Tsuki no Michi Posted July 30, 2009 Posted July 30, 2009 A husband and wife were out enjoying a round of golf, and about to tee off on the third hole lined with beautiful homes. The wife hit her shot and the ball began to slice - her shot was headed directly at a very large plate glass window. Much to her surprise, the ball smashed through the window and shattered it into a million pieces. They felt compelled to see what damage was done and drove off to see what happened. When they peeked inside the house, they found no one there. The husband called out and no one answered. Upon further investigation, they saw a gentleman sitting on the couch witth a turban on his head. The wife asked the man, "Do you live here?" "No, someone just hit a ball through the window, knocked over the vase you see there, freeing me from that little bottle. I am so grateful!" he answered. The wife asked "Are you a genie?" "Oh, why yes I am. In fact, I am so grateful i will grant you two wishes, and the third I will keep for myself." the man replied. The husband and wife agreed on two wishes - one was for a scratch handicap for the husband, to which the wife readily agreed. The other was for an income of $1,000,000 per year forever. The genie nodded his head and said "Done!" The genie now said, "For my wish, I would like to have my way with your wife. I have not been with a woman for many years, and after all, I made you a scratch golfer and a millionaire." The husband and wife agreed. After the genie and wife were finished, the genie asked the wife "How long have you been married?" To which she responded "Three years." The genie then asked "How old is your husband?" To which she replied "31 years old" The genie then asked "And how long has he believed in this genie stuff?" :-) TNM
NoIDidn't Posted July 30, 2009 Posted July 30, 2009 Funny. But why did the wife believe in the genie stuff too? I'm slow. LOL
Author Tsuki no Michi Posted July 31, 2009 Author Posted July 31, 2009 Funny. But why did the wife believe in the genie stuff too? I'm slow. LOL I think it's supposed to mean she knew all along. But I could be wrong as well... Here's another one: Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible." My loving wife of 10 years replied, "Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?" And then the fight started...
NoIDidn't Posted July 31, 2009 Posted July 31, 2009 i think it's supposed to mean she knew all along. But i could be wrong as well... Here's another one: saturday morning i got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so i pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day. i went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "the weather out there is terrible." my loving wife of 10 years replied, "can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?" and then the fight started... h.i.l.a.r.i.o.u.s!!!!
NoIDidn't Posted July 31, 2009 Posted July 31, 2009 I have one for you: A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door. "Hurry," she said, "stand in the corner." She rubbed baby oil all over him, then dusted him with talcum powder. "Don't move until I tell you," she said. "Pretend you're a statue." "What's this?" the husband inquired as he entered the room. "Oh it's a statue." she replied. "The Smith's bought one and I liked it so much I got one for us, too." No more was said, not even when they went to bed. Around 2 AM the husband got up, went to the kitchen and returned with a sandwich and a beer. "Here," he said to the statue, "have this. I stood like that for two days at the Smith's and nobody offered me a damned thing."
Author Tsuki no Michi Posted July 31, 2009 Author Posted July 31, 2009 I have one for you: Excellent! This is one of my all-time favorites: FRIENDLY ARGUMENT During a friendly argument, my husband asked me why I married him in the first place. "I was just stupid," I teased. When he said he was happy to hear that, I requested an explanation. "People get divorced all the time because they fall out of love," he said. "But I've never heard of anybody falling out of stupid." .
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