confusedcookie Posted July 30, 2009 Posted July 30, 2009 so i started to have trust issues with my bf (ex as of yday) after i found out he lied to me about his ex gf. he said they mutually broke up, it turned out, he cheated on her. he came home one night and swore up and down and made me feel so guilty that he didn't smoke, he admitted to it a week later. i found a bracelet near our bed that apparently belonged to his god sis. she apparently came over one night when we were out on vacation and decided to sleep over, even when she lives on the 9th floor and we on the 29th of the same building (biggest suspicion, but giving him the benefit of the doubt) yesterday: he's moving out and she's helping him bc she wants a piece of the furniture, so the moving van said they would come at 12pm to appraise the stuff to sell second hand, a nice drawer/ tv cabinet and i couch with no back to it. he texts, never calls me or talks to me on the phone in front of her (me and her have some issues aside from this, and we do not get along), and saids at 5 that they are still waiting for the van. okay, so i'm eating dinner and he phones at 6 bc he's done, tells me that the movers said the drawer is too big for pppl to like and that no one will buy a backless couch. so i get suspicious, they're together for 5 hours waiting for a van that was suppose to come at 12 but then nothing can be sold. i tell him im upset, and will talk after, but he accuses me of eating dinner with a guy friend, and going out afterwards (plans that he already knew of b4hand) but not spending time with him bc he's flying continents away the next day. we have a fight on the phone, i see him the next day to get back some stuff from his house, i ask him if he has anything to see to me, and he says no. i cry, and call him and say that, if you leave now like that, we will never see each other again, and he says MAIN POINTS: i feel that we have different morals and values. i will miss you, i love you, but i want to have time apart for you can grow into a more mature person, and maybe then we can have a future together. i say: you're giving everything we had up, you won't even come after me now him: silence... he says he wants me, and loves me... but if i didn't call him, he would have just left in front of my eyes.... though the god sis thing has been talked about quite a bit for the past 6 months, trust issues for me. but he put the insecurity there, shouldn't he be responsible to calm my suspicion down everytime? i'm confused, please help =(
Thomas X Forever Posted July 30, 2009 Posted July 30, 2009 shouldn't he be responsible to calm my suspicion down everytime? Not once you're broken up, unfortunately. I feel for you, I know the pain. The sudden loss. Dealing with not talking to someone you talked to every single day before. Emptiness, pain, regret, confusion, anger, grief...
carhill Posted July 30, 2009 Posted July 30, 2009 If I'm reading this right (I got cross-eyed there for a moment ), he's projecting his own behaviors onto you. He sounds so immature I'm surprised there's not an umbilical cord still attached. TBH, I think you both should do some maturing alone. Hard to tell from one post. You backstory sounds complicated from my quick read but I'll go with that instinct for now.
Recommended Posts