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I emigrated for my boyfriend, now he doesn't love me


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Posted

This is my first post here, I just feel so isolated at the moment, any help anyone can give me is greatly appreciated.

 

I met my boyfriend and fell in love with him in the UK. He was lovely to me then and told he loved me too. He's Australian and when he lost his job in the UK, we decided to come to Australia. He went first and I stayed behind to work my notice in my job and followed him out 6 weeks later.

 

As soon as I got here he told me he'd changed his mind about me. I gave up my friends, my family and my career. I sold most of my stuff. I wasn't even over my jet lag and he was just so cruel to me.

 

Now, 10 weeks later, we are still living together in Australia. I have nowhere else to go, I don't know anyone out here. It still hasn't sunk in that he could be this cruel to me, and the worst part is, I still love him.

 

Everytime my mum phones I have to pretend everything is ok, she's even asked me if he plans to marry me. I just don't know what to do.

Posted

that is very sad, I feel bad for you. Your best plan of action is to tell your mom the truth, get some help, and head back to the UK and start over. Don't feel ashamed for what happened, you weren't the one that lied, you have nothing to feel guilty about.

Posted

Where in Australia are you?

 

Bugger the BF, why don't you make the most of being where you are for awhile before you go straight back home?

In Sydney, Melbourne and Perth there are huge expat Brit communities of people who have either emigrated permanently or are on a working holiday for a year or two.

 

HERE is a website that could help you find a flat either with some other Brits or people your own age, and its also got a good jobs section there too.

 

You may as well see some of this part of the world while you are here!

 

I lived in the UK for 7 years (am from NZ) and most of the time it was a blast. In fact the worst bits were when I was mooning over a couple of British guys and agonising whether or not to stay permanently.

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Posted

I've decided I do want to stay in Australia. I'm in Sydney at the moment. I've just been offered a permanent job here and I've got a year on my visa, so I may as well make the most of it. But I just keep wishing he'd change his mind and that we'll work things out. I guess all I can do is get on with living my life. I'm definitely not going to give in and go home.

Posted
I've decided I do want to stay in Australia. I'm in Sydney at the moment. I've just been offered a permanent job here and I've got a year on my visa, so I may as well make the most of it. But I just keep wishing he'd change his mind and that we'll work things out. I guess all I can do is get on with living my life. I'm definitely not going to give in and go home.

 

Make lemonade out of lemons!

 

You never know, you may look back at this from 5 years from now and realize that if this hadn't happened, you never would have gotten where you wanted to be!

 

RF

Posted

LPP, I hope you stay and make the best of it. I'm rooting for you to succeed and show him. Living well is the best revenge.

Posted

Oh this is awful. :( But congrats on the job. :)

 

You need to find a place, you can't keep staying with him. The practical things will help you feel a little less helpless when you have them sorted. :o The link sb gave you is good, try realestate.com.au also if you're after your own place.

 

If you have questions, it must be intimidating being alone in a new place, just ask here and we can help. I live in Sydney myself and there are a couple of others, we're here to help. :)

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