht after that, he had no desire to go on a date with me. it broke my heart. and it scarrred me for life. im still sad up to this day. i have no clue why. our relationship ended back in april. we were only together a month.we talked that whole month of april. (:and i was happy. anytime i get to talk to him, im happy. ever since we broke up, i've had this ugly incomplete feeling. sucks. and i havent dated after that relationship. and its wierd cause i always had a new boyfriend as sooon as i broke upwith my old bf. buht he has a new girlfriend. and it bothers me. not because he's dating again. but because he lead me on, the last week of april we had a conversation, through texting he told me he didnt know whether or not to move on. and i told him not to. and we talked the rest of that night. i stayed up sooo late, knowing that i had cst testing the next day, for school. and booom, after that, we never had any communication. and if we did, it was a hi bye thing. nothing big. now we're cool. i guess? it sucks how we were sooo close, we were sooo compatible. and we never went farther than kissing. and we both went through that whole depressed heart break scene. and im completely confused. i dont know what to do. how do you move on? i dont want to get hurt again. im sad, im mad, i want him, but he doesnt want me. its not fair, he wanted me in the beginning, and now i want him in the ending.
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