crissie Posted July 30, 2009 Posted July 30, 2009 So I asked the guy I was dating for another chance... He said no a couple of times, then wrote me an email on Monday asking if he could come over on Friday, I said yes, then I get an email like this.... What am I suppose to think?? I'm a little concerned about friday... I'm not sure what I'm going to feel or how things will go. If I turn out to not be feeling it, r u going to be ok? (or at least prepared) Also, I don't want to automatically consider everything is fine and were together again. I need to see what's up and how I feel. I'm a feeler, not a thinker... I would completely understand u being offended. This was a big breakup and I need to figure it out. I'm missing u a lot, but also want to be very cautious... Please let me know what u think.
joseffrost Posted July 30, 2009 Posted July 30, 2009 The words 'hedging' and 'bets' come to mind... Think of it this way, if a friend invited you out but said 'I'm not sure if I'll want to talk to you or if I can be bothered to be friends with you anymore or not, we'll see how I feel', would you tolerate it? You wouldn't accept it from friends, so why an ex??
utterer of lies Posted July 30, 2009 Posted July 30, 2009 So I asked the guy I was dating for another chance... He said no a couple of times, then wrote me an email on Monday asking if he could come over on Friday, I said yes, then I get an email like this.... What am I suppose to think?? I'm a little concerned about friday... I'm not sure what I'm going to feel or how things will go. If I turn out to not be feeling it, r u going to be ok? (or at least prepared) Also, I don't want to automatically consider everything is fine and were together again. I need to see what's up and how I feel. I'm a feeler, not a thinker... I would completely understand u being offended. This was a big breakup and I need to figure it out. I'm missing u a lot, but also want to be very cautious... Please let me know what u think. How desperate are you, anyway? Don't accept this.
Author crissie Posted July 30, 2009 Author Posted July 30, 2009 Yeah, I really need to just stop talking to him.... He is really driving me into a mental hospital.
boogieboy Posted July 30, 2009 Posted July 30, 2009 Yeah if you arent going to tell him to scram for that nonsense, than at least stop seeing him for like a month so its under your control for him to miss you. Its too soon and he doesnt want you enough yet. Dont see him on friday. And start flirting with new guys, youre close to beating a dead horse with this one. I really wonder if hes tryin with another girl and he is working on her.
Author crissie Posted July 30, 2009 Author Posted July 30, 2009 I thought the same (testing out a new girl)..That is his MO, he breaks up with me, dates a whole bunch of women, gets tired of it then calls me back.... Damn it, I don't want to let him go, but how many times am I going to allow him to do this to me...CRAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!
utterer of lies Posted July 30, 2009 Posted July 30, 2009 I thought the same (testing out a new girl)..That is his MO, he breaks up with me, dates a whole bunch of women, gets tired of it then calls me back.... Damn it, I don't want to let him go, but how many times am I going to allow him to do this to me...CRAP!!!!!!!!!!!!! Be strong, or suffer. It's so simple.
stillafool Posted July 30, 2009 Posted July 30, 2009 So I asked the guy I was dating for another chance... He said no a couple of times, then wrote me an email on Monday asking if he could come over on Friday, I said yes, then I get an email like this.... What am I suppose to think?? I'm a little concerned about friday... I'm not sure what I'm going to feel or how things will go. If I turn out to not be feeling it, r u going to be ok? (or at least prepared) Also, I don't want to automatically consider everything is fine and were together again. I need to see what's up and how I feel. I'm a feeler, not a thinker... I would completely understand u being offended. This was a big breakup and I need to figure it out. I'm missing u a lot, but also want to be very cautious... Please let me know what u think. I think it means he is willing to spend time with you (maybe sex) but doesn't want you to think that this act would mean the two of you are back together. He wants you to respond that you will not put pressure on him if he still wants to move on after sex.
stillafool Posted July 30, 2009 Posted July 30, 2009 I thought the same (testing out a new girl)..That is his MO, he breaks up with me, dates a whole bunch of women, gets tired of it then calls me back.... Damn it, I don't want to let him go, but how many times am I going to allow him to do this to me...CRAP!!!!!!!!!!!!! Why????!!! He treats you like crap. Does that mean you love him more than you love you?
Author crissie Posted July 30, 2009 Author Posted July 30, 2009 Yes, I do love him more than I love myself...It's not what anyone wants to admit, but sadly, it's the truth. ;-( I wrote the email saying I don't want to see him on Friday, that since he can't seem to make up his mind, I'll make it up for him and that it is over... Now I just have to get the nerve to send it... I didn't reply to that email so he sent me another email asking if he could call, I told him I was in a meeting but would let him know when I was done - I just have to make sure that I will not take him back- EVER if I send this letter.
Author crissie Posted July 30, 2009 Author Posted July 30, 2009 I sent the email...No reply, no phone call. Nothing.. Just as expected, but I guess that is what I wanted, right... I do have to pat myself on the back for a very nicely written Dear John email... Better late then never...Oh yeah, here is the kicker: as soon as I sent it, I received a sweet offer from a job (been laid off for almost 6 months) and guess where it is... The other side of the state! That would be the side of the state he lives on...So now I get to continue on my life without him but living right down the road!
stillafool Posted July 30, 2009 Posted July 30, 2009 Good for you that you sent that email. I know it's hard and going to get harder but it will get better. Glad you got the job offer and you should take it if that's the job you want. At least you will have a change of scenery and that alone can do wonders to take your mind off things. Also you will be so involved with learning your new job that will also keep your mind busy during the day hours. You will also meet new people who know other new people you will meet. I think this is a great and fresh start for you. Get together with some friends and celebrate if you can!
Author crissie Posted July 30, 2009 Author Posted July 30, 2009 Yes, I am excited...So much to do, I can barely cry over him! Thank You! Now I just have to control myself not to call him and tell him the good news
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